Cant stop

You can't expect counselling to cure you, the work needs to come from you. Same with any other addiction. Counselling helped me understand a few things that were staring me in the face that i was not aware of.Take those tools and use them.

can't or wont stop ?

The problem with the gambling addiction is that it doesn’t really effect anyone other than you

if you’re an alcoholic your probably on the streets causing all sort of trouble ……society has to step in to help

If you’re a drug user then chances are your involved in the supply chain of buying and selling drugs ….again society steps in

If you’re a gambler and your just holed up in a casino or bookies you aren’t causing trouble for anyone but yourself and maybe your bank

The truth is nobody cares that you gamble you may get some small attention from friends and family if you win big but the majority will be frothing at the thought of you losing it anyway , and trust me you will eventually end up losing it because nobody is lucky enough to be able to win every time they play

I remember last year I won around 600 on a random Tuesday night I felt on top of the world and ran to tell my girlfriend the good news but she just didn’t get it ……..the money wasn’t well earnt it was just numbers on a screen there was really nothing to celebrate ….. she just said you better transfer that to me before it all disappears

The psychological damage this addiction does is so alarming and what’s even more frightening is that only people who gamble can understand it hence why the forum is so active

everyone on this forum is in the same boat we have all at some point realised we are in a very deep hole because of gambling usually financially but in some cases the gambler has caused a lot more damage than just financial luckily those cases are rare

Your right there’s not much help out there ……gambling is your problem and you alone have to find a way to beat it

I have to disagree with you there nipped & salamander...

Society doesn’t step in to stop people drinking or taking drugs! “It” may do so to lock people up where they are signposted to similar groups that are available to us as gamblers! Getting addiction under control has to come from the addict but it doesn’t have to be done alone! There is plenty of help & support for gamblers (GA, counselling) but as urgh says, they’re tools, not a cure...Have a read through the AA Big Book if you need to see “hopeless cases” turn things around!

Hi Salamander,

I agree, for some, stopping a gambing addiction can be impossible. Like you, I tried everything to stop, counselling, self-exclusion, gamblock, hypnotism. I even stayed at a gambling rehab centre called 'Gordon Moody' but left after being spoken to like a child. I was so desperate to stop because I couldn't work anymore and had pushed everyone away from me. I was planning my suicide and then I got in touch with the 'problem gambling' centre in London. They prescribed me a drug that takes away your cravings called Naltrexone. It's only been a month but I haven't gambled and as you can't drink alcohol on this medication, I no longer drink. Drinking was a major trigger for a relapse so it's potentially been life-changing for me. Maybe you should look into this? They don't hand out this medication unless you have proved to have tried everything else.

Good luck.

Stu

ODAAT wrote:

I have to disagree with you there nipped & salamander...

Society doesn’t step in to stop people drinking or taking drugs! “It” may do so to lock people up where they are signposted to similar groups that are available to us as gamblers! Getting addiction under control has to come from the addict but it doesn’t have to be done alone! There is plenty of help & support for gamblers (GA, counselling) but as urgh says, they’re tools, not a cure...Have a read through the AA Big Book if you need to see “hopeless cases” turn things around!

doesnt surprise me odatt we have very different views on gambling addiction

but i can assure you nobody in society is losing any sleep over the person who gambles too much

theres rehab for aclohol addiction and theres rehab for drug addiction heck the NHS has an entire department dedicated to quitting smoking

there is no rehabilitaion service or departments for gamblers its still massively misunderstood and underestimated

.

nipped wrote:

[quote=ODAAT]

I have to disagree with you there nipped & salamander...

Society doesn’t step in to stop people drinking or taking drugs! “It” may do so to lock people up where they are signposted to similar groups that are available to us as gamblers! Getting addiction under control has to come from the addict but it doesn’t have to be done alone! There is plenty of help & support for gamblers (GA, counselling) but as urgh says, they’re tools, not a cure...Have a read through the AA Big Book if you need to see “hopeless cases” turn things around!

doesnt surprise me odatt we have very different views on gambling addiction

but i can assure you nobody in society is losing any sleep over the person who gambles too much

theres rehab for aclohol addiction and theres rehab for drug addiction heck the NHS has an entire department dedicated to quitting smoking

there is no rehabilitaion service or departments for gamblers its still massively misunderstood and underestimated

.

Maybe if you educated yourself on addiction our views would not be poles apart...Plenty of people actually working their recovery with similar views to myself!

The post before yours mentions a rehab clinic & yet you have typed there are none!

You may have heard me mention, I hate sprouts...Never tasted one mind! There are a lot of people on here happy to judge tools that they’re not willing to learn how to use because just like I did for the longest of time, they won’t take responsibility & want someone else to do that for them...Just because I chose gambling doesn’t make me any different to the person who chose drink or drugs except, fortunately for me, my withdrawal was purely the dopamine!

