My story

Take stock. Realise you have family and friends who need you.

Stop gambling!!!! Put an absolute end to it! It's tough but you can do it day at a time.

Read this forum every 48 hours without fail. Peoples similar stories will inspire you.

It must end. Today is the first step on that journey!!! Good luck!

Thegerman wrote:

Take stock. Realise you have family and friends who need you.

Stop gambling!!!! Put an absolute end to it! It's tough but you can do it day at a time.

Read this forum every 48 hours without fail. Peoples similar stories will inspire you.

It must end. Today is the first step on that journey!!! Good luck!

Thanks for the reply and you are right in what you say. The sheer hatred I have for myself as a result of this is huge at the moment.

Hi SteDow,

Good on you for signing up. I had a rough week back at the beginning of the month and have been 16 days clean now. Thought I'd share some of the things that have helped me.

Firstly what is it that you gamble on? For me it was FOBT machines so I went into the bookies by work (where I would go) and self excluded from all the shops in the local area. I'd definitely recommend it as it just removes the possibility of going in. I've also suspended all of my online accounts which does the same thing. I know some guys on here use K9 blocker software which apparently helps.

Also I think using this forum helps a lot. Just being able to read everyone's stories and learn from mistakes they've unfortunately made is very helpful. I also have placed a lot of emphasis on how many days I've gone gamble free. I'm fully determined not to have to reset it to 0 days.

All the best and do keep posting. You'll find it really helps to hear other similar people's views.

Unstoppable

unstoppable14 wrote:

Hi SteDow,

Good on you for signing up. I had a rough week back at the beginning of the month and have been 16 days clean now. Thought I'd share some of the things that have helped me.

Firstly what is it that you gamble on? For me it was FOBT machines so I went into the bookies by work (where I would go) and self excluded from all the shops in the local area. I'd definitely recommend it as it just removes the possibility of going in. I've also suspended all of my online accounts which does the same thing. I know some guys on here use K9 blocker software which apparently helps.

Also I think using this forum helps a lot. Just being able to read everyone's stories and learn from mistakes they've unfortunately made is very helpful. I also have placed a lot of emphasis on how many days I've gone gamble free. I'm fully determined not to have to reset it to 0 days.

All the best and do keep posting. You'll find it really helps to hear other similar people's views.

Unstoppable

Thanks for that advice Unstoppable, it is much appreciated.

i only gamble on sport. I've never gambled on FOBTs or on any casino games. I've self excluded from a number of betting sites over the last 3 weeks as I had a big loss 3 weeks ago. Stupidly I relapsed today and lost that 1400 which I really couldn't afford to lose and I'm really annoyed with myself and now acknowledge the fact that I have a problem which needs resolving. I imagine giving up totally will be very tough but I simply cannot afford to keep losing money at that rate.

That's great news that you've self excluded. Perhaps if you gamble online then getting software to ban all sites is the way to go.

Today is your new day 1, remember the date and keep trying to add 1 to your days clean.

unstoppable14 wrote:

That's great news that you've self excluded. Perhaps if you gamble online then getting software to ban all sites is the way to go.

Today is your new day 1, remember the date and keep trying to add 1 to your days clean.

Yes, I need to look into doing that. I guess like most gamblers, the urge to bet will always be there but it can be managed by putting things in place which make it more difficult to bet. My main problem I think is in lumping on games in an impulsive manner. By having that blocking software I should be able to prevent myself doing that as there is no way I'd physically take 1400 in cash and place a bet with it. When you bet online, as ridiculous as it sounds, the money seems less real as it is just numbers on a screen. The reality however is that that money has to be earned and 1400 is more than a week's salary. I really need to use this feeling I have at the moment to stop this madness.

Mate it's all about taking each day as it comes. I am in a similar boat to yourself as FOBT roulette has played absolute havoc with my life and finances recently. I completely understand the guilt/anger/numbness you feel at where you are now financially and where you should be. Being well paid is great but only if you get to enjoy it. You like me sound like you have become a slave to gambling. It's time to reclaim your life. I'm sure losing has left your emotions all over the place and moods very up and down. If it's any consolation I'm back cold turkey after a day of madness on the FOBT's last week. I lost £500 in an hour! I'm trying to use my anger at that to keep motivated. Take each day as a personal challenge. I'm only at the start of my recovery journey so jump aboard and hopefully in a few weeks things will look a lot more positive!

