He really doesn’t care he’s lost his family

Hi so just following on from my last post. My partner of 20yrs together told me I was nagging him because I asked him to get more counselling and support. ( he stopped jan 22 but has relapsed every 4:5 months since and lied about it so clearly needs more support) he told me it was over and we were done because on my nagging.. I asked him to leave the family home with have two older boys still at home  and he has now got himself a spare room and is moving 1st may  . He is singing eating cooking sleeping and generally seems to have accepted it without a care in the world . I however, am devastated ( although I know it’s for the best ) I have been diagnosed with ptsd and depression because of this constant sickening rollercoaster of a warped relationship. (Constant lies cheating  gaslighting) then tells me I’m crazy.. I’m hard to live with .. I nag and yet all I ever wanted was a loving truthful relationship with no drama and lies. He’s never been a good communicator and I’m sure he has autism..( likes routines no empathy never gets emotional..takes everything literally )I found a lump in my breast and all I got was oh I’m sorry to hear that?!? 
he asked if I wanted him to come to the appointment but because of the way he broke up with me and seemed happy to leave his family I sed no. I drove to the hospital this morning on my own scared and also I only passed my test in December so quite a daunting day He went to work as normal and when I told him how much it hurt he sed well you didn’t want me there! He didn’t put up much of a fight though…but he never does he is so black n white and happy to leave it. I’m just so low that I’ve wasted so much of my life with this cold horrible man. He is so cold and has accepted it without a second glance. I’m now having to deal with the worry of cancer. Why haven’t I seen how vile and destructive this relationship was? I’ve been so stupid staying thinking I could help him . I’m broken .