Is it possible for a CG to 'control' their gambling?

Hi

For me the addictions and obsessions were just a way of me escaping in my fears.

For me the addictions and obsessions just indicated how emotionally vulnerable I was.

Only once I was abale to abstain from unhealthy habits could I get to understand why I had addictions and obsessions.

Many times it was proven that a person would abstain from one unhealthy habit then switch then switch to another unhealthy habit.

Often from Gambling to drinking.

For me the abstaining from all addictions and obsessions was the point I could start to heal the hurt inner child in me.

My job was on the road.

After me abstaining from all addictions and obsessions I found that I had lots of anxietys frsutrations and fears.

It was then that I got to question how do you stop lying and living in fears.

When asked how I was did I say I was fine when that was not true.

Often the question how are you was not so much a question they saw and felt that I was troubled.

Saying I was fine I was lying to my self.

Only once I asbtained from all unhealthy habits was the point I replaced unhealthy habits with healthy habits.

Often meetinsg caused more questions than answers.

The therapies were a big help in finding new paths in my recovery.

Some might even think that once we abstain from unhealthy habits that our life becomes much easier.

Not so but as we get more and more tested wee do not react in such unhealthy ways.

My anxietys were reduced, my stress levels were reduced, my anger was reduced, my patience and tolerence were drastically improved.

Yes for me recovery and healing of my hurt inner child could only happen once I was no reacting in such unhealthy ways.

I have invested alife time in the recovery program.

A person once said at a meeting he was glad that he was a compulsive gambler.

With out his recovery program he would ahve never found out how unhealthy he was and also would nto have found out how much he was missing from his life.

Reduced fears increased trust, more honesty and more intimacy in his life with all people.

I have taken up the healthy habit of writing down my needs my wants and my goals.  

For me writing down my needs my wants and my goals is amy commitment to my self and a much healthier self sufficient life.

Dave L

AKA Dave of Beckenham

Hi

For me my addictions and obsessions just indicated that I was emotionally vulnerable.

Because I was emotionally vulnerable did not mean that I was weak exactly the opposite I am and was a survivor and have been through some horrific painful events in my life.

The addictions and obsessions just indicated that I had a hurt inner child who was not able to abstain from my addictions and obsessions.

The addictions and obsessions was just my way of escaping my feelings and emotions and run away in my fears.

Was I aware of how vulnerable I was.

Not at all I use to put on a facade and live in fear becuse my inner child did not want to be hurt any more.

For me my past traumas and pains caused fears in me that I did not understand.

Only once I was able to abstain from my addictions and obsessions could I even start to heal the hurt inner in me.

For me the recovery program is about healing the hurt inner child in me and that was not possible if I was still causing my self pains and trauma being active in my own self abuse.

For me the recovery program really kicked in when my therapies got to a deeper place.

It may even seem strange that after  so much suffering I could be completely honest with the people in the recovery meeting.

After some time my therapies got deeper and I was abale to learn how to articulate what my feelings and emotions were.

Then after time therapies got to the point we could talk about any thing.

After time our therapies got to the point where we were all laughing and having fun.

Our therapies were no longer stressful but very much enlightening and our trust grew more and more.

This kind of relationship led to a healthy intimacy inside the rooms and out side.

For me healthy intimacy was also helping in my healing.

In time I did not fear exposing so much of my self.

The addictions and obsessions just indicated how much fear I lived in, just indicated how much I use to go in to panick mode.

The hurt inner child is still healing today.

The recovery program not only helped me heal but also made me aware of how much was missing in my life today.

I am able to tell my family I love them and that I am very proud of them.

I am able to express my gratitude and appreciation to all people.

Today I am able to become the healthiest person I can be today.

Each time I went back to my addictions and obsessions indicated that I had no dealt with those certain emotional triggers yet.

I am a non religious person.

The recovery program has helped me understand that if a person can reach higher golas so can I.

Love healing and peace to every one.

Dave L

AKA Dave of Beckenham

Hi

For me the addictions and obsessions were an unhealthy way for me to try and escape certain emotional triggers.

When I gambled I was often on an adrenaline rush which was very much fear based issues.

I am a non religious person.

I now understand that I could find a much healthier life with out my addictions and obsessions and make much healthier choices.

Before my recovery I use to react in unhealthy ways to my angers, I use to react in unhealthy ways to my pains, I use to react in unhealthy ways to my fears.

Now I understand that my addictions and obsessions indicated that I had certain emotional triggers.

Being in the recovery I would learn to abstain from my unhealthy addictions and obsessions. 

Being in the recovery I would learn to heal my pains.

Being in the recovery I would learn to feace adn reduce my fears.

Being in the recovery I would learn to reduce my expectations of people life and situations.

Being in the recovery I would learn to accet the simple fact I could not change my past unhealthy habits.

I use to lie because I lived in high levels of fears and anxiety.

Because of my high high levels of fears I would go in to panick mode where I would be unable to think things out clearly.

Pains earlier in my life caused me to live in so many fears.

I use to fear being honest.

I use to fear being questioned.

I use to fear rejection and abandonment.

I use to fear being accountable.

Through the recovery meetings and therapies my fears would reduce and I could articulate my feelings and my emotions.

In time I would move on from abstaining from addictions and obsessions and start to heal the hurt inner child in me.

I suffered in so many ways in my child hood.

It was important to heal my pains and coming out of the emotional trauma I use to bury and supress.

In the recovery meetings and therapies I would find my self laughing in so many ways.

The question is did I ever think I would laugh at my self.

In time I would understand that my addictions and obsessions only indicated how emotionally vulnerable I use to be.

How ever far we come in our recovery that on seeing and hearing therapies we understand where we came from but more importantly we can see and live a future life free of our unhealthy reactions.

For me the recovery program is not about who is right or wrong but more about what is healthy or unhealthy.

I have been in recovery since 1971.

I have been clean in my recovery since 1992.

I question why it took me so long over 20 years to understand that recovery was all about healing the hurt inner child in me.

Yet how many times when questioned how I was I would say I was fine or not so bad, was that the truth.

How many times did I think that if I got back the money I had lost would make things better and heal my pains.

I am an open book in my recovery.

I am seriously a survivor. of every thing that was unhealthy in my life.

I am able to set boudaries and have a voice from a place of peace.

How much time and effort was I willing to invest in to my becoming a much healthier healed person.

Healing love and peace to every one.

Dave L

AKA Dave of Beckenham.