Hello I have been reading these forums for a good 8 or 9 years and have found peoples stories quite inspirational and today I`ve finally signed up to tell my story.
I am 48 this year and had been gambling for about 35 years when I finally decided enough was enough back in 2012 , 28/05/2012 to be exact.
My biggest vice has always been fruit machines starting very young at the seaside arcades and progressing on to balck jack, Roulette and Crapps in the Casino. I liked a day at the races with the Mrs but only ever seen these days as a day out and only ever went to a betting shop to put a bet on the Grand National , My Grandfather and my 2 uncles were Bookmakers and sitting in a smokey betting shop never appealed to me.
I have never let my gambling effect my life to the extent that i got into any huge debt but I did used to do loads of overtime to fund it - in the last 3 years I have n`t worked a minute of overtime and have more money from my ordinary pay than I can "Waste" on my family ,holidays, eating out entertainment etc than I ever had before. And that is the biggest positive I can say I get from giving up TIME WITH THE PEOPLE I LOVE.
I finally realised sticking £100 in a £25 jackpot fruit machine was never going to make me rich or stop me from having to work it was only ever going to make me have to chase what I lost and on those days when I did win it just gave me more funds to chase tomorrows rediculous dream.
I had tried to give up on a number of occassions in the past on 1 occassion I had given up for 8 months then my Mrs surprised me with a trip to Vegas for my 40th birthday so it all started again.
So what happed on the 20/05/2012 to finally make me think that was it?
Well it was nothing Earth shattering it was more a culmination of events , firstly the arcade where I used to go nearly everyday had a free carpark near it which had suddenly become pay and display so I parked on the street instead, secondly whilst ploughing literally hundreds into a machine I asked for change at the same time as about 3 people anyway a row started with the attendant and one of the other punters, I looked around and saw myself with and old man who honestly did n`t have all his faculties a couple of old ladies and young unemployed kid betting his last pennies he could ill afford before the attendant had chance to give me change I just walked out and back to my car to find a Parking ticket on the windscreen !
That parking ticket is still in my wallet as a reminder. Have i bet since then yes about 5 times but never back where I used to go every day . One of these occasions was at Cheltenham on gold cup day 2013 and I said to myself if I win I will give all my winnings to the Mrs and that`s what happened. We have n`t been back to Cheltenham since that day and we used to go every year and that is sad for me because i loved those days with my wife but i have explained to her why I can`t go and she excepts it.
I think I have lost about £100 in 3 years when £100 a day was acceptible to me in the time before i gave up.
I still get urges like everybody but I look at my mental health and the Time spent with the people i love and I way them up against each other and there can be only one winner.
Never give up on yourself because you are the only person that can really make changes for you and if you slip up don`t spirral out of control just get back on track.
I never say I could n`t fall back into the trap again but my main question to myself if I feel like gambling is What are you going to do if you win?
Sorry for the long drawn out introduction but i wanted to get it all down
xxx Stone Roses
Yay...It can be done š
Think you should probably have posted this under success stories but thanks for sharing...It certainly bought a smile to this ugly mug š
Well done for telling your story. I'm pleased u decided to stop lurking!. Your story can inspire us that it CAN be done, and it's not all doom and glooM! Thankyou.X.
Absolutely, thanks for sharing. The thing I am looking forward to most are the things you describe - holidays and other memorable times with my family, so it's great to hear from somebody who is largely through the other side and reaping the rewards. I'm just on the beginning of my journey but am walking round with a winning betting slip in my pocket. I have no intention of going to collect - I don't want to go into that place.
Great story, well done for telling it and well done for making the positive changes.
best wishes,
john
John
Excellent story, Stone Roses.
Great story Stone Roses. Thanks for sharing.
I will be hoping the best for you.
Kind Regards,
AM
ODAAT wrote:
Yay...It can be done š
Think you should probably have posted this under success stories but thanks for sharing...It certainly bought a smile to this ugly mug š
I would never be so Blase enough to post my story in success stories we are all a mad weekend from dissapearing back into that black hole of compulsive gambling but thanks for all the comments. If i have inspired anyone in the slightest of ways then i am extremely happy.
Stay strong keep fighting for you.
Stone roses
I just re read your story and chuckled at the events leading up to you stopping (not the parking ticket!) lol. Im Back here after relapsing but I know I can do it. Iv previously stopped twice. First time for almost two years and a year and a half. The first time I stopped I was in the casino on new years eve...on my own! I had built up friendships with fellow addicts I only knew from the casino. I sat at the roulette table but the electronic version in the hope that noone wud notice me desperately gambling for my chance of starting the new year with money in my pocket!. A gentleman I didn't know sat beside me and talked to me in foreign, I couldn't understand a thing! I went to put another 20 in the machine before the croupier span the next spin. It kept spitting it.back. I was playing 15pd on 28 and the remaining 5 on random numbers over and over. You can guess wot happened next! Yip, without my bet 28 just rolled in. I looked around at the sadness of my plight. It was 11.40 and I vowed I wud b home b4 the turn of the new year and never go back. Although I "fell of the wagon" with online gambling 2 yr later I didn't actually enter a casino again until this year. It was even sadder that every one of the staff remembered me and welcomed me back. No matter how friendly the place is tho I'm done this time x
I still have n`t returned to the arcades i used on a daily basis or the Casinos i used to frequent,
I have gambled probably 3 times since i wrote this but I never spiralling out of control not losing even £30 in total.If i`m honest the buzz has just gone.
The buzz for me now is earning my own money and paying my way for my wife and family and keeping my mental health sane and my bank balance intact.
When May comes this year it will be 4 years since I worked overtime and 4 years since I fed my urges on a daily basis. I`m not saying those urges don`t rear their ugly head because they do but it`s just telling myself if I walked back into those arcades/casinos where they know my name it would be like I had lost before i had opened my wallet.
Good luck everyone in their battles
Stone Roses
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