I have recently found out the true extent of my husbands gambling. There's loads of debt and his car has been repossessed. I am well and truly guttered. I have read some other posts and I have put a financial plan in place to have his money paid into my account (still awaiting his first pay since this tho & won't believe it until I see it). I know I need to safeguard myself and the children and I have got a CAB appointment in a couple of weeks to discuss this further. The last thing I want to do it break up the family but I can't lift myself up this time (currently off work). This is the third time I have been told I now know everything. But I am reluctant to believe what he says. I said the first time I would support him as long as he tells the truth. The second time I said it was his final chance. We are now on the third. If i had somewhere to go I honestly think I would go, but my credit rating has shot it (thanks to him) and we would need to sell up and then possibly move areas and I am worried about the impact of this on the kids. Another reason I want to move it due to the humiliation of the car being taken. Any advice of what else I can do? I need to get some control back of my life.
Hi @Lily20,
Sorry to hear he's relapsed again.  Did you ever take financial control to help prevent him from gambling? Gamblers need someone managing or overlooking their finances so that it's difficult for them to gamble again and f they're back to it, can be picked up as early as possible. I've learned from the others here that all financial transactions must be transparent and you need to have access to his bank accounts and credit reports.
I wish you and him all the best.
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Thank you for your response. Unfortunately I didn't know until last week that the debt was due to gambling (he previously didn't get paid for a job so assumed it was due to this). As soon as I found out I sorted things out financially but then his car was repossessed. So everything feels up in the air ?
Don't believe a word he says without seeing independent proof. Don't give him access to the family finances including savings or kids accounts.
The debt is his mess. Leave him to sort out what to do about it. Protect yourself and the chidren from any further damage as a priority then find some support for you.
Agree about not believing.
the unpaid job was most likely paid in cash but this formed a perfect lie
we lie and lie and lie.
protect yourself and take control of all finances
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Hey
I'm the wife of my husband and I was a compulsive gambler. I lied took multiple loans built up 20k of debt over ten years.  Im amazed he's still with me!Â
He needs to want to quit for him. With me one day I was broke had nothing. It was that morning something clicked in me. He's asked me to quit before but the difference is I never wanted too.
I enrolled on gamstop etc and internet controls are with him.Â
The last 167 days are the happiest I've been out of last ten years
I've had a course of CBT that was eye opening and my urges are now non existent for last month.
Good luck xx don't give up xx
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