im so beaten i HATE roulette

hi half life

i booked councelling with gamecare , i self excluded from all bookies in my city center as i live in southampton city center earlier in the year , i then stupidly re activated my exclusion after the year thinking hey im ok now , far from it im going have to do a 3 year ban or permanent i just cant control FOTB , my sports bets are small and managable but them greedy machines totally f*** with my head , also i recently got a new i phone 6 , hey i work hard deserve a treat , bloody bad idea did £400 in a sess in bout an hour then more in bookies , im ill but need to draw strength from older membbers who can abstain , i also been GA i know where it is and what time but last two sundays i avoided it , but i feel i hit my rock bottom , funny thing is i knew it was going to happen but could not stop it , so GA , exclusions and not using my smart phone a start or get my gf to install a gambling block on my phone as i need a phone

i been warned time and time again of dangers im on the brink of loosing of everything just for a spin of a f****g wheel

thanks half life

absoloutley spot on , i just started my first diary aswell for 2016 , im determined to really use this site and the councelling it offers to steadily wean myself out of all destructive gambling , what ever happened to playing a computer game and going shopping for shoes and clothes and normal things , im a dad now i need to grow up and set an example , i love money and buying things so really determined this time and going into new year to put this monkey on his back , i know from GA a CG is a lifetime issue but all i can do is a day at a time a week at a time etc , please support me via my diary

much love

Spraggy2014...You reactivated your allowance in to the bookies??...Thats serious stuff! You should be renewing your exclusion every year and somebody should be walking in with you and saying this is spraggy...he should not be allowed to and he doesnt want to gamble in here or anywhere....Then you reaffirm that. Its not about being a baby...its the most positive thing you will ever do. Im sorry but you may not actually be allowed use of an i phone or internet gadgets. Its that serious!

Gambling has given you serious problems so its NOT for you. Its a mugs game and Im starting to get tougher because you need to actually accept that fact

You know what you need to do but you are not fully doing it. The urges seem strong and you are actually removing blocks. How hard do you work to be throwing it away. Start looking at nice things you and your family could save for and buy

You need further help because gambling is deep within you. Im sorry but I see this so much here where the sports betting runs side by side with machine playing and online

It will ruin you becuse you ignore the odds. Wheres the bit about free easy money?

Do you have any family support? Have you really talked to them because it seems not. You need to be excluded from everywhere and monitored closely? Its a delusional illness and there is no shame in admitting they got to you. Thats what they do becuse it pays for a high life that you are funding

All the best because you can do it when you are ready

@spraggy2014 I feel your pain I've been gambling on roulette now at the bookies and casinos for almost 6 years.. Won big and almost every time I've returned and lost the lost. It ruined my last relationship with my child's mother. I was even at my lowest using her credit cards to gamble. Hanging round the bookies using them cards to try build up some funds. I calmed down over the last two years mainly doing football bets but end of November 15 I won £1800 online lost that in 15mins. Made for a bad Xmas couldn't really treat the family. Then I was getting my self back together and on Monday fine I won't 2k in coral bookies. Same day lost 500 of it. Paid some bills gave the rest to my partner as I know what I'm like. Got canceled for work last night as I'm an escort driver and I look after escorts so suggested to my partner we go casino with 300 quid out of the 1k that's left.. Well we went last night and I lost the 300. Woke up this morning and done another 250. There is more cash in the house I've been looking and can't find it. Things are bad again and I need to stop.. My girlfriend is going to kill me when she gets home this evening. I've self excluded myself online.. I know I need to do the same to the casino and bookies, it's just there everywhere I live in a small town of Essex and have 5 in a 2 mile zone. What are the ga meetings like? Never been.? Really how you get yourself sorted mate