This time I’m going to beat this

Hi Liz, I read your post and to be fair it is very similar to my situation prior to 28th July 2022. I have not had a bed since then which is over 15 months now. 

Like yourself I was taking out loans, the worst ones being the high interest ones where I would lose my mind and borrow £1,000 only to have ro pay back over £,3000, it was silly and just made no sense, I would convince my self that I was taking out the loan to consolidate my debt but I would gamble with it and get Into more debt.

You mentioned the TV adverts, well the ones I hated were the l*******s ones, sating 'when the fun stops stop'. In my 50 years and at least 28 of them gambling I have never seen people in bookies showing happiness etc, ita been the other way round.

How did I stop gambling?. It was the 28th July 2022, I won a bet of xxx but bookies could not pay out due to a IT glitch, it took me 3 days to get the money, when I got it I gambled it away, i went home feeling low, I could not even get a payday loan anymore, nobody would give me credit. It was then that it dawned on me that if I continue I will lose my job and my career. 

I sat down in my home office and looked at my excel spreadsheet, I worked out how I could get to end of month and slowly reduce my debt. I am pleased to say that over 15 months later I am dent free, I have savings, I have items in my house that if I had then inn2022 I would have pawned them.

I have at times been tempted to, bet, bit for me it is not worth the misery of having no money or the shame of taking out loans and lying to my friends why I could not have a night out, or nearly losing your job. 

It is one day at a time but its worth keeping going. 

With you 100 percent Liz your post helps a lot of people and shows commitment and determination great stuff

Hi

The simple truth being addicted to gambling was just to painful and abusive self destructive.

I started over 50 years ago and now embrace a much healthier life with out my unhealthy addictions and my unhealthy obsessions.

I have been in very unhealthy action with slots, bingo casinos and even machines.

Now the only thing that helped me live a healthier life was going in to the recovery program.

The most important things for recovery for me was complete abstaination, handing over of my and our finances, and put as much time and effort in to my recovery as I could.

Being an addict was very painful and self destructive.

My escape was very muc fear based issues.

The panick stress anxiety and depression was very unhealthy for me and for my life.

I often used watching tv as an escape.

My life today is abaout moree halthy balace in my life.

I would work hard for my money and on payday give all my hard earned money to complete strnagers while I and my family went with out.

The lies were all fear based.

Was I hiding from my self..

I understand that givign up my addictions and obsessions was not a fight with my self but it was a complete surrender from a place of peace.

No one could stop me gambling.

No one could stop me lying to my self or other people.

Money was never my problem I was the problem.

In time I paid off my debts and it took me some time, but we did it.

Today I do not want or need to gamble.

Going with out for so long was very painful and very frustrating.

The addiction and the obsessions were very unhealthy habits for me.

In time I would exchange my unhealthy habits in to ealthy habits.

Thanks for reading your

Dave L

AKA Dave of Beckenham

Hi Liz

I can identify with many of the suffocating events you have listed above, which are caused by 20 years of gambling addiction on my side. Only difference is my choice was sports betting, in fact it makes no difference as they are all types of gambling that leads to misery and devastation to people with addiction.

Just a friendly suggestion that, it would help if you can find, or already have, a good activity or hobby to replace the time you would otherwise waste on gambling. For instance, I reignited my love of reading since stopping and it gives me confidence to know I'm doing something good and it takes my mind away from thinking about losses. It doesn't do any good to keep thinking about something you can't change.

It's also good to see you have a strong determination and I wish you all the success in the World for stopping gambling and have the life you want.

Take care.

Ergos 

@x05b3kedjt Hi Liz, I could have written this myself! I’m 52 and stuck in this horrible cycle with no money and £30k of debt. Today is day 1 for me and I’m determined this time.

trish