Hi everyone.
As I type this I am sat at my work place in a side office pretending to be working but in reality I have spent the last 2 days on a gambling madness, I spent 3 hours today gambling on my phone whilst pressing to work.
I lost everything this month, rent bills etc. Had to go the the pawn brokers again for food money.
But what really struck me just now is that I could put my job at risk due to me doing no working ,being slow, not meeting deadlines, I could ruin everything over playing stupid slots on my phone.
I have been in financial strife many times before and no doubt mentally I will get over the lose, but the thing that really messes me up is the time lost in the gambling binges ,the fact sleep eating showering work and any other tasks gets laid forgotten. My levels of self care I so low when I am on a gambling binge.
Chasing loses looking for wins,but money you would never do anything else but gamble with if you win.
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I think you've realised its time to stop? Gambling rarely brought me massive wins and I too loss chased myself into debt.Â
As for gambling at work. I also did this because the urge to gamble was so bad.Â
I found what brought me to want to stop was the realisation (with the help of therapy) that if you chase your losses and won...How much would be the amount to make you stop...
For me Ive gambled thousands, I would never win back what I lost. I used to loss chase and even if I won (which was rare) I'd never stop until I was at £0. I could've doubled, tripled or quadrupled my deposit and it was still never enough. I'd place large bets or go all in on the hope of winning - 9 out of 10 times I'd lose.Â
The fact you're here on this forum is progress. If you want to stop I would recommend tools such as Gamban for your tech this really does restrict access to sites. Gamstop was a game changer for me being self excluded from casinos too. But to stop it needs to come from within you.Â
For me I have been clean 7 months. Thats 7 paydays I've not paid to a casino and honestly its great. I can afford things, im not borrowing or begging family or friends for a bail out...my debts have also significantly reduced. Life is much better when you stop.
Take a look at - https://www.gamcare.org.uk/talk/
Blocking software was a game changer for me along with talking therapy. I wish you the best!
That's a solid story @bm241pin5d I wonder if I would of recovered quicker if I had done therapy. Clean for 2 years now but took me 8 years to get to that.
This post from the chap above shows what's at stake and if he wants recovery and tools to help him stop they are freely here for him.Â
I hope he sees you're story and replies.
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Dave101
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