Hello all,
Im joining here from the US. Started gambling when I was 21 when someone taught me how to play craps. Was hooked ever since. Never had any savings, always had significant debt. My credit score is miserable, I've borrowed from everyone that I could, promising to pay them back by a certain time, and never coming through of course.
Before I got married, my wife, then gf, bailed me out. This was 5 years ago now, and 6 months ago I had to come clean to her again. I was still chasing some losses and debts that she didn't know about. The pressure got to me, and she knew something was up. I couldn't lie anymore and told her I needed more money from our savings to pay off a debt to her cousin's husband. She told me she would leave me if I ever did it again.
Yesterday, I thought I would innocently put $20 bucks on an online casino, but there was nothing innocent about it. My wife found out about it, and she was extremely upset, still is. I feel horrible that everything was going well and now she can't trust me again over this awful online gaming addiction that has cost me tens of thousands of dollars.
We have 2 beautiful girls, a nice house and both of us have good jobs. I can't jeopardize our families future. I'm thankful that this forum exists, and I think it will help me. I want my family to look at me as a provider and someone they can trust. Thank you.
Hi Jbrickz48,
Welcome to the forum and thanks for your post. It sounds like gambling has really caused a lot of stress in your life over the years, and it's a good time to finally wrap it up. If you're gambling primarily online, have you thought about getting any blocking software for your computer? Programs like Gamblock or Betfilter prevent any gambling sites from opening once they're dowloaded, and a lot of gamblers find them to be really good protection.
Beyond that, maybe looking into individual counselling would be a good idea. That could help you understand better why you gamble like this, and help you with ways to manage your urges more effectively and choose healthier options. You don't say where you are in the States, but many of them have agencies that provide free or low cost gambling addiction treatment. I'd suggest Googling that for the state you're in and seeing what comes up.
Feel free to keep up with our forum as much as you like, and I hope you'll find it to be a supportive place. You're certainly not alone with this problem, and many, many people here in the UK struggle with it as well. It sounds like you've got some good motivation to quit, and as long as you've got that desire, you'll eventually succeed. Now you've just got to take some practical steps to start making that happen.
Hang in there, and I hope this helps.
Travis
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