I have updated my recovery dairy to those who are reading it... but also wanted to start a new thread as feel I need to have a rant and get some opinions from maybe new people... so I actually got as far as 52 days!!! Yes 52 days!! And then like a stupid silly woman had some scratch cards which led to playing online slots again! Which is my worse demon and completely eats all my money! I really thought I'd turned a corner and was so certain I would reach my target of 100 days, but the gambling demon took over my brain again and made me think I was in control of my addiction,, made me think I would be able to spend a certain amount and then stop!.. even though I only spent £50 this time (because I run out of funds in my account!) I know full well I could have possibly spent hundreds! If the money was there.... I am soo disappointed with myself and I,m really gonna try with all my heart and soul to get to my target of 100 days, I have blocks in place now on my devices and I will be coming on here every day and rightin in my recovery dairy now and again to keep my sanity and everyone up to date..... opinions and comments most definitely welcome xx
Thankyou for posting on my diary...I won't let my guard down...so many stories on here has scared me to death...on day 1 I got excluded from all sites I used and put software on phone...and have my laptop away...it's a hard struggle and I hate myself for getting sucked in...I take one day at a time and try to un tangle my head and emotions a little at a time...un ravelling the things that lead me to get addicted in the first place...long way to go yet...but fingers crossed...good luck to you..stay strong x
Hey justwant2benormal, 52 days is still a good crack! Lots of people take a few attempts to quit so hang in there! Hope you can go longer this time around.
Hi
I think what keeps me focused is knowing its a losing game and having blocks on I dont feel inclined to break. I know that without those blocks I would probably have wandered in again. Im pretty much stable on knowing I would never win because I never did when it was important
You will need to look at how easy it was to use your online devices and those blocks are going to have to be stepped up through the roof. Thank heavens I never took to online gambling and have never shown any inclination to start. I do work it through and am never complacent with any of these" routes" in
Well done for 52 days. I believe when you have stepped up to another stage you will find it easier to do that again and more.
Best wishes
Morning,
It seems that what you've tried before simply isn't working. Presumably because it's largely based on willpower that melts away in the face of temptation. Willpower is as much use as a chocolate fire guard if the time money location triangle is intact, if you're serious about giving up, stop leaving doors open. Refocus your willpower to break the triangle.
Not easy to avoid scratch cards but you could help yourself by telling the local shopkeepers that you have a problem and enlisting their help. Temporary embarrassment vs permanent gambling. You're probably not the only one, you're more likely to find sympathy and support rather than raised eyebrows at the volume of scratch cards. I don't know if it's possible to exclude scratch cards from your on line purchases, may be worth a phone call to the supermarket to explain the problem and ask for their help. Or change the settings so that your OH or someone else vets the order and pays with their card? Or don't shop on line. However you do it, change your shopping habits.
However lethal the on line slots, they are easier to avoid. Blocking mobile devices effectively takes serious IT skill, the safest is to install blocking software on laptops and desktops and stick with a non internet mobile. And close all accounts, asking for permanent SE and no further contact by any means.
Look again at the money side and again, get someone else to help, hand over financial control. If there's no one who you can ask, open an instant saver. Set up direct debits going out on pay day for essential outgoings from your current account and also to move the excess into the instant saver, which is cashcard only. Ask for a low withdrawal limit. And order a new visa, scratch off the security code so it can't be used on line.
Also sort out real life support - forget the preconceived notions of religious cults, working men's clubs etc and give GA a fair chance. And try getting (more) counselling.
If you're serious about giving up, it means you making changes and putting in the effort - for you. If you don't, who will?
BW,
CW
We are available 24 hours a day, every day of the year. You can also contact us for free on 0808 80 20 133. If you would like to find out more about the service before you start, including information on confidentiality, please click below. Call recordings and chat transcripts are saved for 28 days for quality assurance.
