Justifying your gambling

Crazy isn’t it. I was exactly the same (was as in just a few months ago..). I’d be obsessive about it and do it to the penny. I’d get new shoes for work, and order the £35 pair rather than £60 as that would give me £25 free gambling money. 

I always took took pride in not blowing my money on nights out each week etc, while blowing 100x as much on a fake roulette wheel. It’s absolute madness. 

My mind would be blown at the thought of a friend of mine wanting to spend £5000 on a handbag and yet I was £1000s into loans and credit cards which I had pumped into gambling.

My mind now cant believe I used to do That. 

Ive been gamble free now for over a month , in that time I've cleared some  crucial arrears , and actually bought things for my business . and do you know what I'm actually tight with money . except when it came [ remember to use a past tense ] to gambling , where i'd think nothing of blowing hundreds . Now money has value again , i am treating it with respect . so your above post makes sense , there is no logic . 

Crazy isn't it and proof thast is is an illness.

What people need to get to grips with is your own mind is working against you. A mind that is supposed to protect and care for you is actually destroying us. Its a split mind thing...part of my mind did realise the danger at the time but seemed powerless to stop it. I knew it was wrong but couldnt walk away and that it truly scary to think about now

This is a topic that should have its own debate section. Im not sure if my mind was entirely justifying my gambling but I had many thoughts which fueled the urges and my desire to stay there.

I went through all the stages of riding the losses and thinking its only money and I can survive...£100 isnt the end of the world etc... The truth is I have never been comfortable enough or able to chuck any money away like that.

I had an ill relationship with money and with life. Part of the problem is that I hated having limited money so my bigger dreams were on hold...scared to spend it...bills depressed me. I would resent paying bills and take that bill money to gamble

My addiction progressed and it soon became thousands a year that I would think of borrowing back. My confused thoughts we of defrauding my parents or credit companies for the money back so no worries eh!

I would have delusional thoughts that it was a sensible thing to try and win some money. My confused thoughts would tell me that it was easy to get regular small amounts and that I could be a clever gambler by not thinking too big.

Then we get to the core of the illness...well its better than being on the grey streets outside or look I'm part of something instead of being lonely and aimless outside. The fix is a drug addiction. Its not really about the money and thats why its extremely dangerous

I became ill with money... I was scared to spend money...I can be very tight and careful with money so why was I a compulsive gambler? It often hooks people that are actually careful with money when briefly away from it.

I would make very careful purchases and then go and blow thousands gambling. It makes absolutely no sense. I was mentally ill with a serious addiction....hooked on something that compelled me to do it again.

I was congratulating myself for a few days between binges when I joined the forum.

It is very scary the mind works. I was mentally ill and I dont shy away from that term. 

Best wishes to everyone on the forum

ive come up with all kind of fantasy's to convince myself my gambling was under control and proactive

my gambling career spanned over 10 years and over the course s i was a professional blackjack counter , a roulette physics expert and then finally a professional sports analyst 

off course in reality i was none of the above 

i was just another idiot paying his idiot tax to the casinos and online operators

it was 10 years of fantasy and delusion that hasn't left me with an awful lot to show for it aside from many sleepless nights and stress lines

fortunately after one too many losing streaks earlier this year the curtain finally fell down and i finally could see how pointless and time consuming it all was 

Posted by: The only way is up

Ive been gamble free now for over a month , in that time I've cleared some  crucial arrears , and actually bought things for my business . and do you know what I'm actually tight with money . except when it came [ remember to use a past tense ] to gambling , where i'd think nothing of blowing hundreds . Now money has value again , i am treating it with respect . so your above post makes sense , there is no logic . 

Excellent name choice, I must say.

Keep up the good work. The real challenge comes when the pain softens a fair way into the future.  

Ive changed my name as there is another one somehow !!! all at sea is my new name 

Posted by: ALL AT SEA

Ive changed my name as there is another one somehow !!! all at sea is my new name 

Oh Yes  hahahahaha