Tonight im wondering where to turn, slowly slipping back to old ways, gettin myself straight then in a mess again, I've been a member of the forum and its good to talk, I've had counselling in the past, I no what they say and how to answer them by now, ive looked into ga but the meetings arent at times or locations I can really make, plus when I've used the ga site to chat I find it totally different to these forums and end up wound up with people that feel they're talking from a script, I could say I wanna stop betting but sometimes I like a bet, problem is I lose control of the situation, tonight for example I went to a bookies n went from £15 to a couple of hundred... Lost half went to walk out but then thought oh try again, til it was all gone, think I have some sort of emotional blockage I get annoyed when I do stuff like this, I just don't no what to do for the best, online im banned from 95% of places just the odd new one pops up, n im banned from my nearest bookies but just travel to another, like I need to keep an option open. I no all the thought processes hell I even no alot of the answers and can guide my mate to 4 months no betting, yet I cant listen to myself....
I am not good at this but when I get an urge, I tell a little f*** Off to the brain and I'm back on track what I was doing before i felt the urge.
Personally i see it as two teams of participants. The punters and the bookies. You'll have winners at time in your team but as a team the bookies ALWAYS wins.
Consider. Gambling is blood money, even if you win it all the money is cursed and will cause you very bad luck if it is in your possession. Gambling money is blood money because, many people have committed suicide trying to win. Others have lost their family and all their personal property. Having any money from gambling is a curse
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