Hi everyone,
Welcome to the Forum’s new topic!
We have heard your feedback, so we will be regularly posting new topics to give you the chance to reflect on your journey so far. We will be including content around topics such as gambling harms research, news articles, reflections from GamCare staff, and more.
This week’s topic is identity. Our identity is our sense of self or the understanding of “who we are”, that includes our memories, experiences, relationships, and values.
This is important as when we are not behaving in a way that feels true to ourselves and our identity, it can cause us significant stress. In fact, it can be argued that authenticity is “a cornerstone of mental health…. As one of three basic psychological needs”.
You can read more about identity and authenticity here: https://www.psychologytoday.com/gb/basics/identity#:~:text=Identity%20encompasses%20the%20memories%2C%20experiences,and%20incorporated%20into%20on e's%20identity.
So, what are your thoughts?
Has your story so far affected your sense of identity?
Do you feel you are living as the “real” you?
We would love to hear your reflections below.
All the best,
Lulu
Online Peer Support Team
Now im a lot further down the line of being on gamcare i am very proud of who i am, my identity, i feel like the authentic adam, the one i ws before i found drugs, alcohol, smoking and gambling, all these vices that are marketed towards us to make us feel different thn our sober selves doesnt help.
I feel like now i can be the best version of myself....an adam version 2.0 the best saved copy lol
I came here in 2015 and i identified with people in pubs and clubs,....i spent time thinking about poker and all my social life and much of my work life revolved around it....and its fair to say it didnt get me anywhere.
I put on a lot of weight my breathing and lungs were in a poor state.....i hardly slept...and i couldnt concentrate or put in too much effort at work.....
In 2015 i decided to start a spreadsheet to look at my spending and after bills just on socialising and gambling of my 1200 net wage id spent an average of over 600 pounds a month....and that was whilst only really getting one drink when i was out... i thought right ill analyse this more and do something about it.
Now its improved each year since then my identity and how i feel about myself has dramatically improved.
Ive not smoked since 2016, i've not drunk since 2018, i've not gambled since 2019 and i've lost a bit of weight too and my lungs and breathing is soo much better. I am doing better at work as a result. I don't go out to pubs anymore.....and generally instead of spending that 600 pounds each month i save it.
With the time away from these vices i spend more time with friends and family....i feel more confident and am more of a asset for work.
If ur reading this thinking i cant do that....you sure can...i came here and the only way i started and carried on after 2 years on here failing (2015-2018) to stop my vices.....i firstly didn't believe i could ever stop smoking...i bought some nicotine gum then the rest is history....then i thought everyone has to drink sometimes....not me i never do now and i never make those poor drunken decisions now either....u can do this.....
BE the best version of yourself.....
someone at work took me to one side today and said "i'm soo proud of you and everything you've gone thru you're soo brave well done"......That meant the world to me......
None of us are perfect and these businesses market these vices towards us and its soo socially accepted.... and peer pressure when we are young bring them towards us....but i firmly believe the best version of myself is spent away from them firmly working hard, resting hard, and enjoying the world in all its beauty with our loved ones.
All the best lets make 2024 the best year yet
Adam123 xxxx
Hi @adam123,
Thank you so much for sharing your experience and your reflections about how you are now living as your authentic self. Your story shows your hard work and commitment to changing things, and is inspiring to read!
This also highlights how identity includes our social identity, meaning the groups of people we feel connected to or are most similar to us. Research has found that social identity is related to life satisfaction, self-esteem, and psychological wellbeing (Pirutinsky & Mancuso, 2011). If anyone would like to read some of the research, it is available here: https://journals.library.columbia.edu/index.php/gsjp/article/download/10852/5381/27342
Thanks again for the reflections, and we welcome anyone else's thoughts on identity and their story so far!
Take care,
Lulu
Online Peer Support Team
We are available 24 hours a day, every day of the year. You can also contact us for free on 0808 80 20 133. If you would like to find out more about the service before you start, including information on confidentiality, please click below. Call recordings and chat transcripts are saved for 28 days for quality assurance.
