Today is day 0 feel pain, self loathing, worthlesness, all the usual, became too complacent and thought i`d beaten my adictive behaviour, was VERY wrong. REMEMBER THIS DAY IT WILL HELP!!!!!.
Hi knobby - Stay strong - Day 1 of sanity tomorrow!
Joanna
Wise choice coming here, Knobby. Make this the first day of a new chapter in your life.
Wish you the best on your journey ahead.
-Alex
Knobby
welcome to the forum,more importantly welcome to recovery.
you will find on offer here a wealth of help,support and some amazing advice all gifted unconditionally by like minded folk who share the same goal. to end the destruction and misery gambling offers us the compulsive gambler.
I will offer you the advice gifted to me on my first days recovery that still works today
there is a triangle
Time-Money-Location
take one away at all times and the punt becomes impossible
gifting yourself the chance to re-wire your addled brain.
If you give half the energy to recovery you did to the act of gambling you offer yourself the opportunity to become a winner,with irony without staking a single penny of your hard earned.
Take all the help out there self exclude,get blocking software.
One day at a time you can better your life,yes the shi##t is still there but you won't pile any more on it.
Be kind to yourself
most of all enjoy it
Duncs stepping forward never back
well today is day 1 and i`m pleased to say today i diddnt gamble, infact i didnt spend a penny which is completely alien to me. My sundays usually revlove around me making dinner and washing the car with a visit to the corner shop for a packet of f**s a couple of scratchcards and a 4 pack of beer, I usualy make dinner half cut but today was different i diddnt goto the shop, we have some baccy in that i smoked. Feel worse today than i did yesterday but the day after a binge is always the worst for me feelings of uslessness,worthlessness,anger,depression, etc etc. The only thing that goes through my mind at the minute is why couldnt i do this every day? I really do just want to chop both my arms off at the moment but then i`d probably just try and spit the money into the machines. this really is going to take time to come to terms with and i am adimant that it is not going to beat me and i will be a better person for me aswell as my loved ones.x
tomorrow i will not gamble you can bet on that!!!
Thank you for your reply guys.
Well today is day 2 and not a great day returning to work after a bad weekend with all the talk of boxing and greyhounds and who won what and who lost what, I have just realised 50% of the 30 ppl i work with gamble regulary, Still feel angry,sad,frustrated, my head is still spinning but today i did not gamble. It`s time to draw a line in the sand and let go of the past and try to make a better future. i wish every1 who is fighting this problem all the strengh to fight and stay stong, I AM GOING TO BE A WINNER I AM GOING TO BEAT THIS.
TOMORROW I WILL NOT GAMBLE
Hi Knobby,
Welcome to the diaries, well done for taking the stand, and well do we all know the feelings you are going through now. Ranging from despair to a complete misunderstanding of how all that money could go with nothing to show for it. Speaking with people who do gamble on a regular basis may be something that you will have to steel yourself against, but as you say, in order to be a real winner you have to beat the addiction.
I spent much of Sunday and today talking about the Froch v Groves fight, but that was because of a genuine passion for the sport. I know it may not feel like it now, but genuinely enjoying sport for the sake of it is something that recovery gives back. One small part of the many gifts recovery offers.
You've made a good start, and by not gambling tomorrow the next step on this journey will continue.
All the best
Ryan
Well today is day 3, today i did not gamble, Still feel crapy but i think the emotion i`m most feeling today is frustration. Think today was a better day i hope sanity returns and normal service resumes shortly. Stay strong,
TOMORROW I WILL NOT GAMBLE.
Well day 4 has come and gone and today i did not gamble, feel a little better today but had some crazy urges stomped on them very quickly, Which is very strange as i usualy go days/weeks without urges, but because ive said NO I`M NOT GOING TO GAMBLE they seem to be popping up when they diddnt used to. YOU WILL NOT BEAT ME THIS TIME. Stay strong.
TOMORROW I WILL NOT GAMBLE.
Well today is day 5 and today i did not gamble, Had a couple of tests today and past them both. had to go into town this morning to the doctors would have usually involved a trip to the arcade but it didnt. and some one was handing out forms at work 2 quid a go for some silly world cup gamble thing. just an in house 1 top scorer who wins which group etc. i politely said no thanks and instead gave the 2 quid to some1 who is doing a race for life this weekend as sponsorship. today i feel a little better. TOMORROW I WILL NOT GAMBLE. BE STRONG
day 7. Well make it to a week of not gambling , Seem to more determined than ever to beat this, had a better day today kept busy doing nothing really but didnt go anywhere i shouldnt have gone a diddnt spend anyhting i shouldnt have. Saturday is a hard day for me no work and usually finding time/making excuses, to pop off into town for a couple of hours. But i`m not going to do that any more. Going on a 25 mile bike ride tomorrow. then off to the gym followed by tea at the pub will be kept busy all day. good, wont have time for silly thoughts in my head tomorrow. TOMORROW I WILL NOT GAMBLE, STAY STRONG
hi Knobby,
Was nice to meet my first fellow gambler on the chat room last night. Now you will always be in my mind as you were my first ha ha..
I am on day 5 and its been a very painful five days not because of urges just realization and all the rest of the ugly emotions we go through. I am going to use the chat room as an extra defense so will be in there tonight i think. I hope we can go on for months years about our positive stories of abstinence, oh and well done for avoiding the Saturdays a day we all can relate to my friend. Keep strong you will do it.
CasinoRoyaLoser
Hi Knobby, good chatting with you last night seems we both started our recovery on the same day!
Well done on coming so far today is another opportunity to keep moving forward and not gamble!
We are doing well and i'm sure as time passes the future will look even better.
Have a good day, stay strong, remember those feelings last saturday and keep using them as motivation to not gamble.
Day 8
Been far too busy today to even entertain a single thought of gambling, Today has been a good day. It`s just occured to me most days end as good or as bad as we make them, overcome and rise above it. I am really not as bad a person as i believe i am, learn from your mistakes and move foreward don`t dwell in the past that i cannot change i CAN change my future, AND I WILL.
ty for your time reading my diary, ty for your posts guys it means a lot, TOMORROW I WILL NOT GAMBLE
day 10
sat contemplating the long long road ahead, feeling worn out already but still fighting and still winning. TOMORROW I WILL NOT GAMBLE
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