So today, i lost everything i could get my hands on which was just under 2000. lost it all in a FOBT. initially 700 up then lost 500 then back up back down then lost everything. i cant seem to stop gambling. I dont even win. i gamble so much that any win i do have isnt even noticeble because it is very quickly turned into a loss. Today for example, i was up for all of 2 minutes. i cant recall any win on this gambling in recent years. ive lost on everything. football, sports, roulette, FOBT's.
last time i had any win was back in 2013. i am beginning to question my sanity. I dont even relise what i am doing most of the time. The anger i have at myself is unreal. I know those machines are only designed to take money. I have played them long enough and witnessed enough of them to know there is only one end result.
I am really worried about how bad things are getting, because i dont win at all ever. in the last few years i havent won anything, and it seems all my money has just gone on gambling. I dont even spend money on other things. Everything on gambling and i dont seem to be able to stop or understand what i am doing.
I have self-excluded from countless numbers of betting companies yet there are always new ones appearing so self-exclusion as a policy to me is worthless and maybe just something the gambling industry trys to say it is doing something about problem gambling.
Likewise, i live in central london and there is 100's of betting shops within 20 minutes traveling distance. i have self excluded from them but the staff never remember me. The whole industry is a farce. The gambling commission is useless and is laughing all the way to the bank with all these new licensees. Nothing is really being done by the gambling commission or others to stop all this. FOBT's should be banned or at very least stakes should be restricted. I lost 2000 in the space of 10 minutes today.
Ultimately i am responsible for my actions and my losses. However, I am getting fed up by the lack of safeguarding action from the industry, politicians and the gambling commission. All they hide behind is self-exclusion, which simply doesnt work. if you are going to keep granting new companies licensees at a rate of one every week it seems, then this simply undermines policy.
It seems the industry is above the law. you can go in no questions asked and lose 1000s with no questions asked. no other industry would allow that. Maybe the illegal drugs trade. The gambling companies fund everything, from gambling commission, IBAS and even gamcare and the likes. I wouldnt be surprised if a few MPS recieve regular brown envelops aswell. Its a huge gravy train for a lot of companies and people, at the expense of lives been destroyed.
There are things they could do but they simply dont want to. I am sick and tired of this industry and all the damage it is doing to people. I just hope i can somehow stay away.
They really are shameful, the gambling companies. Thier spokesman get on TV saying that FOBT's do no damage and talk about all the jobs they provide for people. Staff that work in the shops are very underpaid. IT is not surprising that they dont remember self-excluded customers or take an interest in problematic behaviour, when they are being paid such low rates. Here in london the rates they are being paid is probably not enough to live. So im sure the taxpayer has to subsidise these wages with housing benefit etc. Not content with all the money they making from ruining lives, they also dont want to pay thier staff a decent wage, so the taxpayer foots the bill. could not make this stuff up. They keep often one member of staff in a busy bookies and they expect that member of staff to be able to pick out a self-excluded player. Maybe in a country village bookies that would work, but it simply doesnt work here in london, so the bookies are completely underming the self-exclusion policy and the gambling commission does nothing.
Hi Frankie, welcome to the forum 🙂
Lots of frustration there & difficult for me not to agree with you but we are the mugs that fell into this trap & no amount of politics can get us out.
Your story really resonated with me, although my entire gambling career was spent shovelling money into the machines. No-one had a gun to my head & despite regular assurances to myself (when the money had run out) that I didn't have a problem, I could stop if I wanted, I'd forgotten all my plans next time I could get cash again. I even convinced myself that the only way to recoup some of my losses was to play more, even though I knew I would lose! I too spent so long gambling that even with the fantastic odds offered by the FOBTs (not) by the time I'd recycled it long enough, there was nothing left. 'Winning' a top jackpot would barely ever break me even & so on I would chase trying to 'win' more until I had no funds & off we go again, ad infinatum. I too had an exclusion radius (30 miles - just meant I had to waste gambling money on petrol) & reduced limits on all (& there were a lot) of my cards. Until I came here & for a long time after, I thought it was about the money but it isn't. We are mentally unwell but we can fight it. As a barrier, I only carried a joint credit card to start with, mine was so I would get busted but you couldn't use a credit card in the bookies then so if you get one with no cash withdrawal facility, you can still eat & function but don't need to carry cash.
