Hey everyone im back again on the forums after a horrible spell of gambling once again. I have vowed to quit so many times now and went back its just becoming tiresome. I am now back into my overdraft by 1000 and still bills to pay. I have a holiday in 26 days which I was planning to take 500 with and is looking increasingly unlikely I will have that kind of spending money for it. Just 2 weeks ago I won 800, I have told my friends about this so everyone thinks I have lots of money now. I spent 460 and gambled all the rest away. I have taken things from the house to sell for money as I have had none, lied to people over financial issues. I have told my mam in the past about this but feel going back to her a second time will make her hate the person I have become. I am starting to think this will never change and was wondering if anyone has gone through the same thing. I want to travel the world, see some amazing countries and feel the only way I can get the funds quickly is gambiling (this is why I do it in part). I hate the person I have become and have never felt so low in my life. I want to stop this more than anything but I am losing the will to keep going. Thankyou for reading
Hi Dalomatic, welcome back to the Forum,
I gambled for twenty years before stopping over five years ago; I thought for a long time, just like you are, that things were never going to change, but they do and they can my friend.
You have to be honest with yourself; imagine you won enough money to see every country in the world that you ever dreamed of; there is it, imagine holding every penny in your hands - the next step is booking it, so you do, and then you leave in six weeks.
The big question is, could you go six weeks without touching that money? Could you really, suddenly develop a capacity to stop, zero tolerance, for a lengthy period of time and then actually use the money you've won?
That would be extremely unlikely to the point of being virtually impossible my friend - the euphoria you experience would make you crave feeling that way again; thoughts of your holiday would pale into insignificance compared with the strength of the urges you would experience after such a large win.
It is always going to be that way for you. me and everyone else here my friend. Winning is actually more dangerous than losing because, with losing, there is more of a chance we would stop at some point.
Change your way of thinking and be honest with yourself my friend - if you best hope is to lose small and walk away, then why bother? Why bother even thinking about it?
You haven't changed as a person - gambling makes you do bad things, and act in a way that is alien to you but you are still the same as you have always been; the problem is that, after a while, people only see the bad side of you and that will be all they know in the time to come if you don't stop. They, and you, deserve so much better than that endgame my friend.
Draw a line under what has happened and do what you can for the holiday; you cannot make it any worse than what it is now if you stop gambling until then.
As you said, you have never felt so low in your life; this is what must stay with you if you think about gambling my friend - nothing is worth the way you feeling right now, nothing, no gaming, no winnings (which is more dangerous than losing as I said) no nothing; times are tough, but you are still in a position to turn things around - value it, cherish it my friend.
JamesP
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