In 2008 I was a compulsive gambler. Although I never lost a life changing amount it consumed my life. All I could think about was gambling.
I then managed to last 6 and half years without gambling and life was excellent. Actually living life and enjoying myself. Not thinking about gambling was amazing.
That was until yesterday when I lost about 3k in one day. I really thought I had beaten it. From 28 to 34 years of age I was happy. I am now worried I am slipping to my old habits again. My first goal is to last one year without gambling. I know the next month will be very hard as I will look to chase my losses. However I need to accept the money is gone. It is a long road and it starts with accepting I am a gambling addict.
Hi Never,
Between 28-34 gambling totally destroyed my life, slowly but surely. Losses were initially sustainable, but over the last two years I've taken out loans, payday loans and defaulted on credit agreements to keep trying to recoup my losses.
I like you am 34 and today like you I am embarking on the same journey. Good luck and I look forward to reading about your progress. I too have started a diary if you want to follow my journey.
All the best
Charlie
One week down - no gambling yet. Still have my demons telling me to chase back my losses. So far, resisting temptation.
Hi Never,
Well done on reaching that first week without gambling.
Try not to listen to them demons trying to get you back in to gambling. Listen to your own advice from your first post....."I need to accept that the money is gone"...... That has to be at the forefront of your thinking each day. You don't want to make your losses even greater, because believe me, that's what will happen....and you will be really kicking yourself then.
Look on the positive side. You managed 6 and a half years without gambling - that is a magnificent achievement in my eyes. In 2008 I was 39, and I joined this recovery diary section. Since then I have flitted in and out of gambling, recovery, gambling, recovery and in the process lost thousands of pounds from stupidly thinking it would be different each time i went back..... truth is, now at the age of 45 I know that's what's gone ain't coming back.
If I could go back and talk to my 34 year old self for a day. I'd tell him to stay the f**k away from gambling. It's pure evil, if like us you have a compulsive nature.
Keep strong and keep posting your journey...
All the best
Ade
Just an update. Have so far managed to avoid gambling although the temptation is still there but not as strong as it was. I just tell myself it is not worth the pain. Good luck to others in this fight
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