April Fools!

Day 230.

So……… Last night, after reading some diaries on here, it got me thinking about gambling. In an instant, I was checking out non Gamstop online sites!! 🤷🏻‍♀️. I checked just one of them out and was quickly able to sign up. I sat staring at the “deposit now” screen, thinking, “Shall I, shan’t I, shall I shan’t I”???

I think the sudden reason for this was one, I have 6k sitting in my savings account, 2, I have just had to lay out more than double for my MOT and service (was totally ripped off I believe, being a woman on my own). I mean who does an MOT and puts 3 new tyres on your car without notifying you first AND I was told by one of the guys, that as I had driven less than 1000 miles in the last year, it only required an interim service. However, the guy I dropped it off with did a full service!!🤬🤬.

I also got a parking fine.  My own fault I know. I stopped off at a “pay and display” for 10 minutes and as I was racing back to my car, there was the warden slapping the sticker onto my screen. Lesson learned there. 😕.

Last Wednesday, I got home from work to a notification on my mobile banking app, informing me of a contactless payment that had just come out of my account for £185.00!! 😱. I was shocked and knew this was not me as at the time of the payment, I was actually sitting at my desk in work. After calling the bank immediately, it transpired that someone had used my card details for an online transaction with their apple wallet (which I don’t even have), in a supermarket in Holland!!😨.  I mean, how on earth does that happen???

After consulting with the bank and the fraud team for the last two days, I finally got my money put back into my account.  The questions I was asked were unbelievable, considering I was the innocent one in all this. I understand why they would have to ask such questions however.

I also received an email last week to inform that the windows that need replacing in our apartment block of 9 residents, is going to cost a staggering amount of money and that we will all be required to hand over, somewhere in the region of nearly 4k, just like that!🤬🤬. Of course, we had a residents meeting at my apartment with the management company and we had to do an anonymous vote. Long story short, it looks the work will be going ahead next spring regardless. 

My issue is that I have the funds BUT I am also having to fork out 6K for 3 implants, due to an ongoing infection in my gums, affecting 3 of my teeth 🙈. I also owe my sister some money, which part of my plans, were to start paying her back in January 2025 in 12 monthly instalments. Our management company has said that they can set up bespoke monthly payments for individuals, for those who don’t have the funds up front.

Sorry for the essay but I think all of the above, triggered what I did last night - signing up to a non Gamstop online site.

I stared at that deposit screen for 10 minutes, before telling myself the following:

- YOU WILL NOT WIN ANYMORE MONEY

-  THESE SITES ARE MORE HASSLE THAN THEY ARE WORTH

-  YOU HAVE COME SO FAR AT DISTANCING YOURSELF FROM THIS

-  YOU WILL NEVER FORGIVE YOURSELF

-  HOW CAN YOU FACE YOUR SISTER?

-  YOU COULD LOSE A LOT OF MONEY

-  YOU WILL BE RIDDLED WITH ANXIETY

Now for THE OUTCOME! I stared at that screen for a moment longer and thought to myself, “absolutely no chance”! I came off that site, went onto my online savings account and took a long look at my balance sitting safely there, gaining interest 👌.

Today, I reminded myself to just press the “reset button” and just breath my way through all the above, telling myself that “it will be ok, I will get through it and I have gotten my way through much worse 💪.

I have no inclination to visit that site again. I was shocked however, at just how easy it was to find non Gamstop sites.  Is there anything that can block anyone from accessing these? If so, please let me know as I want my blocks to remain strong and robust. More importantly, I want my mind to remain strong and robust and thankfully today, that has been the case.

Take care all.  “Look after your pennies and the pounds will look after themselves” - a quote my late Mum always used to say 😇.

”April fools - no more the fool”! 230 days and still counting 💪.

Pink Lady 🩷🍎.

Hello Pinklady!

Thank you for sharing that post, which I must say you have showed an incredible amount of strength and resilience to be able to walk away in the way that you did. Well done! You really should be proud of yourself for that. You have proven one very important thing, that you are in control of your own thoughts and future destiny and that you can say no, despite personal challenges you are facing right now. In the face of adversity, you are showing a real growth mindset and 230 days gamble free is some achievement. 

You have asked if there is anything to stop access to the international (Non Gamstop) websites, being as they are so easy to create accounts. I believe blocking software like Gamban will help you with this. It can be installed on up to 15 devices at any one time and blocks access to over 60,000 websites across the globe and is really effective in providing real time blocking to gambling websites. If you please contact us through our helpline, we can issue you a special promo link so you can get the software for up to 5 years. 