The rest of it is about finding the right help to retrain your brain be that counselling or GA or both. The help is out there but you have to be willing to accept it & be prepared to put in the same amount of effort as you did gambling to get the most back.
Don't wait for policy to change, the gambling commission can't stop us being addicts, seize the power back by choosing "no" - ODAAT
Hi ODATT, thanks for your post.
And your right only we can change it and I need to focus on changing my ways before worrying about any changes in regulation.
It's really awful all this gambling. With every loss I wake up in the morning and i have this sinking feeling. It effects everything from relationships to work ethic. My work ethic has been completely destroyed. I think of all those hours I have to work for money I just threw away.
I've been gambling too long and have had too many losses and it doesn't get easier.
My main problem is I can't just let go. 3 years ago I had my worst ever gaming experience whereby I lost 40k in 2 days and I just cant get over it. I've lost even more since then. I don't know what it's like to have money and to use it live life. For the last 10 years I've always had money for a few days then had to live the rest of the month penniless.
It's crazy that I'm nearly 30 yet I don't know what it's like to just have money in my account and get by comfortably for a month.
I look at my gambling transactions from last few days on my online banking then go back a year and it's the exact same. It feels like I'm forever having this feeling of incurring a loss. I have forgotten what it's like not to have this sinking feeling of regret hanging over me.
I'm going to try gam care counselling I think I need to figure this out because I'm really just so fed up of all this.
I've walked in those shoes, worn them out!
Take a good look @ those transactions & see what gambling has done to you financially...It's what got us here, it's not going to get us out! I used to do overtime to try & claw back my losses but I never made it home after a shift because I used that to justify having a gamble even though I was weeks away from being paid it.
Do some research & figure out what you will use to block your online access (broadband provider or blocking software, k9 is free but there are different paid versions) & in the meantime, start excluding from every online account you have. No financial win was ever enough for me & I gambled as long as you've been alive. I don't know how to function as an adult without gambling but I'm learning & even my down days now aren't as dark as they were when all I could think about was money. Don't be the mug I was, get some sleep now but do phone the helpline 2moro & start the ball rolling. You're obviously an intelligent person, our work ethic gets lost in the fog of gambling but you can find it again, plenty on here have done so. Nearly 30 is a lifetime of life ahead of you, you do need to figure this out & you can - ODAAT
Hi frankie123
Welcome to the forum.
The title of your thread interests me becuase its refreshing to see. I hope you can see that yes you are but dont be afraid of the term mental illness. Thats what addiction is but your mind does heal when you give it that chance. when you start a proper recovery and counselling your mind starts to heal
There are people on this forum who run scared of calling it a mental illness. I dont fully know why. Perhaps they think someone is coming to take them away in a straightjacket.
Self exclusions worked for me and I made sure they knew who I was over several days and many staff faces. I made sure I didnt feel welcome and made sure I had no feeling that they would allow me in or pay me in a blue moon moment.
If its not working for you , you need to step up the blocks. Someone could control your money and you have limited access to cash.
It will take more than willpower. I understand your anger but the gambling dens arent going anywhere in the near future. You are at this stage an active gambler perhaps in the early stages of realisation. You must stop gambling and there are ways of breaking the time, location, money triangle.
It isnt all your fault but you must focus on you and how you are going to tackle this. Self exclusion does work because I felt it drew a line under it. Perhaps you could step that up and take someone in with you ,see the manager and make sure they know about you. I do understand that city life can be different so try other measures. Close friends and family can monitor you and help manage your cash
The addiction is strong and it was with me for 10 months after I joined the forum. I didnt want to stop and realise now that I was making excuses driven by a mind controlling addiction
If you dont act now to put measures in place you will be gambling again despite the pain you feel now.
Being gamble free is a wonderful feeling of self respect and freedom
Best wishes from everyone on the forum
Hi Frankie 123, you hit the nail on the head when you said the gambling commission don't do anything to help! the truth is they depend on the full fledged gambling addicts more so than the people that have an occasional flutter. Hope you get the help you need.
Debra
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