New Year's Day challenge!!!

Change wrote:

Had some negative thoughts this morning so just posting here to check in again and get through this next stretch of recovery.

What type of negative thoughts did you have? People on my diary tell me to write it all down

Hi pal - negative thoughts about dealing with life situations and re thinking over the mistakes I've made in the past. I'm not really struggling with urges to gamble as I am struggling with depression and it's all compounded by the fact that I know my stresses would be some what eased if I'd never gambled. Certain days or weeks are worse and I go through a mental battle of convincing myself that it'll be alright in the end when really deep down I don't know that for sure. We're all one day away from making everything much worse and that's a concern in itself. I am finding that I'm incredibly impatient and can't wait for tomorrow. I need solutions now but they won't arrive. I'm goal orientated and right now I don't have a date and time to reach that goal as dealing with this addicition doesn't work like that - there's not a day to achieve when you're cured or can relax, it just continues indefinitely. I struggle with not being 'normal' so I can sit in a room full of people feeling sorry for myself thinking 'why me'. All-in I really just need to toughen up, forget about the past and make a new future rather than struggle through each day. I don't really know where this post is going as I'm just dumping down all the thoughts in my mind. I guess I just hope that one day I can be 'normal' again whatever that means. Not needing to carry around mental baggage would be a start as right now that's weighing me down significantly.

I'm still going but finding it pretty dam tough at the moment. Having thoughts about fobts and one last spin etc just trying to keep busy with things and hoping it'll pass. Think this is the furthest I've came so really don't want to throw it away. Stay safe everyone 🙂

Hope you're hanging in there still new beginnings - don't give in to the demon! Stay safe pal and hit me back just to chat if you think you need to...

You ever get a song in your head all day because you've caught it somewhere during the day... I've got a song by Jamie Lawson - "I wasn't expecting that" on repeat in my head. It's a great song if a little sad but it's added some great perspective to me today...

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y-lI_tgQMMk

Change wrote:

Hi pal - negative thoughts about dealing with life situations and re thinking over the mistakes I've made in the past. I'm not really struggling with urges to gamble as I am struggling with depression and it's all compounded by the fact that I know my stresses would be some what eased if I'd never gambled. Certain days or weeks are worse and I go through a mental battle of convincing myself that it'll be alright in the end when really deep down I don't know that for sure. We're all one day away from making everything much worse and that's a concern in itself. I am finding that I'm incredibly impatient and can't wait for tomorrow. I need solutions now but they won't arrive. I'm goal orientated and right now I don't have a date and time to reach that goal as dealing with this addicition doesn't work like that - there's not a day to achieve when you're cured or can relax, it just continues indefinitely. I struggle with not being 'normal' so I can sit in a room full of people feeling sorry for myself thinking 'why me'. All-in I really just need to toughen up, forget about the past and make a new future rather than struggle through each day. I don't really know where this post is going as I'm just dumping down all the thoughts in my mind. I guess I just hope that one day I can be 'normal' again whatever that means. Not needing to carry around mental baggage would be a start as right now that's weighing me down significantly.

I wont give advice because im not that far in recovery.

But people say that when you stop gambling you think about the things you have tried to block. I guess money , losses and the mistakes made are some of the thoughts/feelings that have to be addressed.

From what i read thinking about the money lost delays our recovery process. Accept your current position and take it from there

The cogs are slowly turning to a better place... keep the faith people!

* For you change, you are coming through the tough ride of recovery.

I went on a bender but got a grip and have been gamble free for 4 days. All avenues closed and exclusions in place.

I had to do something as my PTSD was on self destruct meltdown and was only harming myself.

Its a tough journey, I can not stop thinking about gambling somedays however when we get addicted we lose

all sense of what is normal because we lose normal in a mist.

I am still on this challenge. i failed, i have comeback.

Send all on here positive thoughts to keep fighting

Anything I can do to help just let me know?! You've got the stop the gamble stop gamble stop gamble stop cycle. Welcome back to the challenge. Embrace it and keep posting. I sometimes run out of things to say and just ramble. I'd happily listen to your rambles. Stay safe and keep the faith.

*

This sounds like an interestinf thread to be part of.

Change you said how our journey does not have a day when we are cured, it continues indefinitely.
thats a real downer to be honest but all we can do is not bet and each day is an achievement isnt it.

Chins up people

Mba

Yeah sorry about that mba - had a tough week but I'm coming round. I'm absolutely committed to this recovery so there's no turning back for me. I want better for me, my wife, my son and my dog. There are going to be ups and downs but there's only one direction this is heading and it's forward. Please join in as I know you'll be a valuable contributor.

Well done UO great achievement and yes I'll join this challenge and am currently on 19 days.

May just make 90 days by 31st December im not sure exactly but i will make 90+ days regardless

Hope everyone has staying safe this weekend. Day 100 for me this week. It's a good start but got to keep going. Let me know how you're all coping? Monday tomorrow and another week.

* To your 100 days this week change ! How far you have come since that dark spell.

I am 7 days clear still. Finding it tough but then we wouldnt be here if we did not have an addiction.

Keep going everyone.

Well done Change thts a great achievement and well done to the other people posting.

Checkin in on Day 13