Again, a massive well done for the strength you are displaying and I hope you can keep it up 🙂 and just know, you can contact our helpline any time as we are 24/7, even if it's just for a chat about how you are feeling with things. We are here to support you and listen any way we can. 

Wishing you all the best,

Forum Admin

Wow Pink... think it's safe to say you had us all worried for a minute there!!

It's always easy to turn to gambling when money issues start to stack back up, that one win that could potentially ease the burden.. how often does that one win happen though? Even if it did happen would it stop there? Probably not...

You've done incredibly well, Day 230 is a massive achievement and look at one of the 1st things you've written... 6k in savings!!! That's incredible from where you came from borrowing money just to feed yourself, you've got your new job and a great support network so don't be afraid to use what's around you to talk through thoughts like you just had. Like normal in life sounds like everything has come at once but I believe with your strength and your determination to sit and work things out long term that you will come up with a plan for all this, maybe look at putting a gambling freeze on any bank cards just incase though at the same time.

All the best, keep staying strong and inspiring us all on here 🙂

Pink Lady,

What an absolutely incredible entry! I could feel the emotions as I was reading it but I want to say, first and foremost, well done for staying strong.

All these things happening to you over the short period must have made that urge to have one big blowout very strong, and to know that there was an avenue for you to be able to do so must have made things harder. I'm especially sorry to hear about the MOT fiasco. It's outrageous that they can do that just because you're a woman. I'd definitely make a complaint and see if you can get some of your money back on that. It's also outrageous that you are having to stump up money for repairs on your apartment that you haven't even requested.

All in all, it sounds like a very stressful time and the fact you can sit there and say you're still gamble free is an incredible achievement. So pleased for you. 230 days is amazing.

Thanks for continuing to inspire me with your journey and helping me stay on the right track with mine. 

Stay strong. 💪🏾❤️

@forum-admin Thank you so much for you positive support. 😊.

@brownie889 Hi brownie. Lovely to hear from you again.  I hope you are doing well.  Yes, as I have not gambled for so long, I completely forgot about my gambling blocks I have on my bank cards so I wouldn’t have been able to deposit anyway! 👌. I was thinking of getting Gambian installed but I don’t really want to see it on my phone so I think I will just stick to keeping the gambling blocks on my bank cards. 

I think I just had “a moment of madness”, which I know is all it can take but thankfully, common sense prevailed.

You are right, I will work through my budget and financial plans for the new year ahead and I will continue to just keep doing my best 😊🙏.

Take care brownie.

🩷🍎.

@g4pv3yauqm Thank you so much Jay for your lovely support 👍.

Life in general for most of us can be hard. What with the continuing increased costs of energy prices year in and year out and not to mention our basic needs - food and everything from car insurance to t.v packages, going up every year, it’s no wonder people are struggling. I value the fact that there are people with young families, much worse off than me, trying to make ends meet as they navigate their way leading up to Christmas 😢.

Take care and continue to keep surging ahead on your g.f journey.

🩷🍎.

Had my heart in my mouth reading that mate. Glad you saw the light though, and thanks for sharing. Just goes to show how close we can be to a slip up. 1 slip up might not be the end of the world, it might even teach us something, but on the other hand it could open the floodgates. I'm so glad you stayed away. I've not had that close call yet. I'm sure it will come. I think we will all experience this at some point. Luckily with the experiences shared by yourself and others I know I'm in a much better place to recognise it and deal with it when it comes.

Great to see you back on here and sharing your journey. 

Stay strong 👍 

@p6z38njbqm Thanks Fish 🐟💙. Seems weird even reading these posts of support and actually thinking that just out of the blue, that thought/action came to mind!🤷🏻‍♀️. I haven’t so much as given gambling a second thought since!👌.

The weeks leading up to Christmas, can often be a stressful time for most of us, however, I believe I am in a better financial position this time around. I suppose I was just feeling deflated at all my hard work setting up little pots of money in different accounts for different things but of late, have had several emails to say “this price is going up and that price is going up”!🤬🤬🤬. Then when all of the above happened to me in a matter of just a couple of weeks, I just thought “what the f - - k is going on”???🙈.

I am sure my post has made others on here stop and think for a moment. I would have done the same reading it. If nothing else (apart from making me realise how quick our thoughts can change), if it has helped others to be extra cautious and resilient and be prepared for those sudden gambling triggers to rear their ugly head and be well equipped to deal with them well that has to be a positive. 

