Hi,
I’m 19 and never thought id find myself doing this but my gambling addiction has got out of hand.
It started when i first turned 18 and instantly won around 200 pounds on roulette, from then on i dread to think how much ive wasted gambling.
I’d get my wage every month and instantly wipe it out spending a few hundred trying to chase my losses.
A year and a half later, i find myself in the same situation, after losing 170 pounds today which I just borrowed off a friend to pay something off.
I’m genuinely disgusted with myself and never thought id be so selfish to do something like this but it just seems im at a point where it feels like im spending money that doesnt exist.
And at the time of writing this I am so determined to stop and build savings, but countless times i have said this before and its just so easy to forget the horrible feeling of losing.
I’m fed up of lying and pretending to my family and some friends that i have money, others im borrowing off and although im able to pay them back on payday i still have loans and a credit card to pay off and
im just sick and tired of myself and although i feel terrible and so dissapointed every time i lose, i can just feel myself becoming numb toward the feeling of losing and its abit scary.
I hope this will be the start of a gamble free rest of my life but ive tried to stop numerous times and im just forgetting the feeling of losing far too quickly.
The worst part is I know im stronger than this and i shouldnt be in this situation but its been a year and a half of being at rock bottom with no money and im not sure how im going to stop
Also if anyone else reading this has similar problems I wish you the best of luck, from one struggling person to another, I know we can both get through this whoever you are.
Let me say this I’m 49 and gambled for 13 years- I’m 21 days clear now but after admitting to myself that I will be a gambler for the rest of my life whether I gamble again or not I have to sort myself out. I have blocked my computer using Gamban. Signed up for Gamstop. My friend has put a restriction code on my iphone - I cannot access Safari or Apps therefore and I have installed Betfilter (Gamban does not work on Vodafone network as yet - they say it will be by the end of March) as soon as that is available I will unlock my phone and install that. I have cancelled my debit cards. I can get access to money via other means. I have restricted spending on my CC to £500. I’m lucky as bookies and casinos don’t interest me at all only online casinos. I live too far from them anyway and the I would be too embarrassed to walk into them incase someone knew me!! Keep focused and if willpower does’nt work then block yourself as much as possible. It will be hard - everyday is hard for me but taking away temptation is the key . Now at night i ho to sleep at a reasonable hour not at 3 am as I used to exhausted after spending £xxx and getting up in the morning with that dread and guilt and promising myself never again !! Only to restart in a few days the same process again - it was like Groundhog Day !
Thanks for the reply, I’ve also signed up to Gamstop and im in a similar position where in store bookies or casinos dont tempt me just online casinos and sports betting, hopefully with Gamstop I wont be able to use these once the guilty feeling of my last loss disappears, thanks for sharing your experience with me. It’s good to know there are other people in the same addictive position recovering, regardless of how much money they consider to be too much to lose. 🙂
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