What is wrong with me?!

Hello mate,

sadly what is “wrong” is an addiction that will tear you apart, trust me I’ve been there. However, right now it sounds like you need some help. Is there anyone you can talk to, anyone who is aware of your gambling and how out of control it is? Do you have enough money to pay your bills, get food etc? If not I’d advise contacting banks and such and letting them know before bills start to bounce and your credit takes a hammering, there are food banks if your struggling for food? 

I’m sure the moderators on here can signpost you to some charities that can provide help and some contact numbers etc for people to talk to about your debt and your gambling. This is not something you can do alone, is there anyone you can reach out to? 

hope you get something in place, sometimes you really have to hit rock bottom before you can start to rebuild. As I said I’ve been there with the massive loans wages gone within hours, 7-8 credit cards chasing me for money I never had, and every day it was always one big win that’s all I need, I often had what I’d consider really big wins, and within hours it was back with the bookies and I was chasing even more losses. If I can help at all, gimme a shout I’ll be around

@phil-dunphy 
thankfully I have enough in my bank to cover my bills and rent but everything else like food, “play money” transport ect nothing! 
my mum and sister know about it as Iv had this problem years. I haven’t had a relapse since 2019 but I think this is around my 4th now. They have bailed me out every single time and I just can’t tell them again, the look of disappointed on their faces is awful. I’m a grown woman and they see it as a choice as such which I get. They just don’t understand it, and then I cause them so much worry and stress ect from my doings and I just don’t want to do that to them again. None of my friends know because I’m ashamed of it, I know it’s a huge thing people don’t understand. 

X

@phil-dunphy also thank you so much for replying x