I agree with ODAAT. There are many tools available that I initially dismissed and people who've used the forum for some time know what I used to say about specific routes to recovery. I think a lot of people DO lose sleep over compulsive gamblers - partners, family friends plus decent people who see the chaos and despair it causes. I don't think I'm any better or different to anyone else and didn't think I could stop - but I did and for me (emphasis on ME) 100 per cent commitment from day one was key never mind exclusion, blocks, counselling, groups etc - a lot of that came later. Without that commitment to change my life with baby steps and realistic goals I wouldn't be where I am now with gratitude and humility I didn't have before.

I think that using medication is totaly unnecessary, unless you have other problems, like drugs or drinking or maybe other health problems. Also, I agree that the counselling might help you to deal with gambling problem, but first of all, you need to really want it to stop. You can not expect from psychologists to slove problem instead of you. They can help you to find the way, that is best for you, how to stop your gambling problem. I know that because my little brother is dealing with same thing. We were also on the counseling with professionals. But my brother seemed to be unwilling or unready to deal with his problem. And I have to admit that I have been searching for a long time and I have been looking for a way to solve this problem.I found a site about education for gambling addiction. It calls "How to stop gambling". He accepted this way of treatment, and it works for him. You must find your own way to. But do not expect from others to slove it or just erased it.

'cant or wont' to the idiot who wrote that : what the hell do you think an addiction is??
I would say an addiction is doing something that is damaging but you still want to do it.
If it were as simple as just wanting to stop and then stopping then why would anyone ever need counsellors??
Counsellors surely should fill the role of helping those with a deep grained problem that is destroying them but the person still wants to continue.
Similar to other forms of mental health problems.
If anyone thinks it's just a case of wishing to stop or wanting to stop then why the f**k would there be gamcare and other organisations.
I suggest those who use the simplistic clichГ©s ' only you can make yourself stop' and other prepared thoughts shouldre consider if they have a problem with gambling.

Dear salamander,
There is no need for this type of conversation. I'm not an idiot, i'am just the person who wanted to help you. If you are disagree with me, it's ok, but please don't call me an idiot!
I'm sure you didn't understand me very well! What I ment to say is that the motivation for treatment is really important. It's the frst and most imporatant condition for addiction treatment! It's not like smoking cigarettes or eating chocolate, that you can just say "im done with this"! I agree with you that it doesn't work like that. And I didn't say that! It's important that you have desire to stop gambling and go to counseling and psychotherapy, where you can work on that plan with psycologists. And you will learn how to strengthen and control this impulse that presses you to gamble. As I said, using medication is totaly unnecessary, you must work on your personal development, and develop defense mechanisms, that will help you to deal with your gambling problem. And only professionals can help you with that!

My attitude towards medication is this:

What dose? Will a tolerance be built up? How long for? If the person stops taking it - how will they feel?

I'm no fan of psychiatric medication generally and I'm not sure it's the solution for such a complex problem.

Regarding me turning to medication (Naltrexone). I reached a point where I couldn't see me stopping on my own. I had stopped 5 times for up to 5 months but kept relapsing. It was sheer desperation and I fear somewhere down the line it not working anymore. It has absolutely stopped any cravings to place a bet. In the last 5 years I have only gambled during periods of chronic depression when I was suicidal. Having a bet gave me an escape fro my feelings of wishing I was dead. Since I was prescribed the medication I have felt hopeful and positive that I could get back to work and start living again. I take 50mg.

Naltrexone is for problem gamblers who have tried everything else and haven't been able to stop. It's not given out like smarties. I would rather not be relying on that but my life had become so desperate.

canterbury100 wrote:

Regarding me turning to medication (Naltrexone). I reached a point where I couldn't see me stopping on my own. I had stopped 5 times for up to 5 months but kept relapsing. It was sheer desperation and I fear somewhere down the line it not working anymore. It has absolutely stopped any cravings to place a bet. In the last 5 years I have only gambled during periods of chronic depression when I was suicidal. Having a bet gave me an escape fro my feelings of wishing I was dead. Since I was prescribed the medication I have felt hopeful and positive that I could get back to work and start living again. I take 50mg.

Naltrexone is for problem gamblers who have tried everything else and haven't been able to stop. It's not given out like smarties. I would rather not be relying on that but my life had become so desperate.

Stu
You don't need to explain yourself hun. Looks like the person who started this has been removed. Now called Guest User.

What you find gets you feeling alive again is all that matters.

Goodnight.
Bella x

Hi Bella,

Frustratingly there are people on here who are not helpful and their negative, poisonous opinions are not needed. One user in particular will not listen to any advice and just intends to feel sorry for himself and play the victim. I'm surprised that he hasn't been banned from the site, not mentioning his name. Addiction is hard to understand, it's insanity and that's how I describe my past behaviour, knowing it was ruining my life but not being able to stop. I try to encourage people on here because I have sunk to such depths and experienced so many rock bottoms. My hope is to get through this year without gambling and maybe become a counsellor. It's a sad fact that some people just won't accept help and would rather hate the world and feel sorry for themselves. Rant over.

With love.

Stu