SadG wants to be happyG

Thank you for keeping up your diary and your posts in mine. I'm back and I'm counting and you continue to be a source of strength. Your holiday sounds amazing as is your progress in the fight against gambling. Px

Hello Sadg

Hope your holiday is going great ? i am sure it is. Hope you are back soon, everyone is missing you ! i am still gamble free and loving it, so is the bear. Dark Place

Hey everyone

Well I'm back after a fantastic holiday in the caribbean. Weather was just perfect, beaches beautiful and I had my family with me to enjoy it all. Very relaxing time and the tan isn't too bad.

Happy to say still very much gamble free after 5 1/2 months. The occasional thought pops into my head but other than that I have no urges. Gambling is just not part of my life any more. Still kicking myself over the money lost last year and being gamble free for so long now reminds me what a waste of life last year was for me.

Also being able to enjoy such a lovely holiday this last 2 weeks reminds me that I could have done so much more with that money I blew last year and in the years prior to that. I really hope to have more holidays like this. An addicted gambler is so in the zone and the moment they miss the big picture of how better that money can be spent. I made a promise to myself back in November to spend more time and money with my kids and I'm happy to say I'm doing that. It will take years to get over my losses of last year, if ever. It is always going to haunt me but acts as a guard against complacency now.

I will catch up with peoples diaries over the next couple of days and see how everyone is getting on.

I'm winning now because I chose to stop gambling.

Have a great weekend everyone. It's good to be back with my Gamcare family.

G

Hey SadG,

Welcome back from your trip, much congrats on your 5 1/2 months of abstinence. Keep at it, and enjoy your weekend.

Chicagoguy

Mr G

I reckon you are more than some way to being a Happy G my friend.

Why??

Because you did the best thing a compulsive gambler can do!!

ABSTAIN AND MAINTAIN.

For that keep enjoying what it gives you.

A great dose of living.

Well done fella

Duncs stepping forward never back

Makes me smile when I read your first entry 'don't I feel like s**t'.

Sounds like you feel on top of the world at the moment.

Hooray!!!

xxx

Had a great day with friends yesterday. 6 of us and 3 kids all went out for an excellent Sunday roast. Then off to the British Legion social club in our village for what turned in to a bit of an all-dayer. Kids were playing happily and us adults had such a laugh. Really enjoyable day with good friends.

Felt a wee bit fragile this morning but recovered now. Off to the gym this morning then time to give the car a good clean and cut the grass for the first time this year whilst the weather holds. All of it better and more productive than gambling. It's sunny but windy here. Have a good day all.

G

Mr G

My friend I love to see what recovery and the hard work you put in to it can delivery.

fella my hat goes off to you.

duncs stepping forward never back.

Hey, great to have you back my friend ! you have been sorely missed by everyone !

Seems your holiday was out of this world, you deserved it after all the strife and stress of this gambling addiction and of course your family did too. Seems they have their real father back and husband ! just like my children and wife does ! no more wating thousands of ££££ in an afternoon then complaining when your wife says the kids need new shoes 1/2 hour after you have kissed all that money away ! seems your weekend was spot on also, anyhow great to have you back G, welcome back to your second home. Dark Place

DP I remember those moments re my wife asking for money and me moaning about it having blown hundreds/thousands the day before and of course keeping it all secret. Dark days my friend, those were truly dark days. Never again. But I'm glad you mentioned it because it's thoughts like that that will keep me gamble free forever more I think. I just cannot go back to being that person. When I think back to what I was doing this time last year it is tragic.

I got a statement last week telling me I've paid off the first year of one of the loans I took out to feed my insane addiction. 3 more years to go to be free of it. My 3 loans total just short of £700 a month. It truly hurts me every month seeing my online statement and seeing the 3 loans all go out of my account today. £32K by the time they're all paid off. Insane!!

My flat needs a new kitchen desperately. It's looking old and tired but there's just no money spare to do it and won't be for another 3 years. That hurts. Losing money you have is one thing, losing money from loans means I'm paying for my addiction long after stopping but it serves as a brutal reminder.

DP you say you'll party after 1 year of being gamble free. That's nothing to the party I'll be having in 3 years when I finally rid myself of this debt. It'll be a party of epic proportions ha ha.

The main thing is that no matter how sick it makes me feel it is still my reminder how S***e my life was last year, how low I sank, how I betrayed my family to immeasurable levels, how I lost all self control of myself and how I saw the light and turned my life around. For that I have my Gamcare family to thank. You are wonderful people.

Time to hit the gym then it's work tonight. Have a great week everyone.

G

Hi G

Yes it is good to remember those dark moments, where we had turned into incredibly selfish beasts ! the devil himself submerged inside us ! but now we are heading into a new better life and state of mind ! i propose around mid November The Bear, me and yourself organise to meet in a bar in London and drink those cold beers and as each one goes down we toast to the end of our gambling diseases and its disaster that it has wreaked upon us !

What say ? Dark Place /

Hey SadG,

Thanks for the post my friend, glad your doing well, keep up all the hard work and enjoy recovery, it's really nice to reap the rewards of abstinence. Congrats on your outstanding accomplishment!

Chicagoguy

Thanks guys.

DP you're on. Great idea. I would gladly meet you and Bear and anyone else who'd like to join us. We are one family with one common goal and I'd happily buy you a cold beer and toast all our efforts, to shake the hands of the people who helped me get my life back. I owe you all so much.

I mentioned in a post to Duncan that gambling has given me nothing that I couldn't have got elsewhere. All it has done is taken from me. My money, self worth, family moments, pride, time and so the list goes on. Well nearly 6 months ago I decided it wasn't taking from me any more. Enough was enough.

I only hope those much younger reading this today can see the light sooner than I did. If you become addicted to gambling you have to fight you're way back to a normal life. It isn't easy. The addiction gets a hold of you, makes you think you can win back losses from previous days, makes you think you can cover the bills if you just win a few quid, makes you dream of winning 1000's in one day, makes you believe that you can change your life for the better and makes you think you can ease the boredom of your daily life. Wake up!!!

Don't be a mug like I was. I will gladly come to your house and slap you in the head if it would knock some sense in to you. All it will do is take from you. It is a stone cold heartless addiction. Gambling gods will not return your money. Not ever. They bank it and laugh at you. That's all they do period.

I am winning now because I choose NOT to gamble.

Hmmm ranted a bit there but makes me feel better and keeps complacency from setting in.

Have a nice evening my wonderful family. Best wishes.

G

Hi SadG,

Just got home and went to the diaries for a lift and some inspiration. Your post gave me both. Thank you!! -joanxxx

Your comments to Duncan are shrewd for sure, it is so right that all gambling does is take from your wallet, take from your family, take from your health, take from your soul, take from your pseronality, take, take, take take..... i was truly sick of it and i have gained the strength from this site. I remember those tempting moments and i just signed on here and it gave me strength and just for that weak moment, it allowed me to regain my compsure and mental state of mind. I am looking forward to those beers sadg, even if its just us 2 !

Well the sun is shining, so few beers after work tonight with my friends. Have a great weekend sadg, i am waiting for those beers Dark Place