Hello all
I was advised to come here through gamcare after having a breakdown over my problems, I must say that was over a week ago and I had put off joining as I wanted to continue my gambling and not think about gambling in a negative way.
So my story starts about 5 years ago when I used to play online bingo, maybe £10 a month. I enjoyed it and never considered it a problem. About 3 years ago is when I fell deeper , I found a new love in the online slot machines bagging myself an £800 win at the start, to have that amount of money on top of my wages felt amazing, I was able to go shopping and buy myself things I knew I wouldnt have been able to afford otherwise. I of course tried to replicate this feeling but with no luck on the only gambling website I belonged too. This made me look elsewhere for that big win "buzz". Soon my £10 a month fun turned into a £100 a month habit. I stayed at the £100 a month mark for about a year, thats when I bagged myself a brilliant job as a junior scientist. The wages were double compared the wages I had recieved at my previous job, this meant my habit soon doubled, then tripled and so on. I got myself into some pretty bad debt which I sought help for and got a consolidation loan paying off my overdraft and credit card. This was two months ago, I now have a £1400 overdraft of which I have £50 left to survive on til pay day and £1000 debt on my credit card. Just two months ago I had money, not debt. It breaks my heart to look at my bank balance but i still havent had the strength to stop, convincing myself that my next big win is just around the corner. My family know about my problem and have tried to help but I always seem to find a way around, my mum sat with me and changed all of my passwords but the next day when she was out I changed them all back. I tell myself everyday when i wake up, dont do it today, its not worth it but I cant control myself, I've even gambled in the toilets at work and slyly on my breaks so other people cant see. I cant take this addiction any longer, I want my life back. I see the people around me at work in there own houses with nice things and I wish I could have what they have. I know I could have nice things but for some reason i always choose to gamble instead.
Kayley x
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Hi Kalyleyjane24
I am a recovering CG.
Good advice from Joydivider.
I thought I was a bit unique, that I was a horrible loathsome person, unworthy of a life. I had reached what I called rockbottom. That was until I attended GA. I have heard some terrible stories during my time at GA. It helped me to realise that I wasn't the lowest of the low, but that I could get there if I kept on gambling.That there were more rockbottoms waiting for me if I didn't stop.
You are very young (24, yeah?), so you literally have a lifetime ahead of you. I can guarantee that if you continue to gamble, you will have nothing but misery. Make the decision now to attack this addiction whilst your young, and you have a great chance to enjoy a happy life.
You can do absolutely everything in life that is available to everyone else except for one thing, do not gamble.
Treat this addiction with respect, get help from GA, counselling and your family. You are going to need all the support you can gather to help you in your recovery.
Best wishes
Hi Kayley,
The slot games on bingo sites are designed by brain experts to lure us in and keep us there. You were hooked from the first spin of the reels. The bingo was harmless enough but way too slow and boring to keep us entertained.
Nobody ever wins. They just look as if they win. It all gets fed back in the same day or the next day.
Turn your back on slots. You can do this. We will help you.
Problem gambling is progressive. It will escalate. Your control button doesn't work. You cannot win.
Don't gamble today. Don't gamble tomorrow. Get a string of no gambling days together and you will see the difference in your life. Do everything you can not to place that next bet. Read all you can about how slots are designed and you will run from them.
You can do this and get all the lovely things your fellow workers have.
Take care,
Suzy
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