Be kind

Hi

Yes I generally agree with that. Most people joining the forum will be hurt and confused in the grip of an addiction.

I understand the need for empathy and a soft approach.

However I think there is a time for more direct talking to make people really think about this or we just get a forum with a hundred replies saying there there and take care hun.

The people that helped me, made me think outside my comfort zone. Yes it was nice to hear take care but the people that really helped me were not afraid to point out how confused I was and what I was doing completely wrong.

The problem with addiction is those words can seem tough to a person surrounded by the escape blanket the addiction created. The addiction completely alters minds so its a sensitive subject we cant shy away from to really help

There is tried and trusted advice. Confusion needs guidance and the people well into recovery can fully understand that confusion.

Abstention with the help of others is a common goal. I dont go into specifics about what therapies or thought processes may work  for an individual.

However I dont believe there are that many ways to get the basic foundations right...the foundations of recovery are everything in my view

Do you have any specific examples? The forum is moderated and they do a  good job of that.

Best wishes to everyone on tEh forum

Yes Joydivider I get what your saying it was more related to chatroom.

I agree with you it is good to be constructive and offer support and advice but also important to think about peoples feelings you never know what anyone's going through I understand what you are saying but it's not okay for people to be personally unkind to someone if it is not to offer support/ advice .

Hope your well x

I have to agree with joydivider, the best advice I have got and the ones that made the difference were the ones that hit home and that I didn't want to hear.

I agree the same helped me.

What your both saying is not unkind as you both mean well and you want to support people..

I mean when someone intentionally is unkind with no significant benefit personal but not wanting to offer support.

Were here to support/ advice one another and what your both saying makes sense I agree. But I've never seen any of u 2 be unkind ..your both very supportive to people from what I've seen

Loulou x

I believe first and foremost that everyone on the forum should be treated in a kind and respectful manner so they can feel safe and supported.

We all have feelings and those feelings will probably have had the stuffing knocked out of them by the time a compulsive gambler arrives at Gamcare.

Obviously it is good to point out wise things one can do to help address a gambling addiction but I do not think it is correct to pass judgement, give orders or harshly criticise another persons recovery.

I also think we should try to be compassionate, understanding and tolerant. We might not agree with how a person behaves or the things a person says but we do not know the troubles that have plagued the lives of our fellow travellers.

Gamcare are well experienced in keeping the peace and it should be left to them to have words with those who are acting in a supposedly unreasonable manner and they can look at it from all sides and than steer people in the right direction.

Sometimes people can be insensitive to the feelings of others and not even be aware of it.

Anger, bitterness and resentment do not solve disputes they only make matters worse.

We are all members of the gamcare family.

Love and best wishes.

Stephen x x x