This time it's got to be the one

Your doing great, I know it's not easy x

Hope you have a lovely day 🙂

Thank you wai x

19 days still GF

Had a fantastic time with my family at the coast over the last few days and didnt think about gambling once.Also contacted by the second job i applied for over the weekend and i got it! Starting to feel more positive , things can hopefully only get better

Hope you all have a GF and kind Monday

Morning Annie , congratulations on 19 Days GF . Love your bubbly attitude and positive approach to recovery ... stephen

Thanks Stephen for your comments i always pop over to your diary and have a read you are very inspirational and honest ,i spent so much time feeling down about what i gambled away i tried a different approach and started being positive it really helps.

Well day 21 ,3 weeks GF and almost at my next hurdle. I will beat this.

Well done Annie I'm on day 10 got paid today and had many crazy thoughts of you know what but just read all your diary inputs and it's really helped so thanks for that and keep the good work up X

Thanks cartybhoy77 im so pleased my diary inputs have helped you. Well done on 10 days, its not an easy journey but take small steps and try to be kind to yourself too.

Checking in day 22 hope everyone is well and managing to stay gf

Annie x

Thanks for posting on my diary Annie . Congratulations on 23 Days GF and well done on your positive approach to recovery . Down to earth , practical and achievable goals . Great the way your replacing the addiction with more worthwhile pursuits . Putting the past behind you and getting your life back ....Wishing you every success ....stephen. x

Thanks Stephen x

Checking in day 25, had a nice weekend with my family and back to work tomorrow.

Had a few thoughts,not about gambling but how much ive lost not only financially but also in time tgat i could have spent doing nice family things, i will make this up to them over time and i will never let them down again.

Today i am gamble free, tiny steps make big strides.

Hello everyone

Checking in day 29.. ive made my hurdle! Next hurdle 42 days, my longest spell was 121 days then i relapsed in a massive way bigger than ever. I dont want to gamble ever again the thought of it makes me sick but im also terrified that what if i let my guard down and it happens. Ive been keeping busy with work and family, friend still has control of my finances which has really helped me. I didnt have any strategies in place before i thought i could control the urge and just quit but i was wrong, for me i do need these different things in place till i am recovered enough to take back control of my finances.

Hope everyone is having a GF week

Annie x

Hi Annie

Just stumbled upon your diary, nearly a month gamble free, nice work. Stay positive a life without gambling truly makes everyday better, even if it is difficult to see at first.

Go get yourself some councelling if possible? One thing I learned from my tortuous journey is we all gamble for a reason, it truly helped me talking to someone neutral and professional.You also have to tell yourself you can never win, EVER. The only way to win is to abstain and then enjoy the fruits of a gamble free life, both financial and personal.

Stay strong

Matt

Thank you for commenting on my diary Matt. I have had a read through yours too, well done your recovery is an amazing acheivement.

I have had counselling in the past not for gambling but for a bereavement which i think was the root cause of why i gambled and then as i got deeper in a mess it was always about chasing losses, i often speak to someone on the netline here which really helps.

Day 30 .....

These last few days have gone so quickly, i cant believe i have used the excuse as having too much time on my hands as another reason to gamble. When life is lived GF it is so fulfilling, i have saved so much money this month and we have even managed to book a family holiday for september.Even though i am in debt my family should not suffer so the holiday is a big thing,i am still managing to pay the debts off with no help, i wont take my husbands money as i got myself in this financial mess. Training starts for the second job beginning of september too, looking forward to earning some extra money and pay some debt off.Other than my standing orders and direct debits ive spent nothing but 40 pounds this month that my friend got out my account for me.To think i could spend 1000s in one gambling session now seems crazy.

Morning Annie and Congratulations . A month since you last gambled .

Your diary just goes to show how insidious this addiction is . A hard working intelligent lady , enjoying life with her loving friends and family . All of a sudden disaster strikes .

By chance and at a vunerable time , the gambling addiction entered your life and chaos became the norm . Took the addiction just 3 sad years to destroy your self respect and leave you shattered . It masqueraded as your friend and gave you a 4 month break before coming back with a cruel vengeance .

The good news is you have now recognised your vulnerability and taken positive steps to get your life back . Your insight and determination will get you through the challenging times that lay ahead .

Brilliant how your focussing your energies on productive aspects in your life , making positive plans , accepting whats done is done , looking forward . Feeling sadness and regret can assist your recovery , dragging them along like a ball and chain is a definite no no .

You seem to be going hammer and tongs at your recovery which is quite wonderful and great to see . Remember to be gentle with yourself . Many a time in the diaries people are advised to cut themselves some slack and not beat themselves up .

Take care Annie .... stephen x

Thank you so much for your post Stephen, you always seem to empower me with your words!

Checking in day 33 , had a busy weekend with the family, gambling seems to be going further from my thoughts however i never can become complacent again as the last relapse kicked me up the b**t when i least expected it.

This journey is not easy but i suppose its the choices we make on the journey that help us succeed in the end. If we fall 100 times we get back up 101 times. On my very early days posting someone told me to never give up on giving up and those are words i remember when i feel down, there will be and there is light at the end of the tunnel.

Morning Diary

Day 36 ... starting to feel that i may actually beat this, this time.Off to work busy busy day.i like keep busy i dont have any time to even think about gambling and i dont want to, gambling is the worse friend i ever had.

Keep strong everyone

Annie x

Day 36 Annie, over a month now! You are doing great, you can beat this. Enjoy keeping busy in the right ways 🙂 Keep going, your are doing fantastic. Also hope you are finding time for you, little things like learning to relax, having nice long bubble baths, watch that cheesy movie you've always wanted to watch, or read that book you've always wanted to, but just never got round to. Enjoy it x