After almost a year without gambling, these past few weeks I’ve fell back into it. I’ve done so well and I’m so frustrated with myself. I’ve recently moved house and it’s getting loads of work done and is a mess and I think the stress of that has triggered me to gamble again. Behind my partners back who is 6 months pregnant and we already have one child together. She doesn’t need this stress I feel so guilty and knee whilst I was gambling that there was only going to be one outcome. Today we have argued in front of our child and I’ve put stress on her and I feel terrible. I called gamblers anonymous tonight and wanted to sort it out straight away. People you can’t live your life like this. I’m going to try again to get on the straight and narrow and give it all I have . I don’t know how many more times my partner can take this plus I’ve left us skint again until pay day. Just thought I’d share my story on here to see if anyone can relate to what I’m going through and if anyone has any advice I’d love to hear it. Thanks for reading.
Good Morning,
I put myself in a position where I went 4 years without gambling only to relapse and return to gambling for about a year on and off. It was horrendous and the damage was worse than ever. As soon as I started it was like I had never stopped. Quite scary how I had fallen into old ways so easily.
Anyway, I’m almost six months gamble free again but I wish I had arrested the situation immediately and not after a year of horrendous torture.
So, forgive yourself mentally, accept the situation quickly and realise that the non gambling version of you is the best version of you. Don't let a bad situation become a horrendous life changing situation. A month or two from now your relapse will be something of the past and thats all.
Put whatever measures are necessary in place to ensure you don't gamble again.
Overall, be aware of how you feel now compared with a few months back. Gambling makes us worry, stress, get angry, cause financial hardship. Its rubbish.
Youve used it as a coping mechanism because thats what youve perhaps fone historically when things get tough. Do something else. Start running, go to a boxing class something that releases built up energy. These are healthy options that makes the difference mentally. Give it a try. You and your family deserve your best efforts.
I wish you well.
RR
Thanks for the advice mate really appreciate it.
You’re welcome.
Remember, most importantly, lost money is gone. Forever. Accept it and move on. The money you’ve lost is the cost of having a beautiful, fabulous life with your wife and unborn kid for the rest of your life. What would that be worth to you? To never have to gamble ever again. To ease and eradicate the mental torture of gambling from your life forever.
Absolutely no reason for you not to look back on this diary years from now and realise that your actions today and for the foreseeable future are what formed the great life that you can surely have.
RR
Hi Itso.
Its understandable because you now have to step up the mindset that you are a gambler in remission for the rest of your life. The door was open which you also have to analyse in depth. You have money location and trigger points which can arise even if we are feeling good about ourselves
The stress builds, the pressures of life and gambling becomes the go to drug for temporary escape and release. I will just win a bit...makes sense yeah which is the classic gamblers delusion. Only its not escape or release as it has dire consequences. Its certainly not an income scheme because it would have to be reliable in the way that you generally know your work is going to pay you
I know its more of a drug addiction than a yearning for money. Your partner should now be controlling all money if you want to keep the relationship.
Some would say capitalism is slavery. Bringing up a family isnt easy but Gambling is not the answer. Its not a james bond film and I curse all those images of gambling being a casual lifestyle.
You dont have money to lose. I never did. The people that are supposed to protect you from the sharks are cashing in on it so its a very dangerous state of affairs.
Start again with the real born again foundations...the real square one of you like. If you talk through how you gambled you will see just waht an open door it was. Your brain is vunerable as is mine. I am never complacent because I was gambling for forty years. I know its my weakness and my drug of choice.
The crazy thing is I never thought I could get addicted to anything.Throughout my gambling time I never realised how addicted I was...I just thought it was something I did and I could ride the losses until it was too late to brush it off casually any longer.
Youve been sold a lie...a dream.
You dont need it in your life.
Best wishes to you
Thanks for the advice mate really appreciate it
just done something similar myself £350 down the drain yesterday because i was "bored" in isolation
get those self exclusions submitted mate , its a lot easier when you literally cant get anything on
just make sure you get all the sites theirs loads but the more you block the more you will save in the long run
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