First time poster here, a few years ago I well and truly had a gambling addiction. Got myself into a whole load of debt, around 10k. My relationship ended and I had to move back into my parents house. I remember being in such dispaire and like my life was over and there was no going back. I joined Gamstop, blocked everything and had blocks on all my cards but I never told any friends or family, the shame of it all was too big and I couldn't bare to tell them. I was lucky enough to realise things needed to change and reading forums like this really helped me feel less alone. I think it was around 2 years of no gambling, got my life back on track, got a great job and I now live alone supporting myself and had been the most financially free in years after paying off thousands of pounds in debt.Â
Fast forward to now, I have been feeling low recently and got caught in a site that wasn't excluded from gamstop. Started with a win, as most of us always do, felt amazing etc all the usual feelings. I hadn't had the buzz in years and should have known better, but unfortunately I never win but had forgotten this. I set to withdraw my winnings and had maybe 2 days before the niggling itch to just have a few more spins. Before I knew it I'd blown it all, but it was okay right? I'd only spent what I'd won. Of course then the chasing came in. I got paid early in December with my yearly bonus I'd worked very hard for, the only silver lining is that I'd paid my rent early, so at least that's one thing paid. However the rest of it, is gone. No money for food, bills or anything else, I probably just about have enough money to feed my cats, but not myself.Â
Spent Christmas day feeling so low, should be out enjoying myself on boxing day however I can't bring myself to even eat. Constant fears of what on earth I'm going to live on for the next 4 weeks, how I'm going to feed myself or what excuse to even make to family I'm skint even though I've just had my 3k bonus. Gutted I've done this to myself. In dispaire, trying to remind myself I've gotten myself out of much worse situations, and this is a set back that will last a month, not a lifetime. However I'm struggling, I've blocked myself on that site however I'm worried I'll fall off again, if it was so easy to do now even though I'd learnt my lesson all those years ago..
Wondering how I'll feed myself and what's going to happen when all my bills get bounced back. This time of year is hard anyway and I just feel like I've really let myself down. If anyone has any words of wisdom with these sites that aren't excluded that would be great. I'm confident I never want to gamble again, but I want to make sure there's no option. Also how have people survived when they've hit a big loss and have no money left?Â
Xx
Well done mate for doing 2 years thats anamazing achievement something similar happened to me i had managed just under 3 years and thought i was past it unless i had massive relapse and more relapses followed, i realised this addiction can catch u out anytime, the best thing i did was joined this site and use the chatrooms regualry i am now around 170 days gamble free, i dont get any urgues however i managed to get myself into debt which i have paid half of it off, i realised by coming on these chatrooms it reminds the dangers of a relapse like a warning, i also realised i cannot get content and once i do relapse i cannot control myself either if i have won or lost i get an itch which results in a huge loss every single time so for my circumstances i need to avoid placing any form of bet when i was having strong urgues few months back i was given advice to read my diary which i set up i also read other people stories which has helped me not to relapse, i have started doing other stuff to keep me occupied i have noticed if i am on my own too much i get these thoughts more often then if i was doing anything else, try find something u enjoy their lots of things u can try i also realised i need to invest in recovery even if it cost me as it far cheaper then another realpse their no majic cure i read recently someone managed 10 years before a relapse which i believe can happen and the worst thing i know if i relapsed to day it would feel like i never missed a day without gambling the addiction becomes too strong to handle so what i would advise u to do try Ga if that works or use the online chatroom few sessions a week and stick to it, the moment u believe your past gambling it the time when a chance of realpse is higher, gambling addiction makes u forget your past its bit like an abusive relationship where everyone see the damage its doing accept you
Dear Achlo97
Welcome to the Gamcare forum and congratulations on publishing your first post.
You have done remarkably well remaining abstinent from gambling for 2 years, that's a massive achievement and you should be very proud of yourself for that.Â
Casinos that are not regulated by the UK Gambling Commission and therefore are not obliged to register with Gamstop can be tricky as they provide little to no protection to UK players, especially ones already suffering from gambling related harms that are registered with Gamstop. With that being said, you might want to consider adding another layer of protection by installing blocking software such as Gamban on to your device(s). This blocks access to over 60,000 websites across the globe and can be installed on up to 15 devices at any one time and works in real time taking the worry out of visiting non UK regulated platforms. With our support, we can offer you this software for free, but you would need to contact our 24/7 helpline which you can do via Live chat, WhatsApp, Facebook or telephone (0808 8020 133) any time and we can furnish you with the promotional link.Â
In terms of your financial situation, I can appreciate the difficult times ahead with not being able to pay your priority bills and feed yourself. However it's important to look after your physical and mental wellbeing in these times. I would recommend calling your GP and asking for an emergency appointment explaining your predicament and they may be able to offer you some food vouchers to get you by until your next payday. Similarly, you could contact your nearest Citizens Advice centre for support with this.Â
The Trussle Trust https://www.trusselltrust.org/ are a charity which support people in hardship and may be able to provide food to you directly, please do reach out to them for support.Â
With your bills, it is not the end of the world if they bounce for one month until you are back on your feet financially, however if you feel it would lessen the stress you could reach out to any creditors and/or energy companies and give them the heads up that a payment this month might not be possible. Understanding the current economic climate, they are pretty reasonable and will likely put payments on hold for a specified period of time easing the pressure your end.Â
Please remember that we have a 24/7 helpline and we will be able to offer you any advice and support you might need with your gambling and that you are not alone in your journey to recovery. It sounds to me that you slipped off the wagon slightly but you are aware this was a blip and that you can get yourself back on track. People often consider setbacks like these as failures, but they can be essential for longer term recovery so please don't be hard on yourself about what has happened. We live and we learn.Â
Wishing you all the best with things and please continue to make use of the forums and chatrooms for further peer support.Â
Best regards,
Forum Admin
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