Hi I think I understand your pain.I still can't understand how that could happen to me as well.seeing your post I can see that I'm not alone.I wish you to be strong as I still believe that family needs to be together and I hope time will take the pain away.
Thankyou all for your help!
My "husband" is currently locked up and won't be out until this afternoon, well that's what the police informed me who banged me out of bed at 4 am after id had half an hours sleep from worry as his fone was off. He went Awol from work at 9am been gambling then got drunk and possibly on drugs.. He doesn't normally do either! I'm so angry. Why do I have to suffer all the time when I've done nothing but sit at home looking after his children. He's making me ill.
I was advised by my counsellor that I can't see her again for 6 months and I wasn't allowed to pay her privately to keep the sessions which I was gutted about as we'd built a bond and starting over will be exhausting.
I hope everyone's morning is at least slightly better than mine. I'm dreading the unknown and I have no idea where my car has been left? The kids have had to walk to school with my brother as the pram is also in the car and my youngest wouldn't walk so far. I'm so angry at the whole world right now but im keeping it together for them the best I can.
Divorce shopping will commence in the near future! Get me out of it!
Gem x
Can't think of anything to usefully say other than look after yourself.
CW
Hi,
A horrible predicament you find yourself in. I wish you all the best in whatever decision you make.
Best wishes
Thankyou both.
He on bail and i've told him he can't stay here with me and the kids. I'm done. He smashed up a bookies and my car! I'm done. He currently at the hospital getting his hand seen to i think. They had better hurry up and fix it because he's got some suitcases to carry.
The end is near and im dragging myself there and never looking back.
Gem x
How are you today?
CW
Hi Cw,
I'm ok today. I don't think everything has hit me yet, I haven't cried and feel all out of emotions. He came by yesterday to give me back my key etc and it took all my strength not to feel sorry for him stood there with his puppy dog eyes on and his arm in a pot (he's broken his arm when he went on his bender) He's staying at his mum's. I need to be strong this time. I have to doctors at 9am tomorrow for my anxiety. It took me nearly 20 minutes to leave the house to walk 5 minutes to my brothers, I need to get help with it.
I hope you are well!
Gem x
Hi Gem,
Stay strong, how are things now?
Hi Katie,
I'm ok, coping the best I can for the kids. I went to the doctors and explained I can't eat or sleep and my anxiety is through the roof. He just said I was stressed from what's going on right now. I explained it's been a long time now but he was no use other than saying he'd put me on a waiting list to see someone. Useless. He's still at his mum's and that's where he will stay. He barely sees the kids which makes me angry because of course they notice he is missing. He's called today just to get some clothes and kept saying how everything is my fault. I refuse to snap. I can do this!
I hope you have been ok?
Gem x
When actively gambling they always blame everyone but themselves. Take no notice.
The kids may miss him now but long term they'll remember which parent was there for them to rely on when they were growing up. You're doing great.
Would you consider GamAnon? Babysitting may be an issue but if you can get to a meeting there's immediate support.
Take care.
CW
Hi CW,
Thankyou for your reply. I wouldn't be able to go to gam anon as I have the kids constantly and I also don't think i could speak up in a group with my anxiety.
I've just been woken up its 2am to more news that he's been on a bender again and i've had to sort people to find him. He's been fighting and all sorts. His mum managed to find him and when she took him home he's relentlessly txt and called me to say he's fighting me for our children and calling me every name under the sun. I'm just tired and mentally drained. Every single time he just bullies me down to take him back. Do you think I should seek a solicitor?
Gem x
Hi Gem so sorry to hear that you have hit rock bottom, but u are stronger than u will even realise at this moment, I do think you need to seek legal advice, they always blame others as they can't admit who and what they have become and done, you must continue to be strong and your kinds will thank you one day, and don't break with his threats cause that's what they are he is hurting deep down and he wants you to hurt. Thinking about you wish I could help with babysitting, have you any close friends that could help? You need some support around you but u will get through this Gem I am sure of this. Take care your not alone.x
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