The Past Was Yours But The Futures Mine

Payday always an anxious day but safely negotiated transferred my wage to my parents which continues to work well and left a little in to collect todays direct debits. Got some savings building up now and can afford to live comfortably and treat myself throughout the month which is great 🙂

When I first started posting I had 3 payday loans which I have now finally cleared 🙂 0 payday loans. NEVER AGAIN. NEVER AGAIN. thank f**k those disgusting things are paid off.

I also am down from 4 credit cards to 3

Onwards and upwards, just finishing work time to get my head down and study and of course no gambling.

A week without gambling today. Feel back on track.

Hi StoneRoses,

Sounds like you're back on the right track. Did you exclude frm the bookies you went to when you had your blip?

I self excluded for a year sometime in Feb last year, will have to dig out my exclusion form. Planning on revisting (with no cash on me) and self excluding again but this time for the max 5 years.

Honestly its the best thing you can do. Takes so much pressure off your shoulders.

Hey Sonic it was just a brief moment of madness I self excluded from the ones near where I live but got a taxi to this one it was my own fault I chose not to be arsed about my recovery, I have no plans to go back so think will leave the self exclusion as how many do you self exclude from although I see your point! I work in the city (2 hours commute) so there are always bookies on my travels which i've not bothered with.

It was complacency, stress had built up but i'm feeling good again and by end of feb/march will hopefully have just two debts to my name my overdraft and one credit card which would be a great feeling considering where I were.

No gambling today, uni then a weekend off going to drink until I can't see this weekend haha.

Hi Stone,

Good to read you are feeling good again, and a week of winning, is great to read.

Enjoy your boozy weekend, you deserve it.

Suzanne xx

Will do cheers Suzanne. Having lots of gambling thoughts today 🙁 hate it at times. Trying to stay strong.

Hi StoneRoses,

Just read your comment on the challenge - ditto! I had a few days like that last weekend, I felt very down about it all and as though it was inevitable that I would slip at some point 🙁 However, dusted myself down and am now ok again. Hope you are too!

Rach x

Hi
Stoneroses

I hear that justification all the time its a natural one to have, try to forget it ever happened pretend we no longer have a problem. Try to embrace your recovery, do something every day to strengthen it. Remembering what i did to myself whilst gambling remembering the person who i become while acting out my addiction is one of the strongest barriers i have in preventing relapse. I never want to be that person again, im sure you dont either

Thanks Rach 🙂

I am doing I am still gamble free, just if i'm not particularly thinking about gambling too much and come on here at times it triggers more thoughts and urges around gambling! If i do not post on here it doesn't mean I am not putting effort into my recovery 🙂

Treated myself to a night out last weekend and this and also some clothes. Debts are coming down. Job is hard work and so is uni but recovery going okay. It's a work in progress and it's tough at times.

Hi Stone, keep doing what is right for you & we are all alongside you 🙂 You are doing great coping with everything! Stay strong - ODAAT

been gambling on and off. no bets today. feel embarassed posting this as feel like letting people down and myself but here I am ready to give it another go. no gambling today incredibly stressed, mind feels battered! Relapsing is an absolute killer, really eats away at you and makes you feel so weak and low. It's harder to deal with a relapse than it is when you first decide enough is enough if that makes sense.

One day not gambling over with

Mate, don't feel embarrassed coming back...It's good to see you! Still time to knuckle down & get the grades you know you can get!

Well done on getting that 1st day back in the bank...You know where to go from here - ODAAT

I know just been little blips escaping the stresses of life not the right thing to do! just about to start my 10,000 word dissertation!

Just checking in on you to see how it's going? Trust that essay is coming along great? I'm counting on you remember 😉

haha not started it yet been unwinding from work and life for a few days, the hard work starts tomorrow and probably wont stop until end of april! 🙂 thanks for the continued support!