Closure - 13th Feb 2014

Day 157, 158

My mind was full of optimism and possibilities yesterday, and thoughts of being CC debt free by Xmas (or at least almost) - I'm now starting to believe I can do it. This is the first time I've really felt this way in a very long time. I sat in the garden, and actually started to appreciate my surroundings, rather than being full of dread about paying off debt, and what a great feeling it was. I want this feeling to become permanent. Ok, I have a debt to my parents which will probably take another 2 years to pay off, but once CC debt is cleared then the pressure is off.

So I'm going to do this and no mistakes this time.

Michael,

I am SO SO happy for you! I have always followed your diary and have found you to be hard working and determined without fail! I strive to be like you and celebrate your good news. It gives me hope and faith. Hope that I can dig out too. And faith that hard work does pay off! Keep going bud and stay strong.

Sharon

Hi

I to have followed your journey with its highs and lows.

It brightened my day today to hear your positivity and realisation that you can see the light at the end of the tunnel

Your commitment to over coming this is inspiring as at times you were almost overwhelmed with the level of debt.

I take my hat off to you,

Dusty

Day 159->162

Thanks guys for your comments. Wow, even better news this week (moneywise), even better than the outstandingly good news I'd already received. Feet on ground, but this is about 25% CC debt gone in 2 months. Need to remain focussed and not do anything to f**k this up.

Good morning,

Great to hear you so upbeat. You deserve something good to happen after all your hard work.

I have no doubt that if you keep doing what you are doing you will get there. To have dropped you dept by 25% is an amazing feat , long may it continue.

Just wanted to offer my support , and take my hat off to you again ( you carry on like this I will send you the dam hat lol)

Dusty

Day 163->167

Getting close to the 1/2 year mark ! Anyway, pressure is being cranked up at work for me meeting a project deadline in April. However, waiting for my big pay cheque in a few weeks time. Can't wait to slash some of the CC debt away. I was all gung-ho a few days ago, but back down to earth with the reality of the situation - which will definately improve greatly soon, but still a long way to go.

All along, every since last May, I have kept this from my OH. I felt i've needed to protect her and our families from any fall-out. It hasn't been easy, but 2 pay-rises later, and some debt paid off, and the repayments are becoming easier - although the debt is still painfully high.

My wife is expecting some money through in the next few months, which will pay for a new car, a nice holiday and a few thousand in the bank for a rainy day. It's her money, but I know she's going to ask about CC debt. I don't want to lie, but I also don't want her not to enjoy 20years of savings. But then again, I've lied all along anyway. An awkward and uncomfortable situation might be just around the corner, but until then, I'd like to at least pay off CC#2 (out of 5).

Day 174

Continuing to knuckle down. Workwise, waiting for promotion opportunities to present themselves. Also, should receive some bonuses, overtime, back-dated pay and final settlement on the car during the next 2 or 3 weeks. That should equate to about 3k off the cc debt.

Hi Micheal,

3K of the debt is brilliant. I hope your promotion is still on the cards. Remember back when i said that we do get knock backs but then just a quickly other unexpected opportunities arise ?. That's exactly what i meant as you have some great opportunities coming your way and a chance to get further down the road to being debt free faster.

Keep up the good work and i hope you are still going strong.

All the best

Steven

Hi Michael,

How are you doing. I noticed you have not posted for a while and i hope all is ok ?.

I really hope all is well and you are still on course and going strong.

All the best

Steven

Day 181

Thanks Steven, Your continuing support is really appreciated. I really must contribute more to the other diaries on this forum !

Nearly 6 months since my last bet, and it seems like a million miles away now. I've had no gambling thoughts as such, but I still feel that, if the situation was right (or wrong), with my guard down, then I could sink back into my old ways.

I've worked my n*ts off since last May, when I started this diary. I must have put literally an extra 100hrs/month in for the last 10months (1000hrs) to claw this debt back, and the heartbreaking thing is, the amount of extra cash I've earned is probably still less than the amount I lost in 3hrs of sheer madness last May... and I'm sure I'm not alone with this.