Cheers Huskydawg. Yes, it has left me feeling pretty low to be honest. I'm glad it's a bank holiday today as I wouldn't be very productive in work the way I'm feeling right now.

You're also right about being well paid. It's no point if as soon as you get your salary you've wasted most of it on a stupid bet. I think the only way is to completely abstain from all forms of gambling as hard as that is. It's not ideal that I'm on a stag do next weekend which nvolves a day at the races on Saturday. As I'm the best man I can't not go to that.

Going to the racing is not ideal but you can still go and enjoy the craic without betting. Maybe you should challenge yourself and use it as a test of your resolve. Explain to your mates the situation you find yourself in. They may understand and help you trough the day. Maybe a day of watching people bet and not partaking in the activity will give you a different perspective!

Huskydawg wrote:

Going to the racing is not ideal but you can still go and enjoy the craic without betting. Maybe you should challenge yourself and use it as a test of your resolve. Explain to your mates the situation you find yourself in. They may understand and help you trough the day. Maybe a day of watching people bet and not partaking in the activity will give you a different perspective!

Yes, that's what I was thinking. At the moment the last thing I want to do is bet but I felt like that 3 weeks ago as well and then within a few days I recaptured the bug. I think what I'll do at the races is not take my phone with me and only take enough cash for drinks. That should then stop me being able to bet. I've self excluded from most of my betting sites now which has to be a step in the right direction. Some are harder than others to self exclude easily from though which is annoying.

The problem with gambling is that it takes over your life, your free time, your thoughts. It consumes your day to day living. You may find it liberating to just enjoy the atmosphere and the beers without the pressure of needing or wanting to bet. If you manage to get through that day mate then you will have made a great starting to reclaiming your life. Look at it like that. Then if you stay on the wagon reward yourself by going for a meal or the cinema as a treat. As I said before take each day as it comes. Educate yourself on what your triggers are to gamble. Think of the gambling pyramid where you have 3 components needed to gamble Time, Money and Location. Take one of those 3 away and you can't gamble.

Huskydawg wrote:

The problem with gambling is that it takes over your life, your free time, your thoughts. It consumes your day to day living. You may find it liberating to just enjoy the atmosphere and the beers without the pressure of needing or wanting to bet. If you manage to get through that day mate then you will have made a great starting to reclaiming your life. Look at it like that. Then if you stay on the wagon reward yourself by going for a meal or the cinema as a treat. As I said before take each day as it comes. Educate yourself on what your triggers are to gamble. Think of the gambling pyramid where you have 3 components needed to gamble Time, Money and Location. Take one of those 3 away and you can't gamble.

Cheers for all your comments. I think my triggers to gamble irresponsibly (I.e. with stakes I can't afford to lose) tend to be twofold: firstly if I've had a few beers then on occasion I have placed much bigger bets than I had planned to so the solution there seems to be to avoid any type of betting whilst drinking and secondly as with most people the desire to chase losses has often led to me betting huge sums for relatively little return which is just destructive and so the solution there seems to be just to stop altogether as any time I have a loss of any decent size I'll want to win it back quickly.

I often wish I'd never started doing this. Unlike a lot of people here I never actually started betting until I was 28 when I was made redundant from my first job. I was given a very large redundancy payoff and was bored at home so started gambling as a way to pass the time and to try to earn extra cash. In the early days though my bets were always pretty small (never more than about 200 quid and often less than 100). The last 3 years however have seen my betting escalate to the point where bets in excess of 1000 have become commonplace and that has led probably inevitably to me wiping my savings out. It's just stupid.

Feeling pretty guilty about my stupidity now. Fuming with myself for putting myself in a financial position which means that I'll have to watch the pennies this month. For someone earning the type of money I earn this is seriously pathetic.

Guilt is my biggest problem however I think it may also be the biggest road block on my road to recovery. The more I dwell on things the more likely I am to relapse into gambling behaviour. What's gone is gone and what's done is done. It's good to look back and remember but not to dwell. If you stop gambling now the money lost in the past will become immaterial through time. More importantly you will be on the road to reclaiming your life. I have about £9000 in debt which is down to playing online roulette/FOBTs. I have set myself a personal challenge to clear that in 12-15 months. I want to clear it, as I feel once I have, then I will truly be able to move on. We all make mistakes, but you haven't harmed anyone but yourself. What's important is learning from our mistakes and although it may seem like a harsh lesson now, in reality in the scale of things it's a drop in the ocean.