Day One (again)

3 days gamble free.

Feeling positive today. I met up with my dad in person and went into more depth about everything. How much I've lost, what I owe, plans in place to beat this for good etc.

It was great to openly chat to someone close to me about the troubles I've had and how long I've had them. I want to dig deeper as to why I gamble.

Also contacted a counsellor who will assess me over the phone on Monday. Looking forward to speaking to her.

Hi Gav1987,

Welcome to the forum again, and thanks for sharing your story with us.

It seems you’ve been struggling with your gambling problem for some time, and you now feel determined and ready to put that to rest. Since you said you’ve been here before, you kind of know what sort of help we offer. You’ll also get some support and encouragement from fellow forum members too, hopefully.

It’s a step in the right direction when you disclosed to your dad, and thankfully, he’s giving you his support too.

Please note that we are here to help and support you with advice on strategies to enable you to overcome your gambling problem.

Kindly let us know how you are doing in your counselling sessions, we hope it all goes well for you, though.

Meanwhile, you can contact our free phone Helpline on: 0808 8020 133, and speak 1 to 1 with one of our advisers about your gambling problem. Our lines are open every day from 8.00am to midnight.

Our recommended blocking software are:- Gamblock, Betfilter, Net Nanny and Gamban. You’ve got nothing to lose by reading about them and knowing how they function.

Gamcare hasn’t got a free blocking software to recommend but, some of our callers have mentioned K9, a free blocker that works well for them. Perhaps you may like to research on that and install it to help stop you from online gambling.

Also make sure you keep yourself busy with hobbies and other activities to distract you from gambling.

Wishing you the best in your recovery, and please keep posting!

Kind regards,

Beatrice

Hi Gav,

Sorry to hear of your recent relapse but very well done for opening up and telling your dad.

I heard someone at GA say that the biggest high that they ever got from gambling was when he had eventually told his wife. Getting it off your chest is the most amazing feeling however it is only the beginning of a long road. But you've taken that first step and sounds like you have a good plan in place.

Not sure about the Android software as I have an iPhone but I have software called K9 on my phone and laptop and it blocks all the gambling sites. Give it a look, maybe they do an android version.

Also regarding your finances I went to citizens advice and called all of the credit card companies I owed money too and explained my situation and they were all hugely helpful. I told them about my gambling problem too, it didn't cause a problem.

I find the counselling brilliant too. I've been really surprised at how easy it was to open up to a complete stranger but it feels great.

Good luck mate, PA

Day 7. Nearly 1 week gamble free.

I spoke with a counsellor yesterday and had an assessment over the phone regarding my gambling habits and have arranged a 1-2-1 counselling session on Wednesday 31st May. Something I'm really looking forward to and will approach with an open mind.

I've asked my Gran to help me out temporarily with my finances. If she can help, the money will be going directly to pay off debt (rather than sit in my account tempting me to gamble). A horrible favour to ask of her but this is my best option realistically just now. If she can't help I'll need to have a re-think.

Thanks for the comments PA. I've looked into K9 before but it looks like Android can't support it. Anyway, I am due a phone upgrade at the end of the month so will be getting an i-phone so I can download K9. Small steps but hoping they'll make a big difference.

Day 14.

2 weeks gamble free today and I've been handed a massive lifeline. My Gran has lent me a substantial amount of money to clear some debts.

I realise I am very lucky that she has bailed me out of my financial mess. I will of course have to pay her back. I would never expect to be given the money and wouldn't accept being given it either, given the circumstances. The money is going to pay off debts caused primarily from my gambling addiction.

I now feel my finances are managed again for the first time in years. This will go a long way in keeping my mind off gambling.

Feeling positive and looking forward to the football tomorrow night and the weekend.

Day 31.

One month gamble free. Had my first ever counselling session today. I went in with an open mind and I believe it was constructive.

The counsellor touched on many feelings and experiences I can relate to and we scratched the surface on why I gamble. The main trigger for me has always been money pressure and me thinking I need more money. Once that first get is placed I become a different person, completely trapped in a circle of addiction. Mindless bets get placed and i spend hours, days, weeks and months with gambling at the forefront of my mind, losing obscene amounts of money and exhausting myself. I lose focus on work, relationships and lose sleep.

In the past, I've quit gambling for long periods but have always ended up going back. Any urges I get in the future I need to act on. Talk to someone and wait for the feeling to pass.

Admit. Accept. Action. I learned today that these are the three steps of addiction. I've admitted and accepted I'm an addict. I just need continue acting against it.