I knuckle down, and keep believing that I can get this debt paid off, and everything will be OK again. Life will return to normality.

Things are looking up at the mo, I have a few obstacles to overcome at work and at home, but generally, things are getting better, with a decent payrise which makes those min payments a little easier, and a potential promotion in the pipeline which would be great.

Life can change in an instant, the smallest of wrong decisions can lead to life-changing events. I'm lucky, because my wrong decision (on the 19th Sept 2008) can be fixed. But it's cost me 3.5yrs of my life to date, and probably another 2yrs at this rate. I honestly don't think I'd have ended up where I am today, if I'd not won £100 with that £10 bonus when I signed up to that Casino.

But who knows what life would have had in store for me if I hadn't have made that wrong decision. I know I wouldn't have been as strong a person and more appreciative about what I have in life. In terms of the money, which I'm forever banging on about, I know that I wouldn't have had the income I have now.

It's the same with anything in life I guess, you really have to try and take the positives from every situation - and my situation is no different. I often feel some pride in my achievement, and sorry if it sounds a little smug, but there are often situations in life now that would previously wind me up but which now don't. A manager having a go at me, a friend complaining about something, a family issue etc, and I just think "If you only knew".

So I continue to knuckle-down, a big payout coming in a few weeks which should knock £3000 of one of the Credit Cards. Still a massive debt, but inch-by-inch, it gets easier.

Hi Michael,

Taking pride does not sound smug at all. You should be very proud of how far you have come by sheer hard work and full on determination. I take my hat of to you for the way you are fighting, and winning on all fronts. As you say in a way the debt has got you to where you are now through the extra hours you are doing you are up for promotion. And when the debt is gone you shall still be getting that extra income and be alot wiser and much much stronger.

My diary is called want to quit and there may be some useful advice you can put into use that i received from others here but ill leave that to your choice.As you said a while back in your diary " some of the mo st supportive people are on here, yet people we will never meet or know " words that could not be put better myself as i found that out with the support i received from some great people on here, their help and support got me to where i am today and i thank them all immeasurably.

I became debt free a few months ago but, even though my debt was on a smaller scale i can understand your feelings especially as far as the OH finding out.That was my main worry more than the money.

You are right to take the positives and there will be down days also as you know but opportunities shall and do come along.

You are doing fantastic my friend. Keep chipping away and soon you shall be smashing away the debt instead of chipping at it. As you said yourself, you can fix this and be a stronger and wiser person after.

A very big well done and keep it up my friend.

All the best

Steven

Hi Michael, have not seen anything from you for a little while. Hope all is well, am sure it is.

Give us an update when ever you get a chance.

Day 195

Wow, 2 weeks since my last update. The days are just flying by now. Gambling has certainly not been on the agenda, although I do have the odd fleeting thought, even now.

Feeling a bit strange at the moment, a calmness has come over me, and life's pressure don't seem to be getting to me as much. A good thing in alot of ways, but I musn't get complacent. I still believe I have a very long way to go.

Hi Michael.

Glad to hear all is well. Calm is good but its when it can be dangerous also as we can feel at ease to much and get caught out. I myself even after all this time had a bad week last week. I thought a few times about gambling but it did not do it. The urges came out of nowhere and i am glad you are staying on guard.

Well done buddy and glad you updated as we sometimes see people disappear for the wrong reasons so glad all is still ok with you on the gambling front.

We are all here if you need a yell or some support Michael so just holler if you need to.

All the best and keep up the great work.

Steven

Hi

I too have followed your journey since day one. Remember some of your posts and my heart went out to you as you tried to come to terms with the enormity of the task ahead.

So hearing today , how you are feeling so much calmer made me sigh with relief. I know you got along to go, but by sticking to your guns you are beginning to turn the corner and what at times you felt was unachievable is now a spec of light at the end of a very long tunnel

I have so much respect for you.

Dusty