I am now 58 . I gambled probably from the ages of 16 to 38 (and looked longingly into the arcades much before that)- and in that period lost 100s of thousands of pounds, ended up going to Prison having spent time in the Gordon Moody residential foundation for around a month - where they said I was one of the most severe cases they had met
I would bet on anything that moved or anything that didnt, literally thousands of pounds an hour - I didnt care if I won in the end, It was literally self destruct
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My family were so trusting in me, that when it all came to light, they were absolutely devastated
Debts/ Credit cards/ loans/ theft from employer/ intercepting mail -Â they all came so easy -Â Gambling had taken away my conscience
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20 years on having held down the same job during that period, and so fortunate that family and friends stood by me I am now close to retirement - Our mortgage is paid off next month, and I am able to retire early with a nice lump sum behind us -Â and having given our children a sizeable deposit for their homes
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None of this seemed remotely possible 20 years ago, and I really did need to hit rock bottom - those 3 months in Winson Green really were a life changer - Hopefully anyone who reads this will see there is a way out
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My wife looks after the bank accounts, but I still go through the finances with her, so I know where we are at, she lets me have money and even have her apple pay on my phone - she used to check it daily - she still does but probably weekly
I am certainly not cured, and never will be, and my main worry is if i was on my own later in life, how it would be but it is so nice to wake up day after day without that constant worry about being caught, how i was going to get our for the next bet, how i was going to intercept the mail
To everyone of you suffering this horrible addiction, and every family member out there, make sure that the full truth is out, so that you can properly start on your recovery - 1 remaining secret will mean you wont get out of the cycle and love and best wishes to you all
Amazing read mate, i am close to a year gamble free and i have seen huge changes in myself things can improve this took me many years to understand this after countless relapses to understand i simply cannot place a single bet or be in environment with any form of gambling, i agree the more extreme meassure taken the better it is as their always an element of a risk, i too have made adjustment in my life using my previous relapses as trail and error so i dont repeat the same mistakes and so far it working
@xegtl5shrb I loved your post mate. It gives hope to us all.
I have been thinking about if I can ever be 'Cured'. I would love to say that I know 100% I will never gamble again but I think it would be arrogant and complacent for me to think that.Â
I will always have the predisposition to gamble, but it does not mean that I will. Is that cured? I am not sure, but Ill take it!
Thank you again for your post
I love this so much - there truly is hope for us all! Super inspiring, thank you so much for sharing 🙂
Hi @xegtl5shrbÂ
This post is so full of hope and it's great to read how you have moved on with your life and in a much better situation.
I would also echo what you say and encourage people to speak out and let their family or friends know when they are struggling.
Life can be difficult, but with the right support, we can thrive in every area.
Thanks for your post and all the best on your journey!
Thanks
Cabe
(Volunteer Online Peer Supporter)
And this is why I read every post on here. I feel like I can live a normal life, I’m only just over 2 months gamble free and can see the benefits. I know it’s a long road ahead but to see how it can change someone’s life and summed up so well in a few paragraphs gives me hope that no matter how deep someone gets, there is always hope. Someone, somewhere has been deeper than you and come out to tell the tale. Congrats on taming this, and I hope you continue to enjoy a gamble free and happy lifeÂ
Hi
For me my addictions and obsessions indicated that I had certain emotional triggers.
When I could not cope with pain fears frsutrations loneliness and boredom I would escape to my unhealthy habits.
I am a non religious person yet I am becoming amuch healthier spirtual person.
The money was just the fuel for my addiction.
By attending meeting was not about beating my self up but more about admitting that my addictions were hurting me and other people.
The recovery program would first of all help me abstain from my unhealthy addictions and obsessions.
Only when I was abstaining from my unhealthy addictions and obsessions then I could start to heal my pains which were earlier in my life.
The healthy healed people in the recovery program helped me understand and start to heal my deep seated pains.
The healthy healed people in the recovery program helped me understand and start to reduce and face my fears.
The healthy healed people in the recovery program helped me understand and start to reduce my unreasonable expectations of people life and situations.
It was simple a day at a time.
Just for today I was not gamble.
Just for today I do not want or need to gamble.
If I go back to gambling I have not resolved my emotional triggers.
If I go back to gambling I have not healed the hurt inner child in me.
It was important to write down my needs.
It was important to write down my wants.
It was important to write down my goals.
Healing love and peace to every one.
Dave L
AKA Dave of Beckenham
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