Any help welcome

Hi there, well breaking your fingers and hurting yourself certainly isn’t the answer, so forget that right away! I’m someone who has just went from being up thousands to being down to nothing.  It really is a horrible feeling when things go wrong.  

The thing with addiction is, deep down you still want to gamble, even though you may gamble in a way that is harmful. 

In order to break the cycle, you must subconsciously practice seeing yourself as a non-gambler. Act as if you’ve never gambled before. Keep doing this as much as you can and eventually you’ll find that your interest in gambling will weaken over time. However this isn’t a quick or easy process, lots of patience and conscious effort is needed. 

Relapsing isn’t such a bad thing because it’s proof you’re trying to do what you can and it can take a lot of attempts to reach success. 

In my opinion, you should maybe not try stop dead right away, slowly reduce the bet size and frequency of your play (once again incredibly difficult but possible) and over time you might even find joy that you’re able to gamble in a way that is fun, and you can accept losing and you don’t want to go ALL IN every time you lose.  But if you feel that you want to stop completely, keep at it and you will get there in the end! Lots of support and lovely people on here.

All the best! It will all be okay! 

Hi SM.

As you are beginning to realise gambling is not about a rational decision to do it or not. It acts like a drug addiction and the hook or craving is in the act of gambling.

What doors have you left open to gamble? This may sound patronising or obvious to your addicted mindset but you need to shut that door and have loved ones and people close giving you the moral support to do that.

Your money needs protecting. Its no good in your pocket is it now? If that sounds awkward you may actually not be ready to stop

You need a period of abstention or cold turkey when you just cant find any way to gamble without others knowing. What I mean is you cant gamble because you have no access your money beyond a small allowance.

Time... location... money is the triangle. Money is a strong one to break with all the help you can get. I would know whether you had been gambling because your allowance would be for food or petrol for example with receipts provided.

You have to give the blocks everything you have got...money can be transferred to you fairly quickly (BUT NOT WITHOUT QUESTION) and if you need clothes you clear it and provide evidence.

Nothing is awkward compared to an addiction which is destroying you. Do you understand that

You need both the fear and respect for this addiction to change your mindset. You need to step things up and let us know what you plan to do

Nothing changes if nothing changes. The addiction controls you now and it doesnt want to let you free. You need to learn and try to understand what you are dealing with....You are not currently in control of your own mind and that should scare you enough to reach out for all the help you can get

Best wishes for a gamble free life

Hi Gluhve and joydivider 

Sorry it took me so long to get back to you too i decided to take a break from all forms of social media and my phone as a detox day. 

I really appreciate what you to had to say and i will take everything you said with me. I have created a stop gambling dairy and as far as one days go yesterday was quite a good day i wrote down all my thoughts and feelings and will start keeping track of my journey. I will learn helpful tips and tricks from this website and all the incredible users of it and look forward to a happy and gamble free life which i know i can achieve but also know that it will not be an easy journey. 

I was emotional with myself when i wrote my original message and didnt mean about the self harm and really apologise for that statement. 

Thanks again Guys and i look forward to hearing more stories

SM x 

Thanks SM  I dont want to sound harsh or too tough on you but its about picking up the phone and telling a non gambler in your family what you have been up to 

You need the big measures to face reality. My father thinks slot machines are the devil. He would never go near them so telling him was not particularly easy.

However I knew the addiction was killing me so nothing was awkward compared to that. I stumbled over my words because it never comes out as planned but the main thing is I got the words out.

That stopped financial trust and the money they had been wasting by giving it to me....so it protected their money more than anything...so it actually helped protect them.

So as long as you realise that this is not fully about willpower and writing diaries. I needed help...shock tactics and heavy reality to start me on a period of cold turkey.

Then the mind can heal if you are truly ready. It goes in stages and yes when I first started recovery I would watch people gambling on videos...that could be called the rattling during cold turkey

However in short time I had no more interest in that whatsoever. I hate gambling now but I have to remain calm and let the past go

However I can never be complacent again for the rest of my life.

Best wishes for a gamble free life

Cheers Joydivider

I feel im at the point now where harsh reality could be a way forward i have hurt loved ones in the past in regards to gambling and have told them for years that i was in control of it when i really wasnt. Telling ones again could be very very difficult and to be honest its something i want to avoid. I have got myself in this position alone so I want to get out of it. 

I have always tried to train the mind into stopping but that isnt a way at all so writing things down such a budgets, to do lists and working out expenditure will hopefully be beneficial. Im currently waiting very impatiently until my next pay day so in some ways its the perfect way to start things can only get better from here and once im paid next i can start fresh in learning the value of money. I can try it for a week then if i see myself spiralling i will take the scary jump of telling loved ones 

I also must say i really do respect your words and can imagine how hard it was for you to confide in loved ones and you should be very proud of your journey. im one day Gamble Free and its a start 

Thanks again Pal