Once more - relapsed

Hi

I like many people did not think that recovery would work for me.

Emotional triggers for me my were pains I could not heal, an emotional trigger were my were fears I could not face and reduce, an emotional trigger were my unreasonable expectations of people life and situations I could reduce, an emotional trigger were my fears of emotional intimacy and feeling a loner and disconnected, an emotional trigger for me was boredom because I could feel productive and I was not able to commit to my needs my wants and in time set goals for me to achieve.

Yet I am a much healthier spiritual person by not reacting in such unhealthy ways.

Each time I went back to gambling was a lesson I could learn from if I wanted to.

No matter when your last bet was keep going to meetings.

I lost more money than I like to think about.

Yet once I took recovery seriously I no longer wanted or need to gamble that day.

We are not stupid people we are just emotionally vulnerable people with certain emotional triggers.

Being angry is due to pains we are living in today.

I agree with you the most important thing is to understand why we gamble, understand our unhealthy reactions.

And more importantly how to overcome this unhealthy addiction.

Love to all!

Dave L

I believe pain is the cause of addiction. We use gambling as a way to escape pain. We experience pain when we don’t get our needs met. A happy person likely gets more needs met and, therefore, experiences less pain,happy person is more resistant to addiction because he/she has fewer reasons to escape.

By working on the underlying causes of the addiction, you’ll gradually remove sources of pain and become happier. When you reduce the pain in your life, you’ll probably see the urge to gamble disappear as well!

@q86r2ugj5p Thank you for your reply Dave, it is appreciated. We can all do it, like you do it, and keep strong!

@wbr9jcpn3y Hi JohhnyUk, thank you for your response. Pain, boredom, loneliness, any negative feeling and lack of motivation can lead to gambling in my opinion, as it "fills the gap". Working on these negative feelings can help us avoid gambling for good, otherwise it is a vicious cycle.

I relapsed after I came off sense, I was advised that 6 months may not be long enough. When it expired I went back to casino, I was given a 24 hour cooling off period and limited to 2 visits a week. When I went back in it could be seen that I was again showing signs of problem gambling, the manager advised that it was up to the operator if they allow anyone in after a self exclusion and he was seeing an issue, he asked me to leave. He said I had reached my deposit limit anyway and that if I went out and withdrew money and came back I wouldn’t be allowed in due to behaviours indicating I had a problem. He said he would be in touch to discuss weather it would be a permanent exclusion after a cooling off period.

i then went to another casino to chase the loss, they didn’t allow me in as they couldn’t prove of I had already been in twice that week in a different casino as per coming off sense. 

I was self excluded from grosvenor casinos directly aswel for 5 years separately from sense.  they still allowed me in and this particular branch said to sign a disclaimer, I spent all night in there, spending over 1500 then once my limit was reached, they even gave me directions to a cash machine. 

that was when the hole was well and truly dug. I knew what was coming, the same day I went back in after going home and trying to sleep, again lost around 1500 and I was still in there 10 hours later.

I went back onto sense and then relapsed once the gamstop had expired. I then went online and won some money,  felt relieved said I’d get it up to 4k and then go back onto gamstop. That didn’t happen I managed to deposit another 1300 and losing it. When I tried to deposit more  the online casino operator I was using restricted my account. They saw that there was in issue, and said the restriction was permanent and it could be appealed. This was procedure as they were following the GC guidelines. 

I then went onto w**********l, 5k in the space of 3 hours. They then sent me a bonus so i deposit more. That was it. 

10k in a week, all hopes and dreams shattered and back to square one at exactly the same time as last year. 

hopefully it will get easier. Trying to take it one day at a time 

Hello best thing you ever done is lose the 24 Grand we don't learn if we win. Let that be a Lesson

 to you, I hope you never do it again. If you carry on Gambling you will lose more than £ 24 Grand, you can lose your health and family. Gambling is NO Good  best wishes I hope you stop

@ypqtfao731 Hi Johnny57,  indeed mate, every time I said I ll stop this amount ofc was less.. i remember back in 2018 (when i started being a problem gambler) I realised I had lost in total 2k and was shocked.. nearly 7 years later this amount is much higher and it stops here... it s never late to stop, it s always a mistake to start again!!

@0bhkl8iz3g Hi ace, thanks for sharing this here, make sure you seek additional help please. I know it s hard, but you need to look ahead instead of looking back at the losses. As of when it's time, I would say, once a problem gambler always a problem gambler. We can't gamble for fun, therefore we need to stay away from it. take care