Been giving a lot of thought to this question recently and my view is recovery is complete when you have had no gambling problems for a long period and crucially you are not dependant on anything else as a support crutch.
So -
If you used GA, you no longer attend
if you had counselling, you don't any more
if you had someone carry money for you, you don't need someone to do that now
if you self-excluded, you can now go into the self-excluded premises or another equivalent and it doesn't cause a problem
if you used gamblock on a computer, you don't need it now
if you used this Forum, you don't need it now
all of the above are great tools to help recovery, but none should be needed on a permanent basis so I think recovery is complete when you can say you don't need any of them. ( for me I am still on here but much less than I used to be, none of the others which I used now apply, I'm using that as a measure of my recovery.
I also believe it is necessary to widen the net however and ensure that having eradicated gambling problems, you haven't just swapped one addiction for another - drink, smoking, drugs etc. Fortunately I don't drink, smoke or do drugs so none of that was ever going to apply for me.
No point someone saying they don't gamble anymore but being drunk every other night or spaced out on drugs. An addict is using their addiction to escape from reality so swapping gambling for something else will help them financially but not as an addict and as a person.
Hi Captain
This is a really interesting topic and one which I to have pondered recently.
It isn't really the actual gambling that needs solving its the ability to deal with the urges.
Different things appeal to different people - even within gambling some people are switched on by horse racing, some football betting, some machines. I am not sure gamblers are ever cured as if you find something appealing then you find it appealing and will probably do so for a lifetime (I suppose you could argue if the urge completely disappears you would be cured as no urge means no action but I think that is very rare).
What can be cured though is the way we learn to deal with the urges and having as many barriers in place for when they come along such as self exclusion or giving someone control of our money etc.
I used to love playing the roulette machine but self-excluded 3+ years ago - am I cured? Not at all as I know there will be times when I will fancy a go (not sure when) but because I have banned myself from all the local bookies I cannot act on the urge when they occur.
Appreciate I have rambled and overall am saying its rare the urges go away so you always need to be on the look out.
I agree there is little point replacing one bad activity with another as this just causes new things to deal with.
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For some who have dabbled in gambling there does seem to be 'recovery' and an end
For those who are addicted to gambling and are addicts not sure there is recovery or an end when gambling is all gone.
Gambling is a recognized addiction
Hi Captain, Hope your well mate. Not spoke since my first week on here. What a disaster that was. I know you was going through some difficulties following a relapse and was finding it difficult to cope. How are you doing? You keeping your chin up? intresting post above btw.
What an interesting and crucial question captain 46. I hope you are doing well
I know this is from 2014 but its just as relevant today, tomorrow and for ever that gambling exists.
After much thought and counselling I strongly believe that it is always within us even though its under strong control. I believe a certain set of circumstances could trigger it.
I wouldnt say its lurking on the surface and the thoughts are rare. I think about gambling when helping others here but Im not using the forum to counter urges. I dont have thoughts I plan on but it tends to be more instantly in the moment. Thats something that needs to be discussed
September time I lost my gold ring which for a miser like me was painful. It was my own stupid fault for wearing the ring while carrying a heavy holdall with a handle that would just slide my ring off. I was nearly off with that trigger. I was in the next town..... coming back from a training course...... I was stressed with the course, the ring and no blocks there...Nearly! Something random to do with my immediate location and the train times held me back there but it could have gone either way.
That was what about 280? days in. I discussed it with my parents and extended blocks to two more bookies around this town. Im not travelling to the course now but I realise that I must be blocked on all travelling routes and regular work areas.
Some work situation could haul me into a pub and somebody might be playing the machines...You know there are all sorts of situations that could crop up where my guard is down. The thing with machine playing is there was no logic rhyme or reason...winning a little bit seemed the only driving force I could put my finger on in the moment.( even though there is way more to it in terms of escaping) Also the anxiety of strange situations and a bad day is always there with me...one thing the machines were was an anxiety, loneliness and stress reliever in the moment even though they would empty my bank balance more often then not
Im not a rich man so just "winning a little bit" could always be a trigger until I earn more.
So I keep up the blocks and the monitoring. I will be renewing my blocks when they come up and believe I will have to prove myself for a long long time, possibly a lifetime.
I would be interested to know how alcoholics who stopped drinking, deal with something that society and the drinks companies are constantly promoting. They are very similar addictions in many ways
I tend to think that I can never be complacent. I take that in a positive way though and not a depressing way. This may be something that I have to discuss with people for the rest of my life. I was thinking the other day that its something I will mention to every new partner very early on....just that it could possibly be an issue but its well under control and they can help me keep it that way.
What do others think? Putting it that way sounds as though Im rattling all the time which is far from the case. I have many calm and busy days where I dont think about gambling at all
Perhaps what makes recovery complete is realising it will be a lifelong goal to reject gambling.
Best wishes to everyone on the forum
Some people gamble without it becoming a problem. I believe for the compulsive addict there is something much deeper to resolve than just the action of the addiction. There is something that has rooted itself in our minds that drives us to the addictive behavior regardless of the cost. Resolving the underlying problem and learning new healthy ways to deal with it, I believe would produce a good recovery. Coming to a place where one can have a life challenge, go through it and deal with it, without having to distract oneself with some vice or addiction. Coming to the place where there is no automatic drive to the addiction for a solution to your problem would be a good recovery IMO.
Many times i gambled when i was feeling upset or sad vs the times i felt like i needed to make some money.
When planning to make some money back i felt more in control somehow. When it was a more emotional low time, The urge would feel more aggressive and in a rush. I did not "want" to gamble In those moments, It was an absolute must gamble.
As in GA says we can only arrest the compulsive behavior and are never really free. A big part of me does not want to believe this. I want to believe that we can be completely healed of this disease someday. So far in my recovery however, the GA statement holds true.
I keep thinking about this.
GA have been around for a long time and they really do know what they are talking about. They have seen it and they have lived it just as we are doing to some extent on the forum
I think the best stage of recovery comes from a grace and a calmness to accept things are well under control but there is no room for complacency. The grace to accept it as a lifelong aim and to respect the power of a gambling addiction. I knew what it was capable of when full on so Im not going to think thats done and dusted then. I have a healthy fear and even respect for the power of its trigger points
Im just happy doing other things. I dont have to think about control like I'm struggling or have it locked in a cage. However Im wise enough to know with this addiction that complacency and over confidence are not good feelings to have here
Our feelings of expectation are primieval and genetic. They relate to survival and life itself in many ways. Its easy to see how gambling plays on our need to feel loved and indeed lucky in aspects of life. It can be a funny word luck....Do we make our own luck?
Im lucky shes with me.....and so on..... even though you may never actually have met if circumstances had been different in any way. There was a very interesting program on BBC4 about the probability of chance. Its deep rooted within us because probability and chance relate to living our lives.
Anyway I could have worded this better but its just my thoughts about a complete recovery.
Maybe its when youre lying on the death bed surrounded by the family and the day of judgement comes 🙂
Best wishes to everyone on the forum
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