Can't stop until I get my money back

Not sure if this is a wind up or not about the 1.50 newmarket . Hope not cos this sites no place for joking about

I ain't joking I lost.

Just got another payday loan and blew the lot on roulette. Not being accepted for anymore. Guess this is the end of the rope. Not sure what to do. Thinking of running away. I'm too old for this nonsense. I will finish this vodka and hope to die in the night. I love my little boy. Why can't I be normal? Why can't I give him a good start. Why am I such a LOSER!

No answers here for me. If I wasn't a dad I would end my life.

Nobody cares about this. One comment. Telling me I'm joking. Someone needs to help me. I need help. What can I do? I need treatment or something. I just don't know what to do!!!

All these payday loans and I don't even have a job. I have strong guilt about my little boy. He's sleeping now happy. I bought this vodka when I was up about 1200. I was happy then. By the time the bottle finished 48 hours later in about 2 shots time. I had lost over £3000. Not much for some people but for me it was everything I had and more. I was going to buy a van. Thrown that new van away now. Please someone tell me where I can get some sort of help. Is it a mental problem? Can I commit myself to hospital. I need a line in the sand. I need to change this. Please someone tell me how they got away from this lifestyle.

So it's Micheal Watson. All the best people. Don't be a loser like me. Get out while you are still young. I'm gone - another casualty - another life wasted. I lost every woman I loved because of gambling. I can't quit. I have tried so many times. It would be more beneficial to the ones I love. If I wasn't around. I have to go now. I doubt anyone will make a fuss for a wretch like me. Hopefully my son won't remember what a screw up basket case loser his daddy was. Peace love. Don't gamble you fools. Out.

STORAGEHUNTER,

Hi, I just now saw all of these, I really really hope you are okay!! It’s such a hard thing to have to deal with, but I do agree that you definitely need help! Start here! You can talk to someone free on the phone!

I spoke to nice woman on the phone for nearly an hour but hasn't changed anything. Im still screwed. I have decided too keep everything to myself and try and work my way out of this situation. I think having a voice at the end of the phone helped me. Because I do feel more positive now. I've got ВЈ20 to my name. Actually I owe thousands so that's nonsense. I'm not gambling that £20 I'm not spending it on weed to help me forget. I'm spending it on a pitch at the carboot at the weekend. I would love to go residential for 3 months and get proper counciling but need to look after my boy. I will have to stay strong and keep trying always to do the right thing. I'm going to build a fantastic life for myself and my boy. I have to try.

Hi Storage Hunter . I’m sorry you are feeling beaten by your addiction at the moment . No one said it is going to be easy . It looks like you have hit your rock bottom moment and you have come through the other side . You are still here to tell the tale and for that you should see this as a fresh opportunity . Everyone has war wounds and battle scars most of it mental . It boils down right now to a signpost for you . Take care one route or the other route . You seem to have a self destruct button like every single one of us here . It will get easier day by day when you distance yourself from the gambling . It hasn’t really worked for any of us in our life hence coming to this site . You see we can’t win. Not ever. Maybe small wins but at what cost ? It isn’t all about the money you know that . It’s hurting people around us , loved ones . We don’t mean to but it’s a biproduct of our addiction . We start out meaning to be good honest decent people but we get consumed by gambling to the point of nothing else matters . In a short space of time if you are committed to stopping life significantly improves . I have said before on here to give this 3 months . Follow the advice . Self exclude . Hand control of your money over to someone close to you . Occupy your time with something more productive . Make it a habit not to gamble where normally it is . After those 3 months you will be no worse off than you are now but given it a good go and will hopefully see the benefits of stopping . You sleep better , you don’t worry as much , you don’t have to lie to others or even yourself . You can do this !

Bryan...I just want to say...I dont know what you do for a living but if you ever think of a caree change I think you have found your calling! I have only been on this site a short time and any time I see a response from you I am compelled to read it. You always offer the right balance between 'reality check' and and encouragment and support etc. I suppose you are coming from a great place in that you are only too familiar with this addiction process (unfortunately!)...you cant beat living the experience so to speak. So thank you...your responses help me alot. I am filled with positivity when I read your replys and the attitude that I can beat this if I follow the advice etc.Sorry to hi jack the thread of someone else but Im not sure theres a way to message you seperately without starting a new thread. We need more people like you Bryan...I find you a great councellor.Thank you 🙂

[quote=blueteam]

Thanks Cheers for the post Phil. And it's Everton I'm afraid lol.

Thanks for the advise there Phil, your completely right, I need do need to take them steps. Duno what is wrong with my head but I'm finding it really hard to right it off this time around. I haven't really been going bookies all online ATM, mainly is. Maybe sell my iPhone and get a basic phone which may help. I get paid tomorrow and really not looking forward to it, I'm saying to myself u win it back and never gamble again. The amount of times I have said this. And in regards to enjoying football matches, all I think now is oh I could of won that, and it's getting bludy out of hand because I'm even looking at how many corners and cards are in matchs. And when not betting on that I'm like oh I would of easily got that. If u get what I mean my head is completely ruined.

Do yourself a favour, self exclude yourself NOW, it takes a couple of minutes and takes away all the opportunity to chase bets and that’s when you bet without using your head. Don’t sell your iPhone, no need. You will feel your mood and life change when you self exclude. Forgot the money you’ve lost, it’s gone! I didn’t want to self exclude because I loved betting but I also hated it. Now I go to the bookies on a sat morning a put a £10 bet on, if I lose then whocares it’s a tenner. Rather than a grand lost.

Your wife and kids need you to provide and be a happy person so you all go through life as a happy family that will stay together. Keep betting and you’ll end up in debt, with no family and no house. Just shape up fella and self exclude... trust me, I’m 2 months in and literally changed my life.

STORAGEHUNTER wrote: I spoke to nice woman on the phone for nearly an hour but hasn't changed anything. Im still screwed. I have decided too keep everything to myself and try and work my way out of this situation. I think having a voice at the end of the phone helped me. Because I do feel more positive now. I've got ВЈ20 to my name. Actually I owe thousands so that's nonsense. I'm not gambling that £20 I'm not spending it on weed to help me forget. I'm spending it on a pitch at the carboot at the weekend. I would love to go residential for 3 months and get proper counciling but need to look after my boy. I will have to stay strong and keep trying always to do the right thing. I'm going to build a fantastic life for myself and my boy. I have to try.

Hello hunni
Set up a recovery diary, anytime you get frantic ring the helpline. Keep adding to the diary daily, even if it's to just share how your day as been, or a funny moment with your son. Ask for help I.e a counselor for GA.
Count your blessings every day and I hope life gets better. Read the recovery dairies.

Goodnight
Bella xx