another marathon session

Everhopeful, Your diary is so moving, good luck in your recovery Teresa

Thanks again for your support I hope u r having a good day too an addiction free day ....always remain Everhopeful xxxx

Hi Hun

I think we used to chat on the forum and i remember you were such a source of support to me a couple of years back! Thank you for that. So sorry to hear of your loss and your relapses into gambling. I can well understand your frustration about returning to gambling. I have been there so often over the past few years. Just when you think you have finally beaten it, Wham Bam, you've lost your wages for the month and more. Keep up the good fight and i am glad to hear that you are managing to remain addiction free again. My thoughts are with you

Tel x

I m feeling so weak tonight and given half the chance I would go crazy and spend every penny we have on a slot or a game of bingo....thankfully I cant do that....I am banished and barred from every website so luckily the only damage I can do is maybe make a spelling mistake!!!

What I do need to do though is find a new action....something that makes me feel as excited and as nervous as a spin on a slot.......any ideas???

Well I have been overcome tonight I have been thinking about gambling for so many weeks now and my husband still gambles every day never to the extent I lose to but I have been seeing how much he enjoys it....anyway.....tonight I have been to a bingo hall the first time in ages and I have lost £780 .......I feel disgusted and empty....we have so many outings to attend this month...weddings and a concert and I have blown all our spare and the only reason I didnt spend anymore was because I was turfed out as the hall closed....o*g why am I losing the plot again....actually I think I may know a little of my trigger cos it is Vikki's 1st anniversary on 14th...but would that make me gamble I mean I feel sad all the time ....I am rambling!!! Going to bed because I have work tomorrow and dont want to be tired on top of everything else ....I mean I still have to explain to my Husband ...thats one promise I wont break....always being honest about the money situation.......remaining everhopeful that we all beat our gambling addiction xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Thanks for posting on my diary i think you understand how i feel about gambling,the excitment ect don't think there is anything that can replace the feeling but we cannot go on spending vasts amounts that we cannot afford.Sorry about your lapse,hope your husband is understanding if he gambles himself he should be.If you gamble at bingo halls have you tried only taking a small amout off cash with you and no bank cards?maybe this would work for you,

600 in an hour......1100 since Friday...ok not the most I have ever lost but feeling so disappointed in myself...why cant I get a grip of myself.......this week I have worked 7 days .....3 of them from 7 in the morning til 8 at night to get a bit of extra cash together and I have spent it on gambling before I have even got it...I hate gambling...I hate that it is in my face everywhere I turn and at the moment I hate myself and feel so desperately sad....

Remaining Everhopeful xxx

Hi you are alot like myself I have diaries from pretty much 2007-2014. But I only found recovery the last 8 months not a perfect recovery as I do thinks I skate on thin ice however no bet in 8 months for me is huge. But you have got to priortise recovery as no matter how hard you work with gambling in your life you are working for the bookie. Meetings and This place are a great start to any recovery you can do it.

Tonight I watched Panorama and it made me want to post.  I will always be a compulsive gambler and a gambling addict if my trigger is switched but I am so proud to say that in the last 4 years I have gambled sporadically.  I no longer feel compelled to sit for hours or days at a time online until I lose every last penny.  Through hard work and determination I no longer have any debt.  I feel blessed and free and I wish that feeling for every single person with an addiction.  I am not complacent though as it is a conscious decision everyday not to gamble and it will probably be like this for the rest of my life.

Good luck and dont be upset if you cant kick the habit the first time you try it took me 19 years to get into a position where I wanted to kick it!!

Thank you for letting me share, can I just ask how does everyone else feel about the amount of online gaming adverts that are around? 

Remaining Everhopeful that we have strength and courage to not gamble x x 

Posted by: everhopeful

 

Thank you for letting me share, can I just ask how does everyone else feel about the amount of online gaming adverts that are around? 

Remaining Everhopeful that we have strength and courage to not gamble x x 

 

It doesn't seem like that long ago when a betting shop couldn't have windows you could see through let alone covered in posters. It's incredible the speed gambling advertising has exploded everywhere. I could never imagine that a main stream channel would ever put something like a game of poker on the TV almost as a sport, but it's the best part of 20 years now since Late Night Poker was first screened, in effect creating one long advert for gambling at the time, and driving lots of people to the online poker sites, but at least for all misery it caused for some the programme was on late at night. And now what do we have apart from many other things, virtually every football team in the top 2 divisions with either their shirts, or pitch hoarding covered in nothing otherthan gambling adverts, on the TV at midday, afternoon and evening. So what do I think about it, dangerous, is he only word that springs to mind.

Stay strong Everhopeful, one day at a time.