Bad news today

...........

I do that all the time, self exclude, then when I'm suffering high anxiety, I find my way on to a new site and start it all again, playing all the way through the night and going through packs of diet coke and coffee. I have alot of other problems going on and alot of anxiety, so It's way too easy to go back and seek the temporary high from gambling. I wouldn't beat yourself up about it, it's not easy at all. I went to the doctors, and ended up going on anti anxiety meds which I loathed to do, they kind of work, but I still found my back to the Roullette. As soon as I had access to all my cards again, it was too big a temptation. I've locked them in a draw again, and ordered replacements so I don't know the security codes off by heart. Gambling has just added to much to my other problems, even though while I was in the moment I got the incredible rush of Dopamine. Once I win, I just want to be in the action all the time.

It's probably better that you lost, but that you didn't lose too much as you said. Try not to worry about your job, what will happen will happen, you might keep it, or you might find a better job. The stress and anxiety is the most debilitating thing though, and it takes over everything. I got to the point where I couldn't even concentrate watching a movie, cos I was in a constant state of worry and and anxiety. Couldn't concentrate for 5 minutes on anything.

I've even considered taking up meditation or something. Hopefully the counselling will help.

Thanks for the replies. I have my counselling this afternoon (I think it's an assessment rather than the first proper counselling session) ... I'll hopefully feel better once I've seen someone and talked things through.

How did the counselling go?

It went quite well, the counsellor was basically asking me details about my background, my family and my gambling habits etc, she filled in several forms. I now go on a waiting list to have one to one counselling (roughly a 3 week wait).

Thanks for asking.

Hi BowWow,

I can very much relate to stress and emotional gambling. It is not until you come out of the bubble that you see the gambling as a symptom of something else going on. Many times when i was back in the loop of gambling i suddenly lost big because something happened to me which either upset me or produced alot of anxiety in me, the i dont care about anything attitude . It was this trigger which i had no control of but i need to going forward recognise these, it was after all another trigger which started me gambling again. Well done for getting to councilling, its a great step just going there.

This is what scares me, I honestly can't see what makes me gamble, there's nothing at all I can think of. Suppose we are all different.

It is different for us all i think. We each have different triggers. I worry that i could get that out of control, but try to do as i am and draw a line under it now and take it as a lesson all be it painful and try to move on. I am struggling with it but know its the right thing to do. I did the councelling sessions and they worked very well i spent 9 months completely clear of gambling and cleared my debts. I simply got complacent after all my hard work but if you are willing to put the effort in the rewards are very good i was healthy happy and really doing very well its a place im now aiming to return to. Keep the triangle Money-Time-Place broken.

Spent half hour onto the helpline tonight, lad was brill with me, really helpful.

Just as this forum has

Thanks to you all