Weekly Topic - "Acceptance"

I spent many years pretending I accepted I had an addiction. 

I accepted that I had an addiction but dangerously thought I could tame it by "controlled" gambling...Reality was I was actually in denial of what I'd become. 

Now I've accepted that gambling cannot be part of my life. I've accepted I have an addiction and any little bit of temptation I'll be back in ruin.

Hi

Acceptance and surrender sounds like we are being weak.

I now understand the simple fact that when we walk in to the meetings for the first time that is a sign of healthy strength.

In time I would understand that I was a very emotionally vulnerable person who needed to heal the hurt inner child in me, that was Acceptance and surrender.   

Sharing with healthy people like minded people in the recovery program would open my mind to so many healthy possibilities.

Even though we may not feel that way.

Once we get committed to therapies and open up emotionally we learn to articlate our self in much healthier ways.

We get to understand our unhealthy reactions to people life and situations.

For me my unhealthy reactions only indicated how much pain I was living in.

Having unreasonable expectations of people life and situations I was in effect hurting my self and causing my self more pains.

I am not able to change other people or the world.

In time I would understand that I am abale to learn how to heal my pains.

I am how ever unable to heal other peoples pains.

No matter how much more aware I am of other people being unhealthy I am not able to change those people.

In time I would learn to love my self, only then could I love other people.

In time I would learn to respect my self, only then could I respect other people.

Some times just by talking with people in healthy ways a healthy emotional intimacy can take place.

When I first started talking about the different levels of abuse I had gone through it was very difficult.

Then once the hurt inner child in me healed talking about any level of abuse was very simple and no longer painful.

Acceptance and surrender to the simple fact I was a very unhealthy emotionally vulnerable person.

Once I got mroe honest with my self my fears reduced and my trust grew.

Once I got in to my recovery I thought it would get so much simpler.

The truth was peopel and events would happen that would test my steel and my recovery.

How I deal with the harder parts in my life today demonstrates how far I am in to my recovery.

The funny thing was I left school at 15 years of age with no qualifications what so ever.

And now today I take on daily challenges which impresses me.

One we heal our hurt inner child there is so much potential in us we did not know about or understand.

Today I am no longer an emotional loner.

I found that emotional intimacy is all part of the healthy healing process.

Dave L

AKA Dave of Beckenham

Hi @bm241pin5d ,

Thank you for responding to the weekly topic and sharing your experience!

Going through those different stages of acceptance is a journey itself and can take its time to get to that point where we can acknowledge and accept something is affecting/impacting us.

It can be tough but you've been able to come to that acceptance that gambling can't be a part of your life. This shows a lot of strength and motivation in you and your journey.

Again, thank you for sharing. We really appreciate it!

All the best,

Fay

Online Peer Support Team

Hi @gadaveuk ,

Thank you for your post!

As you mentioned, acceptance is a strength! It takes a lot of motivation to accept something that may be negatively impacting us/our lives and then focusing on and working towards changing that. 

It can take time to get there, but as you mentioned as part of your experience, having support can really make a difference.

I can imagine it was very tough for you at the time. You have put in incredible effort into your recovery that you are able to now take on daily challenges. You should be very proud of yourself! 

Again, thank you for sharing.

All the best,

Fay

Online Peer Support Team