HAS THE PENNY DROPPED YET!..... FOBT'S

Hi,

As a former FOBT player i can fully relate to the above. In my case the trapdoor opened after years of lying and losing and i hit rock bottom.

You are going to get a lot of info today and now is time for some steps to be taken for this to stop.

Time to tell the new wife everything. Never a good thing to have to do but most of us on here have done it. In time you may receive posts from partners of gamblers on here you may not like what they say but it gives a good insight from the other side.

Debt. Consider giving stepchange a call. They help me with my debt and stopped my creditors ringing and writing to me. I pay a fixed fee to Stepchange who distribute it on my behalf.

Self exclusion from bookies is another barrier.

I carried no cards or cash for a long period of time. If i had cash i produce receipts to the penny. Like me you cannot be trusted with cash.

Lastly consider counselling through Gamcare or gamblers anonymous meetings.

If you do nothing your addiction wil continue, the lying and cheating will continue and you may wnd up wifeless, jobless and homeless. I didnt - but was very close to it.

Best wishes

If your wife was carrying on behind your back but you were "none the wiser", how would you feel when it finally came to light? Secrets and lies equal betrayal.

If you want to overcome the addiction more than you want to feed it, then do it properly, go for it and do everything that you possibly can to break the time money location triangle, get counselling, go to meetings. But the cornerstone for recovery is honesty, without that, there's nothing.

Balvaird has pointed you in the right direction, there's a lot of help and advice on the forum. But at the end of the day, it's for you to take it and follow it. Hope you do.

CW

Thanks for the replies guys i will certainly take on board what you have said.

I have made steps to drastically reduce my access to finances, and i will speak to the wife and be honest with her.

My main aim now is to concentrate on reducing the overall debt i have, as this is a big worry of mine, i will look at the stepchange site and see what is available to me. With my current employment situation i should be able to reduce the debt im in by 75% by 1st January 2017, without using gambling,

I know it will be tough and i accept that i dont want to be dealt an easy hand to get out of this i need to learn the hard way.

Its time to keep my mind occupied with positive things and look to the future which doesnt consist of FOBT's

I have even downloaded an app to my Iphone called IquitGambling, this allows you to put in an amount of money you usually spend per day on gambling, and it works like a clock every second = a moneytry value and it adds up, i have this app next to my online banking app so i can keep check,

For the last 24 hours its been quite fun checking it to see how much it has risen.

DP1988

I too echo what other people have said,Stepchange have been a life saver,stops creditors hassling you,please tell your wife a.s.a.P. ,telling my fiancГ©e was the best thing I ever did.He was very supportive and understanding, much more than i thought he would be, lovely feeling to get it off your chest, good luck and I hope you conquer your demon.

Thanks for all the support guys! I virtually am at rock bottom now, I've lost a further £600 in 48 hours and had absolute 0% enjoyment.

I've blocked myself for every online site and taken steps to remove cash availability.

I now face a mammoth task of clearing my debt which is getting me worried and down, however it's my impatient nature that is making me like this, I want the debt clear now, and this is one of the reasons I turned to gambling which is the wrong choice with hindsight. I guess I'll just have to accept it and learn to live with it! I know that one day it will be gone and I'll be free

Sorry to hear that. Your story is like looking into a mirror....I was hooked on the machines too but made requisite changes and am now 2 and a quarter years betfree. Trust me- it can be done. It's not easy at times but is do-able.

With regards to the debts, you are relying on the one thing that got you into debt to get you out of it. Doesn't make much sense, does it?

Please read and put into place Balvaird's advice. It's spot on.

No it makes no sense at all, it's very difficult for me to understand, when I'm not gambling and sat at home just thinking, I think to myself it's utter stupid why do I even bother,

then just like flicking a switch I start to think I'll have a go it'll be right just £50, then that loses and its chase chase chase, it's like an outer body Experience, or if I win I can get up to say £1000 but never once take a step back and think it's time to go now. I just find myself putting maximum bets on allowed with high stakes on numbers just so I can see how much I can win of a spin.

I don't seem to get enjoyment out of winning and certainly don't out of losing, there's just no emotion there at all, I just play and play and play until it's gone with absolute no intention of coming off.

I'd go as far as saying that if I managed to get upto £12000 which is my current debt id never once think "right I've won a do here I've got enough to clear my debt lets go" I'd just keep going and going and going.

It makes no sense at all.

I can remember all of the emotions and behaviours.

Is there a GA meeting nearb you can get to? It really will help if you want to recover and stop betting.

No sadly not there are none close by that I can get too with the hours I work. I've put some steps in place and hopefully these will go towards me stop playing roulette,

One thing I am beginning to realise is I've said I want to stop in the past and they've only ever been half arsed attempts, this time I really need to prove to myself that I want to

First Saturday I've not gambled on years! SUREAL

Hi mate

Can really relate to your story and well done getting through the day! I'm on day 22 and the weekend is deffo the toughest but you get through these little barriers bit by bit.

I posted a couple of times here but didn't really find my 'normal' day to day interesting enough for a diary but it really helps me to read others views. I was so so close to crumbling on Thursday (payday) but having the exclusions with bookies in place kaiboshed any real chance of a slip up. When I got home from work, gamble free, I was smiling ear to ear.

Get the blocks in place and good luck fella

Samsaw

This has been the first weekend in atleast 10 years that I've not ended up playing on roulette!

I usually make an excuse to have a go at somepoint but not at all this week,

I know it's just the beginning of the road but it feels great, I'm happy with myself for the first time in a long time.

Next weekend I'm out with friends if I can not gamble until then, then that's my 2nd mile stone

Beginning of August I go on my honeymoon with my wife, if I can not gamble until then, then that's my 3rd mile stone

Mid September I go on my best mates stag do, if I can not gamble until then, then that's my 4th mile stone.

Great to see you off to a positive start.

It's important to have goals, just make sure they are reasonably easy ones to achieve at first. A day at a time for the first few weeks, then look at, 3 weeks, a month, then longer term goals.

One thing is for sure, you'll have better honeymoon and a more fun time at the stag do, if you haven't gambled the money you could spend on them, on sh*ty gambling.

Cheers steve70,

That's true I'm sure I will do and I'm mega confident on achieving these goals it's a massive thing for me to go a full weekend without playing on them, and having money left over from the weekend i can't remember at all the last time this happened