New and struggling with gambling

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(@beaver)
Posts: 9
Topic starter
 

Hi. I am new to this site. I found this forum very encouraging. I have serious problem with online gambling and can't stop. It's destroying my life. I have had CBT and that has not worked. I am sucked in by "winning streaks". I get lucky and win and feel like I can win all the time until ultimately I can't and lose everything back and more. I am in debt and under huge financial pressure and gambling helps me forget this and also I can try and win money to pay debts only problem is over time it only makes problem worse. I am suffering severe depression and don't know where to turn. I don't have the will power to block all the sites and even if I did I think I could easily overcome it anyway.

 
Posted : 12th January 2022 2:01 pm
Winterishere
(@winterishere)
Posts: 67
 

Hi

Do one thing at a time so it doesn't become daunting. The first thing I recommend you do is register with Gamstop and choose 5 years. If online is your drug then do it today. Get it done and I promise you it will be the best decision you will make to support your recovery.  ?

 
Posted : 12th January 2022 5:15 pm
(@beaver)
Posts: 9
Topic starter
 

Thanks for the advice. That is the part i am struggling with. One part of me know what you said to be the truth but the other side of me doesn't want to block myself for 5 years. It feels like i am losing part of myself.

I am in the process of getting counselling again which will probably take a few days. I've lost all my money so i can't gamble for a good couple of weeks anyway. The urges are uncontrably hard and difficult.

 

 
Posted : 12th January 2022 5:30 pm
S.A
 S.A
(@s-687)
Posts: 4883
 

Hiya... block yourself with gamstop for 6 months then, if the full 5 years seems too daunting. trust me it will stop you gambling online. Within a few days your online accounts will have been blocked. Its a good tool. Give you some time and space knowing you cant gamble.

 
Posted : 12th January 2022 5:48 pm
(@beaver)
Posts: 9
Topic starter
 

Thats just the problem, I can't bring myself to doing blocking myself. I've had a few winning streaks in the past when I won more than enough, a huge amount which would have more than covered my debts and to hide things from my partner but stupidly I thought I was invincible and in the end lost it all. One part of me thinks I can do it again (the stronger thought) and the other thought is history will repeat itself and I will lose but that thought is never at the forefront. That is why for me anyway the addiction is so strong. I am in so much financial trouble it just seems like the only way is to gamble myself out of trouble. And we all know how that goes.

 
Posted : 12th January 2022 7:02 pm
Winterishere
(@winterishere)
Posts: 67
 

So you've proven that even a big win that had the potential to clear all your debt wasn't enough to make you stop and withdraw. That's proof that you can't stop yourself when you're in the grips of the addiction. You'll continue to deposit your money onto these sites and you'll continue to lose or win. You might win big again but you won't withdraw it, you'll continue to play it down until its gone. Completely up to you but the only way forward is GamStop. Hope you decide so you can start to rebuild your life and clear your debt. It's a hard pill to swallow, we all know the pain and anguish. This does go away when you take back control for yourself.

All the best

This post was modified 3 years ago by Winterishere
 
Posted : 12th January 2022 7:38 pm
c43h
 c43h
(@c43h)
Posts: 607
 

You know. Justifying stopping never works when you win. You need to look at the mechanics of all of this. You win huge. Ok what do you do with it? Gamble. Pay a bill or two feel rich for a moment and then you get a new craving and have another go. Then you lose a huge chunk to get a loan to have another go to win again then to lose it. The respect for money is all but gone. You don't care if you have a 100 or 100.000. The more you have the more you will need to lose it inside your mind. It's the madness setting in and almost everyone has gone through the same feeling.

Now look at the results. Got any savings?  Biggest loss is the amount of time wasted. Losing time is not going to be replaced. Every time you repeat you solidify your addiction. You lose more time and the dam results are never going to change. 

Gamblers fallacy is what we all have. We think we have worked out the best way of securing that huge win just to keep it all going but we don't use it even if we did win. We just keep on gambling

Do one month off to balance the dopamine levels. This is what most professionals recommend. It will help you to make a decision as well.

Best

c

 
Posted : 12th January 2022 8:18 pm
(@beaver)
Posts: 9
Topic starter
 

Thats sound advice and thanks everyone. I know it deep down its the right advice just cant bring myself to do it just yet. Fortunately (or unfortunately) i haven't any money to gamble for a good few weeks and I have some counselling and other treatments coming up which will hopefully help. If I am accepted - it will allow me to go away for a few days to get away from all the distraction which honestly is what I think i need. somewhere with no access to a laptop or pc. At this point in time, the only way for me stop is to go to jail or something. Thats how badly the addiction is.

 
Posted : 12th January 2022 9:46 pm
(@beaver)
Posts: 9
Topic starter
 

Thanks c43. Thats solid advice. In the past I have managed a few months off but ultimately the urges got the better of me. I am going to try for another month gambling free. So when I get paid, settle all the bills etc and go through the treatments and any help I can get. If I am succesfu that will work out at around 6 weeks gambling free. I am hoping it will become a little easier after that and the urges will subside. It does feel like I am going to need a lot of support to avoid relapses in future though. It's so hard changing your mindset. I am sure some of you appreciate how hard it is, having gone through it yourselves. The gamblers fallacy and free promotions have gotten thier claws in to me well and truly.

 
Posted : 12th January 2022 9:54 pm
Si_mon
(@si_mon)
Posts: 136
 

Hello,

I agree with what's been said already that you should sign up with Gamstop. I can honestly say it's the best thing I did and I will be 4 years gamble free at the end of the month (paid off debts, bought a camper van and have some money in the bank that I would have been pleased with if I'd had a win!). When I first stopped gambling I didn't sign up and after a few months those feeling of remorse began to subside and I thought maybe I could have a dabble now and then, fortunately I did not gamble as truth be told it wouldn't have been a dabble. I signed up for 5 years and would choose a lifetime ban if it was available.

I wish you all the very best.

 
Posted : 12th January 2022 10:31 pm

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