day 3

hi john thanks for posting on my diary it means alot.

I thought i'd come and take a look at your diary and didn't expect it to go back to 2006!! - and then there was quite a gap...but good to see your back and fighting this.

I am on day 5 and its tough. I don't know what the future holds. Where will i be in 2 years time?? Hopefully still posting and reading and happy to report my last bet was still 5th Jan 2010. But i am a realist.I know i will always have the gambling bug in me...

Good luck and keep in touch.

thanks 4 posting simon , jeff, winningpost, a38 and eveyone else that has looked at my thread. yes started cracking away at this in 2006!! its been a hard slog but well worth the effort. there was a big gap , lots was going on . while the missus was having her last op i decided it was time to move the family to somewhere nice. so as its what she always wanted looked for a country village that i could commute from. couldnt find anything i could afford till one morning went on right move and a house literally jumped out at me , i know this sounds strange but entered the details for the search and this house just popped up full screen !!! i know i didnt imagine it as i was just showing a work mate where i wanted to go . anyway i took the wife ( who had now been out of hospital a couple of weeks ) to view the very next morning and did a bit of my straight talkin ( admitting my house wernt even on the market yet )did the deal on the spot. my house was sold '3 days later and we were moved in within 11 weeks . wont quote dates cos reading back through im not remembering them right. anyway ive now got 120 mile round trip to do on top of my days work which when you do varying shifts aint user friendly!!. managed this for around a year with eyes and ears open for a new job. during this time we very sadly lost my sister in law who was a huge cog in the family machine and the missus took this as would be expected. the missus (whose health is on the up ) was very low. the kids are thriving in their new surroundings and i put myself about in the village and made friends , the bi-product of one of these friendships was getting the missus something to focus on. a new mate of mine worked with horses ( not racing LOL ) and we got her helping him . she went from strength to strength has her own nag now and practically lives at his place and is great friends with his wife .during all of this i managed to find a job closer to home ( men cant multi task ) started that in july 2008 and think my guard dropped just after. as part of a course i was on we were put up at wolverhampton racecourse ( my room right above the pre parade ring) . well we finished early one day sat in the bar right next to the parade ring , the lads all non gamblers didnt know me at all wanted a bet. now i didnt want to start a confesion here so said dont want to see a paper will pick horses on looks... dont even need to tell you what happened do i .. no thought not, but anyway didnt pick one that finished out of the frame including a big price winner .now i didnt surprisingly dive straight back in but did so within weeks. coming up to date i re- registered here calling myself 'anothertry' now after some thought i decided that if i was gonna help anyone it would be better to let everyone see how long i have been at this and how i have failed and succeeded and reverted to posting in my own name. so on we go . good luck everyone. john.

John I loved your post this morning,

Think a lot of people have juggled with names as they deem it a fresh start or clean slate and a diary that may have no 'dirty marks' on it. As you said on my diary, everyone has slip ups and its part of being an ex-gambler. No point trying to erase them, they are part of our journey.

It was lovely to read about how you built a new wee life in the country (something id love myself). You have done so well for yourself and your wife. I hope you continue to go onward and upward from here.

Best wishes

Eyes X

thanks eyes, it is lovely here nothing like where i grew up ! the house is smaller than my last but that dont matter. i feel the kids are safe wifey is now happier. we got a river running through the middle of the village 3 pubs a paper shop a roll shop , a doctor and a post office and its 5 miles to the nearest betting shop !! shall i change my name to 'smug B*****r' the research i did was worth while and i would reccomend anyone do the same. best of luck with your move eyes. john.

Hi John,

thanks for your post of support. Hope to be of help to you someday too.

Take care,

f x

thanks for the post john.

tried to read your diary but so much.....

will come back when more time.for now your support and others is keeping me going.what ever else you acheive in life you have done something good here-for me-thanks!!!

Hi John, Thanx for your message of support on my diary. I have just read that you are back after a break. Hope you do as well this time around as you have done in the past. Goes to show that i will always have a fight on my hands and never to take recovery for granted. Take care of yourself

thanks jimmym7 bex and eveyone, went to dentist yesterday ( on orders of wifey ) cos i aint been for 20yrs !! exept for looking like a dogs teeth there ok but she wanted me and the kids to go . imagine her disapointment when the dentist said my gnashers were ok !! on the gambling front had some daft thoughts , but been there before same old thoughts same old trying to con myself . the good thing is ive been there before and i know it so well, i now realise its all a vicioius circle just gotta keep remembering that, good luck all . john.

Try to treat gambling like the dentist but instead of waiting 20 years have a check up everyday. Like your teeth if you have not gambled no work is required other than to take care.

Hi John

Just wanted to say well done for not giving in to those urges m8. As you say youve been there before.You will beat this all the best Jeff.

Glad the dentists went ok, I didnt have such good luck when I went after years of neglect, lol.

Thanks for your post john, hope you are well.

Take care,

f x

thanks for reply mate. dentists is scary!

hi john. . Not read any of your posts for a while. . Hope your ok mate because when you post on other diaries its inspirational. . Keep the fight up we can do it.

Just revisited this old journey , it's a tonic to read through it all even if not nice in places but .........here we go again 🙂

Here we go again !! Anyone that thinks that this is a quick fix look at me !! Its a life long battle for sure but I will keep repeating you have to keep that guard up. ( just need to listen to myself LoL ) Day 2 today .