SadG wants to be happyG

"No gambling, no thoughts of it , no urges,no anxieties."

Me too. We must remember these simple moments if ever we are tempted. Well done.

DB

Hi G, where are you man ? starting to be worried again :-/ hope all is ok. If i get through today that's cheltenham over and done with until next year and no gambling still. Dark Place

Hi everyone

Sorry not posted much lately. Gambling is so far from my mind that I genuinely forget it's been 4/5 days since my last post but I know I need to continue to support others in their efforts so for that I apologise. Will try to get on a bit more.

Work and gym are leaving me exhausted at the moment. Seem to be either at work, in the gym or sleeping when I'm in London. Days off(Sun/Mon) are just kept for the family so tend not to post those days.

Just caught up with the second season of Game of Thrones. Love it! Great viewing all the way through. Spent last 3 days watching entire season.

4 months today. Feels like longer. So long since I last placed a bet. feels great. I just don't need it at all.

Hope you all have a wonderful weekend. Weather is lousy here in London but you can't dampen my spirits because I am an ex-gambler.

G

Hey SadG,

Congrats on your 4 months of sobriety. Good of you to be busy enjoying life again, gambling took so much from us. Stay strong!

Chicagoguy

Hi G

Thanks for your post and great to hear everything ok with you. Interesting to hear you work in Mayfair, I can think of worse places 😉 I have to say I love coming into London, such a fantastic buzz there and everything is accepted. You can kind of lose yourself and seek the good and the bad in everything.

Maybe one day we will meet in shepherds market and have a few beers and laugh in the face of the betting industry and the fact we managed to beat it and see it for what it truly is ! a truly disgusting disease that destroys life's and their family life's.

Today I will take a few pints and watch Chelsea v west ham, there is a bar here that has those foreign channels and shows all the games.

Well done G for keeping on this journey where we started with the bear. Take care my friend, Dark Place

Mr. G

a pleasure to read, 4 months making the best choice a compulsive gambler can make.

To better there tomorrow with a great choice today.

No bet today.

With each days abstinence another brick is layed on that wall you build between you and that bet.

It does sit sulking, thinking of ways to try and tempt you to knock that wall down, but for all to see fella you keep adding bricks.

Keep laying them, fantastic !!!

Duncs stepping forward never back.

Hi all

Hope you're all having a good week and finding the necessary strength from within to keep abstaining from the gambling.

All good here. Been shopping constantly(one of my least favourite things) for the holiday in 3 weeks. Tess insisting we have some new clothes to go away with.

No urges at all. Really enjoying being an ex gambler. Can't go back to gambling again now. Not ever. Come too far now.

G

Hi G, i went back into my diary from 2012 and realised i had stopped on the 21st October but then relapsed on the 28th October ! of course i have been calculating the days from when i started on gamcare notwithstanding i actually gave up effectively on the 29th ! so a long story but there you have it my friend. Please let me know if you concur, after all you are my peer. Good to see you back, even if it is with lots of shopping bags 🙂 enjoy the rest of the week, you have been sorely missed by all. Dark Place

I think the days are irrelevant after a while just think not gambling is the only way forward well done g and dark place I'm finally joining in the party thanks for the harsh words a while ago 🙂

The bear

Fogot to say G, my kids are coming to stay with me for 3 weeks in May. I hope to get over to Finland before they come here but its looking increasingly tricky, Dark Place

G,

Pleased to hear you're still making good progress mate. I agree with what you say about 'coming too far'. The more we invest in our recovery - and the more time elapses - it feels a bit like there is more to lose.

I mus say that going shopping 3 weeks before a holiday seems a bit extreme! My Mrs always insists on starting the packing days, even weeks before departure. Like a lot of men, I'm most efficient getting my stuff ready at the last minute (i.e. half an hour before we leave)!

Anyway, well done mate. Keep up the good work

D123

Thanks for all the kind words guys. Bear great point about how irrelevant the days are now. It's all about months and years from now on. I will always remember I quit gambling 16th Nov 2012. That's all I ever need remember. The day I took back my life.

DP May will come soon enough so you can see the kids. 3 weeks will be great.

Wishing you all well.

G

I read your post at the beginning about you could only dream of 68 days free well your nearly twice that now enjoy the fruits of your labour

Sadg, your keeping a low profile my friend ? you must be just happy concentrating on the family and work, good for you my friend. Your long posts are sorely missed here, Dark Place /

Hey DarkPlace and all. DarkPlace this ones for you my friend

Well simple answer is yes I have been keeping a low profile but have had quite a bit to do in the last 3 weeks. As I said in previous post work has become increasingly busier and has occupied my time of late. I've also been hitting the gym hard before the holiday which amazingly is now only 12 days away.

I've used the gym as a really good distraction from gambling. I realise it's not for everyone but I figure if I spend 2 hours every day at the gym plus think about and plan my meals around it then I actually use up a lot of time in my day where previously I would have been sat at the pc(bored waiting to go to work) doing my brains to some sick twisted online betting site. This way I use up a chunk of my free time and hopefully gain fitness at the same time.

Can happily report that I have had no urges for a long time now. I just don't think about gambling anymore. It passes me by on a daily basis. Ironically before I quit back in November I had placed a season long accumulator bet on various football teams/top goalscorers. The bet is still active and although it doesn't look like it's going to come in there is still a slim hope. It would net me around 15K. I'm pretty sure it's as good as dead as one team is letting me down but I wonder how that would affect me if it came in. It certainly wouldn't drag me back to online casinos. That was my big vice and those days are well and truly over but I'd like to think it would be my reward for abstaining for so long. Would treat the family to something amazing. It is the last bet still running in my gambling life. I will never place another one. I consider even a small accumulator to be a betrayal of my promise never to gamble again.

Interesting thing happened last week. I was sitting in my front room with the laptop looking at this site, reading a few profiles. I thought my wife was asleep upstairs. I got this text from a mate. It required quite a long reply and as I was replying my wife came downstairs and over to me and sat on the sofa next to me. I was completely oblivious to the fact that I still had this site on the screen. I can't remember but I think I just had it on the recovery diaries main page. She must have read a few of the main titles whilst I was oblivious and still texting. She very calmly asked me why I was looking at this site and was I gambling. Without thinking I just said very honestly that I don't gamble any more and just come on this site every now and then for reassurance and that it's a site for ex-gamblers. I said I was just having a quick look. She said ok then went off to the kitchen. I played it cool but on the inside I was thinking 'wow that was a close one'. She still doesn't know about me posting on here and to be honest I'm in such a good place these days in lots of ways I don't care if she knows but I will always be ashamed of my losses from last year and if she read this thread she would see the damage I caused to us financially. I will always be haunted by what I could have done with that money and the fact it was borrowed money by way of loans which I now have to pay off over the next 5 years. I tell myself I'm protecting her from knowing the full extent of my gambling but if truth be told it's just pure shame on my part. It will never happen again. Never never never.

I hope you all have a great week. It's been nice to get back on here and write again. Been a while. Always makes me feel good.

Thanks to everyone for their continued support. Great to see Bear finally getting to grips with his addiction. You are all amazing people.

G