What made you start gambling after abstaining

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(@Anonymous)
Posts: 0
Topic starter
 

Hi folks

I've noticed that a few people on here manage to abstain for quite a while and then suddenly have a huge splurge which sets them back to square one. I wondered what was the thinking behind this, if any? For example, did you suddenly think you could have a big win or was it that you thought you were 'cured' and could manage it .... or did you know it would end up back in disaster but couldn't stop yourself? Jusr curious.

Blue x

 
Posted : 1st June 2015 8:15 pm
Black26
(@huskydawg)
Posts: 170
 

For me it is a combination of forgetting over time how distraught gambling makes me feel and triggers pushing me off the wagon. Time is a great healer but sometimes it's good to remember how negative and destructive gambling can make you feel.

 
Posted : 1st June 2015 8:21 pm
Black26
(@huskydawg)
Posts: 170
 

For me it is a combination of forgetting over time how distraught gambling makes me feel and triggers pushing me off the wagon. Time is a great healer but sometimes it's good to remember how negative and destructive gambling can make you feel.

 
Posted : 1st June 2015 8:24 pm
Tom1995
(@tom1995)
Posts: 8
 

Mine ranges from boredom , to being put in the situatiion accidentally like going to a casino with friends after a night out when you think its under control and one spin brings it all back.

 
Posted : 1st June 2015 8:35 pm
(@Anonymous)
Posts: 0
 

For me it was watching my best friend stick £20 into a fobt after I told him "don't be so stupid, I'm so proud of myself that I'm not like you" - I then watched him win £1,240! AND WITHDRAW!!! (Something I could never do!)

It was a Saturday and I'd spent a great afternoon with him in the pub, I don't get much chance to hang out with him anymore due to wives/kids/work etc. We both used to gamble too much back in the day, but he could always handle it whereas I'd get the sweats and bet till my card was declined or head exploded!

I went back to my flat and felt like embarrassed and stupid for trying to sound like Mary Whitehouse or some Salvation Army sort of bore shaking my fist about "the evils of gambling" as he shook his grand of bank notes at me. So I thought, "you always get a big win when you sign up to a new site, that's how they suck you in. I'm clever, I'll just get the big win and stop".

Drunk, I joined a site I hadn't self-excluded from. Deposited £50, got a £100 bonus.

Played roulette, won £300 by the time I thought "keep it real, withdraw". (I felt really proud of myself that I'd stayed in control and tried to withdraw)

Tried to withdraw. Nope. Waging bonues requirement, yap yap yap...

Played again. Lost it all.

Felt aggrieved they'd "stolen" my money!

Deposited another £50.

Lost.

Another.

Lost.

Realised when I walked to the kitchen to open another bottle of wine and take a leak I'd just lost nearly £200. Got scared, but remembered my mate who'd just won over a grand with twenty pound. Convinced myself that with another final £50 I'd win the muthaload and then could stop and say to myself thank god I perservered and didn't quit!

Lost.

At this point I went insane and deposited nearly £800 until my card was declined because I had no more money left in the world.

Considered suicide, but realised I still had some wine left and it would be a shame to waste it, so came onto Gamcare and posted. (For real)

Molehole

 
Posted : 1st June 2015 8:45 pm
(@Anonymous)
Posts: 0
Topic starter
 

Oh Molehole. That is so brave of you to post that, and totally nails it on the head. I'm hoping this thread will be a reminder for those who are tempted about the reality of what will happen.

 
Posted : 1st June 2015 8:52 pm
(@Anonymous)
Posts: 0
 

Thanks Bluebella33 - it's not brave to speak the truth though, I honestly wouldn't wish how I felt that night on my worst enemy. I've always received amazing support from folk on this site when I've screwed up, so it's only right I try to say something real when I see a post that connects with me. My life is so much happier and peaceful when I don't gamble, but it's so hard for me to remember that in the moment when I feel the need to go for broke.

I hope you are doing well. Mx

 
Posted : 1st June 2015 9:02 pm
(@Anonymous)
Posts: 0
 

I agree with all here combination of forgetting that feeling, feeling in control, a few wins will do that. But yes the feeling you get after going to the declined card is truly horrendous. I've had it decline and then a simple transfer of funds and boom off I went again. The chase and go for broke feelings are very strong and scary phenomenon. I hope I can stay clear now as the time I spent away from gambling was my happiest in years

 
Posted : 1st June 2015 9:37 pm
(@Anonymous)
Posts: 0
 

Hi

I have had two periods of both a year and a half gambling free but have gone back. THe first time i planned it and went to a casino and lost a lot of money but the second time came up suddenly and wandered back into a bookies and went back to square one.

Im like the other poster i think i lost touch with how bad i become. Coupled with extra stress and free time and its not a good combination.

 
Posted : 4th June 2015 4:00 pm
(@Anonymous)
Posts: 0
 

I went 6 years. When I started again I managed to get myself into Gamcare counselling and managed another 4 years. Then I won a couple of decent contracts and we had a bit in savings. But we wanted a big party for our wedding anniversary. It was going to leave us a bit short, so I thought I could control myself and have a quick try. I could afford to lose the initial grand. Now I have spent every penny and have a £8k credit card debt. It all seems like a bad dream. A couple of times I came a short step away from breaking free -but would I really? If I had broken even wouldn't i have thought -just one more while I am on a lucky streak? Probably. The only way for me is no way. Never again. I have installed protection and will be accountable to someone (wife if she sticks by me) for my money every day from now on.

 
Posted : 4th June 2015 4:21 pm
(@Anonymous)
Posts: 0
Topic starter
 

Hi peetee

That is a very sobering post and shows that it is the same result whether you abstain for 1 month, 1 year or even 10 years. Once you start you cannot stop until you reach rock bottom. I think it is keeping that at the forefront that works for me, that it is a self fulfilling thing when you start ... you know where it will end so don't even go there.

Would love to hear from anyone else what made them lapse and how they recovered?

 
Posted : 6th June 2015 8:49 pm
(@Anonymous)
Posts: 0
 

I was gamble free for about 3 years after a suicide attempt.

I was then made redundant.

Whoopie!!!

Truthfully, I loved gambling, as well as hated it. I think I was just waiting for an 'excuse' to justify having another bet. That bust lasted about 6 months, even though I was still attending GA. In the end I realised that if i continued to gamble, to continue with all the misery that a gamblers life is, I would attempt the deed again, and this time I would not fail. I chose to stop gambling.

It has been harder the second time around. Probably because I didn't reach the lows that I had previously.

Best wishes to all in recovery

 
Posted : 7th June 2015 1:25 pm
(@Anonymous)
Posts: 0
 

with me its the depression i suffer from so its 100 times harder for me to give up for good then the rest of you! so just think how much easier it is for you all compared to me! lost 350 last night and 3 weeks before that i lost 1200!

 
Posted : 7th June 2015 2:02 pm
(@Anonymous)
Posts: 0
 

sorry all, its just i feel so low atm.

 
Posted : 7th June 2015 2:04 pm
(@Anonymous)
Posts: 0
 

yeah it is terrible all these bookie staff and that!

 
Posted : 7th June 2015 7:02 pm
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