Still Gambling

You state "I've got enough stuff going on on". Gambling to you maybe a form of "release" mechanism. You may suffer from low self esteem and when you win it makes you feel better about yourself for a while. It maybe when you have no spare money that you feel no urge to gamble. It may not bother you too much. When you get hold of money the urge to gamble becomes vey strong ? I've gambled more when I've been desperate for money and sometimes I've won and walked away. More often I've lost and walked away feeling very desolate. If I were you I'd put a paid for block on all your devices (if you gamble online). Call Gamcare for counselling in order to discuss your feelings. I've got the blocks on and have had the urges but I can't physically gamble. I can't get around the paid for block so that's that. I don't think there is a miracle "cure" but preventing gambling is most of the battle.

Ta

Everything you've said is bang on and I have too much to lose if my girlfriend finds out I'm gambling again. I've had my wages go into her bank for months now and been fine but the moment I've got a bit of money to myself there's only one thing on my mind, it's like someone else tales over my mind, it does make me feel good when I win but the feeling of a loss outweighs that by some distance. I do need counselling, it will raise suspicions with the girlfriend but it has to be done. I can't be trusted with money, at the end of the day. Simple as that.

I've got a really bad sinking feeling in the put of my stomach today, I don't know of its guilt, self pity or both. I hate keeping things from my girlfriend, I was gambling while sat in the same room as her last night, I know it would ruin us if she found out, I'm trying my hardest to take comfort in the fact that I am not overspending, even though I couldn't if I tried.

I have a busy weekend coming up, I've no money in my account so I couldn't gamble anyway. I have some important selection tests on Monday to join the RAF. That should be my main focus, getting ready for it. At the moment what I lost lastnight if weighing me down so much, I need to snap out of it quick time.

Hi Paul,

I think you need to tell your girlfriend, she can support you. Give her more control with the money. Get her to give you cash, give her full access to your account. I've just recently done this and my husband can check everything I'm doing, self exclude from all sites. If you can't have access to gambling sites you can do it especially if you don't have the money in the bank to do so.

Speak to her, she'll help you, you can't do it alone, you can stop! The reason you feel like c**P is because you are not telling the truth you know it's wrong, Lying will just eat you up inside. Trust me I've been there.

Kirsty x

Thanks for your advice Kirsty, I've decided not to tell her even though I know it's wrong it would be the end of us, I have too much to lose, I knew this before I gambled again so I try to put myself in her shoes and she'll think I don't care and that I'm being selfish.

The money I lost, I'd worked hard for, she didn't know I had, neither did I as I got more in my monthly wage than expected. She has control of all our money now, I feel like she will give me access again soon but I'm not going to let her do that, simply can't trust myself.

I'm finding it hard to get over the loss but I know it's gone and there's nothing I can do about it, I can at least take comfort in the fact that all my wage wasn't blown, she'd got most of it.

I know it 1000's of pound this time but the feeling is the always the same, I will manage to drop one day, I need to stop relapsing and get a new bank card I can't make online purchases from.

Thanks again for your advice, very much appreciated.

hi , back on th forum after a major setback , one of many, as i approach the 20th anniversary of the exact day that gambling started to become a problem for me .

i've tried to say to myself i'll stop after blowing £xxxx that's IT, it never worked.

i've tried to say i'll stop after i turn 40, 10 years ago, it didn't work

i tried to stop after i turned 50 , last year . Still gambling .

not every day, but every time i have some spare time and/or spare money ,

well you all know the feeling ... how can those days turn into weeks, into months, etc. ?

ps.. do we get auto email notifications that someone has replied to us? also, i'm sure this site is not secure .. does anyone know about this ? thanks.