As I mentioned earlier, it has been that long since I last gambled that I had totally forgot about having a block on any gambling transactions on my 2 debit bank cards so even if I had attempted to deposit,(which I am so glad and proud that I didn’t), the transaction would have been immediately declined 👌.

Take care Fish and yes, we are both still proudly on our g.f journey together 💪💪🙏.

🩷🍎.

@j5a6meyr4z Great job,

I think all of us have had that moment in our journeys, staring at that deposit screen knowing we can either go one way or the other, and I think all of us in the past have gone the wrong way. But we are stronger now and we know sat in that situation we will not win. So great strength from you that you did the right thing :):)

I get what your saying with the international websites. After banning myself from all UK ones thats where I found myself, and they are relentless I still receive emails, and some even after blocking them still get through. It is something I hope the government will intervene with in the future. Although they have made a lot of progress in the last few years there is still such a way to go I think to stop people even getting addicted in the first place!

@hit0f4l2rn Thank you so much Eden.  Much appreciated 👍.

🩷🍎.

Day 237.

I have had a lovely weekend 👌. Yesterday, I went into Liverpool with my sister and we met our two brothers, their wives and our cousin with his partner for food and drinks 😋. I took £100 with me but only spent £22 as my brother treated everyone! He is so kind and generous 💙. Still, it was such a nice feeling knowing I could just withdraw this amount of money from my bank account for stuff like this 👍.

Today, I was able to spend more money on Christmas bits for my home 🎄. My sister and I went shopping and then back to hers for a cuppa and cake.  She then made us a lovely meatball pasta dish for supper which was delicious. She even gave me a portion for my dinner tomorrow 🩷.

I am on annual leave tomorrow which I am glad about. Being “out out” at my age from 1pm until 11pm is pretty hardcore 🤪 but we all had a lovely time and a great catch up👌. A shorter week in work this week so that’s always a good thing.

Going to get into the loft tomorrow and bring my Christmas stuff down, in preparation for putting up my tree in early December. The weeks are just flying by!😲

My little blip last weekend contemplating whether to gamble or not (I actually at the time completely forgot about having blocks on both my bank cards as it had been almost 8 months since I last gambled) has now paled into insignificance and I am glad to report that since then, I have not so much as given gambling a further thought 👌💪🙏.

I am still going strong with my plans which includes putting small amounts of money away each week into different accounts for different things for as and when I need money for various things.

Take care all. Keep fighting the fight and enjoy your week ahead.

”April fools - no more the fool”!

Pink Lady 🩷🍎.

Day 240.

Nice day in work today. We are having a well-being week and so I was able to attend a yoga session before lunch and then half an hour before I left for home, I was booked in for a head, neck and shoulder massage 👌. What better way to end my working day!!🥰

My son is off to Sheffield tomorrow - work related and some kind of leaving meal for one of his colleagues . He gets paid on Friday and was a bit struck for cash. He asked if he could borrow some money, just to tied him over until Friday and then pay me back (he has never not paid me back when he has borrowed money from me before).  Whilst I was annoyed with him for not doing what I suggested - he start a savings fund when he got his last pay increase, secretly, I felt quite good inside, that I was in a position to be able to do this. As a parent, you always want to be able to help your children out whenever you can, as long as they don’t take advantage of you, which my son doesn’t.

Got a few nice things coming up which involves spending money but all should be ok and looking forward to enjoying the festivities leading up to Christmas 🎄. For those of you struggling right now and in fear of Christmas this year. Please let me remind you, that if you choose not to gamble anymore, I can assure you, your next Christmas will be so much better so please have faith and hang on in there 🙏.

Good night, God bless all.

”April fools, no more the fool”!

Pink Lady 🩷🍎.

Well said pinky. Christmas is when gamblers are the most exposed. The pressure to spend money for the month of December is huge and as gamblers we have no spare money, so we turn to gambling to try and win the month. It never works and gets us into more trouble. For me and you this sounds like the first December we’ve had in years where that pressure is not there. In fact we can spend it with friends and family with little concern for money. We are not wealthy, but we can spend within our means and enjoy the festivities for once. I’m looking forward to it, and it sounds like you have a great month planned too.

Great to see you doing so well in work and in home life. Love the fact you can lend money to your son. Simple things like that show us how bad we used to be with money and how much better it is now. 

Here’s to a great month ahead with no worries. 

Stay strong 💪 

@j5a6meyr4z Great point at the end there! I think decisions we make today have a big impact on our futures, and if we can make small sacrifices today our futures will be better. Well done! 🙂