Afternoon all
I'm currently in limbo with my gambling habits and coming to the realisation it has become an addiction and what steps to take next.Â
Over the years I've self excluded from most betting sites but I had a w**********l account that was limited to £** a month and a b****5 accountant that I was able to deposit £** a week so I had some level of control but going into the betting shops was a bigger issue, I'd be betting £**/£** every other day which soon adds up plus what I was able to deposit online.Â
Anyway in April I broke down to my wife and explained just how bad this secret betting in the shops had got and it was a cry for help but I wasn't ready to completely stop betting so I asked her if I self excluded myself from betting shops and online would she open a b****5 account and she'd be controlling how much I bet and I said I'd stick to £** a week (this seemed manageable at the time)Â
The issue with this is the betting app is on my phone so it's become very easy for me to bet more, approx £** a week which over a month and a year is a lot of money I could save or use for something better!Â
I'm not betting money I don't have but it's getting me down because I never win anymore so there's no real enjoyment anymore but I convince myself the next bet will win and this is a vicious circle.Â
I'm at a point were maybe it's just best to close my wife's account so I no longer have access to any betting accounts, my main fear is filling the void as it's football I bet on so my Saturday afternoons have revolved around bets for the past 17 years so it's a hard cycle to break.Â
Also after I take the next step of closing all accounts will I need additional support i.e GA groups as I know there's one close by or can I try just deal with my emotions and filling the empty void left on my own.Â
Any advice and support is appreciated.Â
Thanks in advanceÂ
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Hello Ljb2025!
Welcome to the Forum,
Well done for making your first post. You describe in detail the progress of you recovery journey and blocks and challenges along the way. You have quite correctly estimated that filling time will be the next challenge once you have more effectively blocked and removed avenues of being able to gamble. Many people find it beneficial to proactively plan how they will fill their time rather than wait in the vacuum of time. You are likely to know what pockets of time in your week tend to be free and and when you are at most risk of triggers. Perhaps have a think about what hobbies you would like to rejoin or try and implement them. This could be a mixture of things at home and outside of the home. It could be a combination of activities alone and some with friends and family. We would not recommend trying to replace gambling with a singular activity as this tends to put too much pressure on that activity.
Wishing you the best with your activity plans.
Louise
Forum Admin
My advice to you is to have a think about where you are. To me you seem undecided about leaving gambling behind. You know it’s the right thing to do, but I get the impression you don’t want to. ‘Maybe’ delete your wife’s account? You are here asking for help. Surely that means you are ready to quit. You need to cut off all gambling opportunities now. No half measures. Trust me, do this now before you lose everything. Why risk a happy marriage for the chance of winning a few quid on a Saturday football match. Change your routine. It’s tough, but give up football for a few weeks. Honestly, it’s not that important when you realise what life actually is without gambling.Â
Wishing you all the best. Keep posting in here. It really does help.
Stay strong 💪Â
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