Today I had to tell my wonderful husband that we are 14k euros in debt, mostly in overdraft, due to my problem. Miraculously he has not left me, this is the third time I have caused us financial difficulties but the others were relatively small. He is of course very angry and hurt, and we both have done a lot of crying today. Tonight I have to call my 67 year old mother to ask for money, God help me. At least I am not deluding myself anymore that I can play again and win this back. It is a start.
Hi Key d
Three weeks ago, I had to come clean to my wife about the debt that I had got into as a result of gambling.
My advice to you is contact your creditors about your problem and set up repayment plans. Talk them through your household income and priority bills, mortgage/rent, food, electric, gas, clothing and so on. Agree an amount that you will be able to afford to pay each month and stick with it.
When you stop gambling, you will begin to realise how much expendable income you have!
There are companies who will organise a debt management plan for you if you have multiple creditors but they will charge a fee. In England there is an organisation called Step Change which is a charity organisation and so hey do not charge for the service they offer. Your creditors may point you in the direction of where to go for help with your debts.
Find out where your nearest GA meeting is and attend. Be completely honest with your husband about the extent of your gambling; when, where, for how long.
You will never get your 14k back. I'm glad that your husband is standing by you and now he needs to take control of all of your household finances.
Good luck with your recovery.
Hello key_d,
Welcome to the forum.
You’ve mentioned ‘Euros’, so it sounds like you’re based outside of Britain. The GamCare website has a 'Links' page that details services that are available in various European countries, for example Ireland. Please do look at it, so you can see how to access support near you:
http://www.gamcare.org.uk/pages/links.html
As you’ve had recurring difficulties with your gambling, this could be an opportunity to find out more about treatment options in your area, as well as accessing local professional debt advice services as billy1312 has suggested.
You might also be interested in another forum for people based outside of Britain called gamblingtherapy:
https://www.gamblingtherapy.org/en
This sounds like a difficult time for you, so well done on reaching out for support.
Take care,
Adam.
Thank you Billy and Adam for your support and advice. I live in the Netherlands and have found an english-dutch bilingual GA meeting tomorrow night in Amsterdam that I will attend. My husband is dealing with the bank and it looks as if they will work with us, also I am looking for work since I finally got my permit today (been here 3 months).
I think starting a diary would be a good thing so I will try later tonight. I have read a few very inspiring stories in the diaries so far.
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