A journal of the newbie recovering gambler

Hi Roxy,

Find your diary inspiring. I like to see sensible Roxy typing away.

Very true about blocks. I finally ended this merry go round I was stuck in all week and installed blocks on device this morning.  

It makes you think k what money we can save on and where to spend and how different it suddenly is when it turns ro gambling. 

To shame of mine..I have like 4 items in my cart for my project which I could easily bought few days ago..but no...let's save every penny...for then just to waste it on slots. There is no rationale at all..its madness...absolute madness.  

Now I'm 1k down, items still in my cart and even if I could buy them still, I am dragging my feet.thats ugly gambler in me, being selfish and not allowing to enjoy real things in life. Simple things..like a tap mixer for a bath 🤣...simple as that..

Well, at least I'm hoping I put the end to possible disasters for now. I hope I will go strength to strength. 

You're doing great! Set a goal, weekend away, long eyed garden swing and of course visiting your daughter...so much to do and see and enjoy..and you are so deserving of that!

I'll keep you posted with my mixer tap and other stuff in my basket. And my journey. ..back to the start for me today but a start for a long road ahead.

Stay safe x

Hi

Thank you for your post :). Sensible Roxy is typing this from a hillside in a forest in the beautiful Welsh valleys. Gambling roxy persuaded her to look for free spins earlier. Luckily sensible Roxy forced that weak gambler out of the door before she could deposit and to the forest at the end of the road. Enjoying the beauty and sounds of nature, the rushing water and birdsong. On previous walks I would have been sat here gambling, but thanks to gamban that's impossible, giving me the precious opportunity to enjoy this beautiful peace that is now descending. 

Well done for embarking on day one again. I have literally lost count of the day 1's I had when trying to quit smoking but I suspect I can count them in three figures.

Never give up giving up xx

My favourite recovery saying:

'Gamblers gamble to win the life they would have if they didn't gamble'

You are already seeing the benefits of having money and you've done this by simply not gambling. Well done

Stay strong 👍 

I love that saying weirdfish it's so true. 

Day 14 

If I make it through to the end of today it's two whole weeks! About three weeks ago I definitely couldn't imagine myself getting this far. The slots and casino sites still call out to me with their siren songs, trying to seduce and begile me through a constant bombarding combination of adverts, texts and emails. And I feel the urges wash over me like a physical pull that is so difficult to resist in the moment.

But.......... sensible Roxy is still in control. It doesn't matter if I win or how much I win, I will still give it all back. On the few occasions I've managed a big win and walked away, something always makes me go back the following day. So I NEVER win, that is the reality of the situation.

I was pleased to note this morning that my first thought was not of gambling, it was to come here, update my diary and see how everyone is doing.

Wishing everyone the strongest of wills xx