So its now day 26! i really cannot believe i have got this far.. i lost my father in law christmas eve, and i thought maybe that would push me back to gambling, as a distraction, to forget everything, just for a while.. forget the devastated face of my partner who now has no dad and the fact i had to tell my 12 year old son he had lost his grandad, which was the hardest thing i have ever had to do, but no?!! it didnt send me back to gambling it just made me miserable and not want to do anything at all.... anyway i will skip to the point, i,v basically spent lots of money over xmas as we all do especially when you have kids, and also helping out with costs with the funeral and a suit etc, i now only have £1000 clear in savings in my bank account now and now im stressing and worrying and even thinking of gambling because i dont think this is enough to have saved, am i being greedy? or unrealistic? is this amount ok should i worry? any advice or opinions welcome, negative comments also welcome to put me in my place x
You're being pulled by addiction! £1000 is an awful lot of money to a CG & now is the time to stand up for yourself & choose 'no' to gambling because if you don't, chances are that £1000 will diminish fast!
Your whole family has had a shock & possibly even a terrible Christmas, don't make it worse by staking money you can't afford to lose because it will take more than just money if you give in now!
You are doing brilliantly well! The targets you put on yourself are not necessary & are just an excuse for Mr Gamble to keep inviting you out! They should be realistic based on your earnings & outgoings because with the best will in the world if you set them with gambling in your mind you will fail! Don't forget why you can here in the 1st place & never ever give up fighting!
26 days is proof that you can do this! Keep fighting for normal - ODAAT
This is normal life I am always doing this carp when I am gambling. It's an urge the devil on you shoulder. We have to struggle through but you will get there Michael
Thank you for your comments, advice, I just really need to know how much I should have saved I have no one to compare this to, I need my mind putting at rest it sends me mad not knowing what other people have saved, and if I am saving enough each month, that's what lead me to gamble in the first place, what do u all try and save each month? Sounds stupid but it really helps knowing Xx
You're searching for the holy grail...Savings are all relative compared to your earnings! A professional footballer say could save thousands every month, someone on the minimum wage pennies, most CG's nothing! Comparatively you are in a great place but putting restrictions like this could destroy you because gambling & savings do not go hand in hand! I earn over £2000 a month & I aim not to go overdrawn! Don't let this be an excuse to justify your gambling, I know you were doubtful originally whether you had a problem but stuff like this is an alarm bell to me...There is no such thing as free money! Work out your incomings & expenditure, allow a little bit for extravagances & then see what's left but never ever think that gambling will make you rich, none of us would be here if it did & there wouldn't be new shops & new sites popping up every day if it weren't lucrative for the people running the show!
As compulsive gamblers we will never be happy with any amount that we have ....
Scenario 1: Woohoo I've got a grand, I can afford to gamble...
Scenario 2: Oh I've ONLY got a grand, lets gamble and see if I can get more.....
Lets face it, in either scenario the chances are that by gambling you won't have that £1000 for very long.
I've been gambling for over 10 years, had my financial rock bottom very early on in my gambling addiction but have somehow over the years managed to build up a good amount of savings, and yet I am still plagued by gambling to the extent that it is now chipping away at that money. Logic and common sense are not features of a person's brain when consumed by gambling.
Hello, Thanks for sharing. Sorry about your loss of family . I understand about looking at money as something that could get us more money by gambling. My saga has been to get just a little ahead then try for more and really blow it because I am an addict and I can never stop once I start gambling. Yes, the amount of money we earn or save or spent is subjective. How about valuing our serentiy like gold and protecting it. I like that, how about you? Many blessing to you at this time. God bless. T2
tara2 wrote:
Hello, Thanks for sharing. Sorry about your loss of family . I understand about looking at money as something that could get us more money by gambling. My saga has been to get just a little ahead then try for more and really blow it because I am an addict and I can never stop once I start gambling. Yes, the amount of money we earn or save or spent is subjective. How about valuing our serentiy like gold and protecting it. I like that, how about you? Many blessing to you at this time. God bless. T2
Thank you tara for your advice, it is true we can't win because we can't stop, I suppose as it's been Xmas and paying towards a funeral I haven't really seen the benefits of stopping gambling yet as I haven't really been able to save, I would just like to know what other people try and save each month/week and wot people think a rainy day fund should be?? Xx
Hi justwant2be normal.
Are the bills paid with food on the table? That all that should be concerning you as savings are relative to earnings. There are times last year when I would have given the earth just to have £200 in savings or even less.
What measures do you have in place. is your partner helping you. These are the important points to consider.
Things you have to pay and not being as rich as we would all like is an issue to be dealt with in life. Gambling was never the answer to that because they dont set up fancy shops to help you out.
Please have the exclusions and blocks in place. I believe the gambling seeps out of you when the focus in life is right.
You are stessing too much and stress anxiety and depression all have to be looked at as triggers. If you are ahead you can find happiness in a clear horizon.
All the best and keep up the abstinence. If you cant gamble you wont. you will suddenly find other things that make you happy and focus on your family and how lucky you are to be in good health
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